Here I am, creating a women's group, with a number of events. This is a mini miracle. When I go out with the women, I feel like an oddity, not having much to say. I am not in the mainstream and find regular conversations difficult. I .make myself still go. I never liked small talk. I need to write and express this frustration. I was never married, never owned property, my career was spotty, and my personal interests were usually solo activities due to depression and early emotional neglect. I feel ashamed of myself but still make myself participate. I hope things improve,but its hard to fill the large void. I hope someone here understands.
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Written by
samack
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I love your profile picture! I’ve been thinking a love of fond thoughts about carol burnett. I wrote earlier…some of us a social klutzes like some people suck at sports. I’ve kind of learned to manage too. Still bothers me.
Oh I get it. Back in January I tried joining a womens Bible study group at a local modern Christian church near me to try to socialize with some other women. It just didn’t feel right for me. It seems like I only feel like I can be myself going to self help groups for anxiety and depression. Otherwise I feel like a lot of people put up false fronts.
Been there and had the same experience. I guess people can't relate if they haven't experienced what we do. Others just lack empathy. 🈸😦 I hope you find a good support group. I need one too!
I hear you and understand. I would love to be apart of a group that you start. Blessings to you and know you are not alone there are others that care about you and know what you are going through right now.
Right there with ya’, sista. It’s amazing what we can do out of need or want. Most of my life social interaction was a necessary evil. Then I reached a point where I could choose to interact or not and I mostly didn’t. Now, I’m getting major stirrings of a need for companionship. Ready to test the waters. In the shallow end at first, of course. Go get ‘em, samack! 😁
Many thanks to you lsinatra. It is a catch 22 as I don't relate to most people. I feel like Charlie Brown listening to his teacher, wah,wah,wah come the voices. Yesterday, I was with two women on an outing. I think I spoke 2 sentences worth, as I couldn't relate to everyday back and forth. But so it shall be. I have to learn to accept my limitations. Bah humbug.
You have nothing to be ashamed of. Your life (mine too) is different from the lives of the other women, but they probably also have things they are ashamed of (we are more alike than we are different). You could always tell them that you are an introvert, feel as if you have little to say - and Covid has changed the way we socialise so that even people you perceive as being good in company are finding it difficult to come out and into company again.
We don't have to talk about ourselves anyway. Listening to others is a skill that will endear you to them and you may find their lives interesting enough that you can join the conversation. One to one is good but if you are in a group you can get away with not saying much. Well done for forming this group. Not everyone could do that.
Proud of you! Just very proud of you! Nobody cares about the things you never did or owned. All it takes is 1 person you can make a difference to in life. And you can’t see them if you don’t go out.
Wow I think your perseverance is amazing! It takes alot of energy to do what you are doing while depressed. I believe you will develop some satisfying relationships. I wish I could attend. I am very isolated and have alot of fatigue. I wish you much peace and success! 😀💖
You know Tara, it came spontaneously. It wasn't a result of psychotherapy. I ran the gamut of therapy with no success. I couldn't find any support groups, and oh so isolated. A mystery of life. Wish you could be here too.
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