HELP

[Tiggerakafidgity]

Ok I need some real hard core mind bending puckering up.

I’ll try totally some of the story that happened to me today I’m sorry for my spelling my cognitive impairment is at its max and I cannot type this so I’m speaking into my phone I had a hearing today over the phone with the court against my wife she has set a non-molestation order on me from September The 23rd which means I am allowed no contact with my wife my two stepchildren one which is lovely and the other one is most probably born from the devil I asked today if I could send a birthday card to my stepson the judge asked my wife my wife said no this is what I have a molestation order against you she accused me of every single abuse under the sun there is no evidence to suggest that I abused my wife it is all taken on the women’s word face value which is totally wrong and they seem to think that emotional abuse is okay to be underlined as physical abuse I would like to tell you I was born in a lovely family it wasn’t easy but I would not have not and don’t intend to hurt a fly as my mum said to me I will never get a nice girlfriend because I’m too nice I laughed say my wife said that she had cleared out the whole of my workshop of all my exotic wood that I finally created with my mind having ADHD it was a get out clause of life I feel so numb I don’t know the pain I feel is I feel as though my soul has been ripped out and I don’t know whether the pain is greater for the fact that she has literally destroyed everything that I have made and she knows it to hurt me or the pure betrayal of such a wonderful wife that I loved more than life its self as you could probably imagine having ADHD it’s hard to decipher how you feel is your mind feeling the pain is your mind making up the pain all I know is that I feel as though my heart and soul has been sliced inch by inch hurting me to grading me deeper and deeper. As some of you will have seen my post you’ve all said I’m positive I’m upbeat if you and if you want to look back to April and see the absolute almighty cataclysmic pile of crap that I’ve had to deal with the aftermath of my wife lying spending housing benefit making us poor blaming me for telling the kids off and telling me off in front of the kids me being hit my my stepdaughter on the left hand side of my head where I have a benign tumour because she doesn’t agree with what I say yeah I’ve never taught her any violence I’ve never taught her any maliceI’ve only ever had half a panic attack once before and I do believe that I am actually having a slight panic attack I don’t know if I’m really in reality or virtual reality anything I touched doesn’t feel real my mind having to overcompensate keep my body churning away my legs giving way I’m panting I’m wheezing with every breath I take I am just at a loss As to how somebody can just hurt somebody I’ve hardened up over my life and I can stand on my own 2 feet and I’m more than self-sufficient. I’m not putting this down to a bad start of 2021 because I will not tolerate being treated in such a despicable intolerable poisonous toxic fashion.

I know things will be better tomorrow and that’s probably why I’m still alive but please please anyone just if it’s a Hi I don’t come on here very often to ask for a lot I’m always giving out and helping ppl.

I’m sure some of you over the last week have chatted with me and I’ve even been told how positive I am and how I write my passages and I’ve been congratulated on it.

Just tell me I can do it and I’ll believe you I think all the years of meditation is not keeping me sane,He’s just stopping me think I feel more than I think which is good because it’s good to go by the way of your heart but all I ask is for a little help.

T

[Hidden]

U def have help and friends here who care about u n r here for u.Life throws us terrible things in our life n sometimes we have to vent out our frustrations,n move on as a lifes lesson,otherwise we can destroy ourselves in the process.

Huge hug coming ur way my friend.

Here anytime for ya n u know that😁

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Hidden]

Thanks hun for your support 👍

[Hidden in reply to Tiggerakafidgity]

U got this my friend....rise up like a Phoenix from all this👍💛

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Hidden]

Hey

Omg this is funny.as the single antihistamine didn’t work at neither did two tablets.

Well I’ve taken 3.omg I hope I don’t eat another air freshener in the middle of the night.

See when the chips are burnt and melted I’ve still got that silly sense of humour.

You know I’ve had three lovely long chats with best mates all ringing to see how I am.

I just cannot believe she chucked out my such lovely hand made headphones well 6 I had made.

My mind has closed for the night and I’m so feeling this unbelievable torrid meteor storm of pain,like every rock taking another chunk out of own self.

I’m sorry I don’t ever moan and I do believe hippolove1 will verify this.

I’m to scared to go to sleep.dont as me why I just do.

Thanks for listening

[Hidden in reply to Tiggerakafidgity]

Ur r always welcome.Glad ur mates r there to support u.Here if ya still need to talk.

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Hidden]

Yer pmd you.can just about focus of the tablets so if I go quiet for twelve hours I’ve collapsed on the bed.

Xxx

[Hidden in reply to Tiggerakafidgity]

Worried about u my friend.

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Hidden]

Yer me to

I’m watching ghost.omg it’s so beautiful.

My eyes are am unable to comprehend the fact I need to cry.

Omg I hate this I really fking do grrrrrrrrrrtr

[Hidden in reply to Tiggerakafidgity]

My friend,I care about u n i think it would be best that u go to sleep n awake to a new fresh day.

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Hidden]

But I want to fight what should be not would be.

I’m ok the antihistamines have made feel pretty softy.

You for the first time in about 5-6 yrs I’ve thought to my self what’s the point in going to sleep as what’s the point in getting up tomorrow as I’ve nothing to live for

[Hidden in reply to Tiggerakafidgity]

My friend I am beyond worried about u,u dont sound right n at times arent making sense.Please.please I beg of u stop torturing urself n get urself some sleep.

I am too far away to come help u otherwise I'd be by ur side right now n help u through this.

And...the point of getting up tomorrow is a new day n u have tons to live for.

Please my dear friend,for me...go to sleep n we can talk all day tomorrow.

Let ur mind rest.

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Hidden]

Omg where is every one.ah yes it’s Monday that took effort lol.

I’m just pottering being wobbly and banging in to things lol

[Agora1 in reply to Tiggerakafidgity]

Tigger, We're all here around you. You need to sleep the

effects of the medication now. Give your body and mind a little rest.

We will be here when you wake up. xx

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Agora1]

Hi ag

Thanks for your kind words.

I’m actually just zoning out on stuff just being and that’s it.

I’ll go to bed soon ok.

T

[Agora1 in reply to Tiggerakafidgity]

Don't want you walking around and bumping into things.

Keeping you safe my friend. xx

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Agora1]

Hi Ag

Thanks for the concern.its only lightly bumping on to things plus it’s kinda funny

[EllaAlexandra]

Sending you support.

[Tiggerakafidgity in reply to EllaAlexandra]

Thanks Ella

[Eliactida1955]

I hope things get better for you-I’m sorry you have this to deal with. I am not sure if this is the place to get help but I’m sure you have anxiety and depression from all this and I hope you have a therapist that you are talking to. This forum at least the one I’m in is for metastatic breast cancer so I’ve not seen this here but I’m sure you will get support. Take care and be strong as I see that’s it’s unfair what is happening to you. 🙏✝️