Witness

[6ixtyon1]

...so, first, a warning for anyone with triggers about alcoholism and it's after- (and during) effects...this may not make for pleasant reading.

Loved-one mixing/using copious amts. of var. alcohols and otc meds., about ev. 5 days, for a usage total of about 3 to 5 days, start to finish. Funds come fr. loved-one's private acct. & now, esp. w/Covid, said-items are delivered to the love-one's side of the house, as they are a half-owner, legally, of the house.

Current loved-one is v. competent when sober, but longtime ADD/PTSD/Depression still isn't being addressed, plus past discussions about current conditions are now closed to, "I'm Fine." Still expressing love towards loved-one, but not enabling...

However, new trend for loved-one is to be nearly unable to speak, while sitting in urinary fluids, sometimes up to nearly 2 days (no fecal matter...don't know if this is a good sign, or not)...can't move loved-one, due to size and suggestions for the firepersons to come and do a courtesy lift are imm. shouted down.

So, I come back to their side of the house and make certain that they are still breathing/not falling out of their chair...how many times a day depends upon how much appears to have been ingested.

I know what Al-Anon suggests: if you try to auto-correct, then you delay the acceptance of the ill person admitting that they need help, and thus, them asking for it, themselves...

Just wondering, though: am I the only one out there who witnesses things like this?

If not, what do the rest of you folks do to extra-cope?

I already have a great counselor who very greatly understands...but, I'm finding that it's almost not enough, especially in these last 3 months...

Should I start inquiring about hospice help, discretely? It's frightening how much the human body can endure, but this has been v. slowly escalating for the past 20 years...I'm saddened that the time for healing might very probably be almost past. If a stroke afflicts my loved-one, for example, I need to be prepared...but, how?

Thank you for your patience and understanding.

[Isinatra]

Hello. ❤️ Not only am I a recovering alcoholic of many years, I’ve had direct experience many times of your situation. My being from the US , laws and treatments may vary from yours. From what I can gather from your story, it sounds like your loved one may be past the point of making any rational decision for themself. If I were in your shoes, I’d be on the phone, reaching out to the medical community to get guidance to help your loved one. You , alone, cannot be the fixer. If loved one continues as is, there will be slow, tortuous suffering and then death. I know the monumental frustration of watching an alcoholic slowly die, with or without help. It will be a hard task to do to try to help someone that doesn’t want it. Key word, try. Your loved one will probably need to be in a hospital when he/she goes through withdrawals. When you (if you do) initially speak to doctors, don’t skimp on details. They need to understand the seriousness of the situation. It won’t be an easy road to travel. For your loved one or yourself. First the body must heal, then the mind. Pm me if you would like to talk. Lots of stuff for you to think about. ❤️🏄‍♀️

[Hidden in reply to Isinatra]

Absolutely correct!! I'm glad you you put it put there like this to day hey this is an serious thing they're going thru. I.agree with everythi g you said.

@ 6ixtyon1- I.kniw this was a while ago but I hoped your loved one got the help they need to heal.🌹

[Isinatra in reply to Hidden]

Alcoholism is a deadly disease that seems to keep being brushed under the rug. It is its own pandemic, but thank goodness it’s not contagious. Manufacturers of alcohol pay big bucks to keep it from the forefront of attention. They perpetuate the stigma of alcoholism. They should be taxed to pay for their role in the destruction of people’s lives. The insurance industry passes along the cost of covering the destruction of alcoholism to us. Same with the medical community when an under or uninsured alcoholic needs psychiatric or medical care. We pay for that. We just don’t pay out of pocket, we pay with our souls…..suffering. If the stigma of alcoholism could be lessened, then it wouldn’t stay anonymous. It could be talked about openly without fear or judgement. Like any other disease….cancer, diabetes, mental illness…..the list is endless. It’s a Disease, people, not a weakness of character.