Anxiety and severe depressed

[Rina12]

Hello everyone,

I would like to share my story with anxiety and depression, and I would like to hear you advice!!! it all started two years ago when I gave birth for my first child, feeling overwhelmed couldn’t sleep or eat or enjoy anything!! I reached out for help and with my moms help and medication I got so much better. A year and a half after that out of the blues, my anxiety came back again and was so severe that I got deeply depressed, and until the medications started to work it took a long time, today I’m much better and getting counseling, the only problem that keeps haunting me is my own thoughts of that when I was depressed I couldn’t think of my daughter of someone who can give me strength to get out of this situation, that taking care of her was a burden on me, that if my life got me to this situation, going back to my same life (which was mostly being at home and doing all the house duties and taking care of my child) is not something that I could look forward to.. even though I’m much better today and I know I love my child these thoughts keep haunting me!! Like how could I be so selfish??? How is it possible for a mother to think that way?? Does anyone know this feeling or had this feeling ever or is it only me????

[Shnookie]

So sorry that U went thru this and feel this way. I believe what U had is what we call in U.S.!postpartum depression. This means that after U gave birth U had a hormonal imbalance which can lead to severe depression. U have nothing to feel soot about. U R lucky that U had your mom’s support team to obtain meds to help deal with your depression. I’m here 4 U.Hugs 🤗 Shnookie ❤️💪

Chazak v Amatz

[Rina12]

My anxiety and depression returned after a year and a half from my birth and when I was feeling so depressed I couldn’t think of my daughter as someone who I can get out of the depression for, it was like I felt she was a great responsibility that I can’t do now and that maybe I don’t really love her (which today I know I do and I always did) thinking of being at home alone taking care of her just made me more anxious and today these feelings keep bothering me! How could I have thought so??? What kind of a mother am I?

[Sabbath1]

Sounds relatively normal for new mothers to feel that way. Happens to alot of people. Doesn't make you a bad mom you know you love your baby .

And to answer the question what kind of mother are you, as long as you love and take care of your baby and do no harm then you're a great mother.

[Rina12 in reply to Sabbath1]

I know but I’m not a new mother this happened a year and a half after her birth

[cbgrace1980]

What you went through was a symptom of depression. Many people experience that as part of Post Partum Depression. I'm so glad that you are doing better now and getting with a counselor. The thoughts were brought on by the depression and were not your actual thoughts. Hugs to you.

[Rina12 in reply to cbgrace1980]

Thank you for your reply! I know I had postpartum two months after pregnancy, but now after a year and a half again? Is that possible? I feel so much guilt for loosing interest in my life and even my daughter!