Falling

[Lostonceagain]

I feel like I’m falling back into a bad place in my life, I feel empty and use drugs to fill my emptiness. I know it’s wrong, but I’m lost and feel like there’s nothing to help me find my way

[Marysblue]

Never give up hope . What are some good coping skills you use?

[Lostonceagain in reply to Marysblue]

At the moment I feel like I don’t have any “good” coping skills, most of my coping mechanisms are unhealthy.. I’m aware of some things I could do. I like art and going outside with my dogs. But trying to be artistic I just end up frustrated with myself for not being good enough. Honestly today I’m just sitting dwelling on all the mistakes I’ve made over the last few months

[Marysblue in reply to Lostonceagain]

Dwelling on the past and our mistakes is going to cause more depression. Do those things that bring you some Joy. Who cares if it's not great art. If it's helping you. You could writedown what you're grateful for ,it's hard to be depressed and grateful at the same time. Exercise. Meditate. Read books on self-improvement or watch YouTube videos on it to learn more coping skills.Drugs and alcohol are really bad for depression in the long run as im sure you know.

[Lostonceagain in reply to Marysblue]

For some reason I feel like I have to dwell on things so I can try to fix my mistakes? I know this doesn’t work either, you can’t change the past. But I always seem to do this.. writing what I’m grateful for is good but even things I’m grateful for I seem to find a reason to be sad about it, I love being with my dogs but even when I’m having fun with them I’ll end up thinking how they’re getting older and I think how much time they may have left, I literally feel like I take the happiness out of everything, I get to experience it for a brief moment before I think of something negative. Why can’t I just enjoy a moment and not look back to dark times or look ahead to the worst case scenario?.. I’m sorry if it seems like I’m being difficult, but I just don’t understand anymore

[Marysblue in reply to Lostonceagain]

All those things you describe are depression. Work on some positive things that will get you less depressed. Self-care ,self-compassion . I have to remember this to . this is a really difficult time we're going through and I need to be nice to myself . Do the things you enjoy today.

[Lostonceagain in reply to Marysblue]

You’re right, it’s something I should be aware of at this point. It’s just when things get bad it’s like I forget that these are symptoms of an illness or any of the things I’ve learned over the years to help it

[Marysblue in reply to Lostonceagain]

Yeah I know ,when we're really depressed we seem to forget everything we know and all the good stuff that will get us out of it.

[Lostonceagain in reply to Marysblue]

Yeah things just aren’t going well right now. In the back of my mind I know eventually I’ll be okay again.. But part of me just wonders what the point is when I know I’ll always have this emptiness that brings me down, and in turn I neglect the people close to me and I feel even worse.

[Marysblue in reply to Lostonceagain]

Have hope.