How to overcome my sensitivity?

[animefan94]

Hello, I’m looking for advice. It’s ok if you’re not perfect at this, I just need some support. I’m a highly sensitive person. I’ve never handled criticism all that well. It can also be hard for me to tell the difference between constructive criticism and rude behavior. Professional wise, it’s maybe the first. But I’ve also seen the latter. Some people are completely chill and unbothered by what others say. I wish I was like that, but I fall apart easily. How can I do better on this?

[animefan94]

Thanks, but easier said than done not thinking about anything

[samack]

Judith Orloff MD writes a lot about highly sensitive people and how to protect our energy when we get bothered by things In our environment out of our control. We have positive attributes that we need to appreciate. And we also have a tougher time being triggered more. Look her up.

[Rafiki11]

Some people may seem chill when they are actually bothered. Everyone is acting. No one actually feels like an adult.

I think building up shame resilience really helps, too. I suggest reading the book Daring Greatly by Dr. Brene Brown.

[Laurennnnnnn]

I highly recommend reading The Four Agreements! Or at least the first part that talks about “the first agreement” which is being impeccable with your word. It talks a lot about why people say what they say and how to not let those things control you.

I still struggle (it’s easier said than done to just fix your mindset) but it has helped reframe some of my thinking

[Broken1971]

I am like this too. I did DBT for several years (dialect behavioral therapy). It didn't solve the problem but gave me a lot of tools to cope with these feelings...and people!

[Salix211]

Ugh, I relate to this SO much! Just wanted to say, you're not alone. And there is so much truth in the comments already (going to look up some of these resources myself)!

Something very simple that's helped me handle situations better is remembering that criticisms are always opinions (of ONE person), not necessarily facts. Also - you NEVER know what the criticizer is going through in their own life, so I try to remember that largely the criticism can be a reflection of their own insecurities or personal situation. Someone here mentioned The Four Agreements, which I only read part of, but the section about not letting what others say control you is very similar & helpful.

[FearIsALiar]

There’s a book called the highly sensitive person. It’s a wonderful book for people like us. It helped me have a better understanding of myself

[FearIsALiar]

I’m the same way.

I recommend looking into the book called

“The highly sensitive person” by Elaine (can’t remember her last name) but the book was recommended to me since I am a HSP. Haven’t gotten around to reading it but my therapist recommended it to me