Need advice

[andiS]

I need some advice. My daughter who is in her twenties was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. She graduated college and is brilliant but, does not want to do anything with herself. She does see a Psychiatrist and has put her on medications but, I do not see any difference in her at all. Does anyone have any advice for me as to what the next steps could be I do not want to sit here and watch my daughter dwindle away it is killing me.

[Grateful71]

It's so difficult to see someone you love deeply suffer like this. Everyone needs something a little different but perhaps a good starting point is just to tell her you love her and that you will always be there for her. Sometimes knowing that you family want you to recover quickly can feel like more pressure. Maybe you could spend some time just chatting and being with her. It is possible to recover even if there are setbacks, might help to remind her that it's ok life is always up and down for everyone, she doesn't have to be perfect...none of us are 💛

[andiS in reply to Grateful71]

Thank you so much. She has really set back since my mother passed away two years ago she was really close to her.

[Reading_Rando]

As someone who has been in a position like your daughter's I think the best thing you can do is to not put too much pressure on her. Speaking for myself, when people did that, it made me feel worse for not living up to others expectations. I think like what Grateful71 said, the best thing you can do is talk with her and try and understand her feeling on her terms. You can also try to gently nudge her towards therapy (if shes not in it already). These are difficult times for everyone, talk with her, support her emotions and gently nudge her towards things the things you know are good for her and tell her it's ok to not be ok. Best wishes!

[andiS in reply to Reading_Rando]

Thanks so much that is great advice. She is already in therapy but, I don't see any change in her she just lays in bed and she is so talented a college graduate.

[BlueSky125]

Its a difficult situation, it’s good that she is working with someone. It’s shows that she open to getting help. Do you know if her depression is more constant over a longer period of time or just from time to time. Sometimes it could be the result of prolonged anxiety or triggered by a specific event. Two of the main therapies that are used are CBT and DBT. There’s a part of dbt that’s called distress tolerance that works on developing skills to deal with difficult thoughts and emotions in a more healthy way. This can a good starting point for more extreme anxiety and depression symptoms.

Here is the book I’ve used on dbt.

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) Paperback – Illustrated, September 1, 2019

by Matthew McKay (Author)

[andiS in reply to BlueSky125]

Thank you so much I will order that for her.

[Reading_Rando in reply to andiS]

I just want to second that, CBT was very helpful for me.

[lovetodance2018]

Thank you for sharing. I am so sorry your daughter is suffering. As someone who has suffered with depression, I know how hard it can be on our loved ones. They want to fix it, but unfortunately it takes time and the right treatment. Medication takes a while to work and it also needs to be the right one. It took me several different tries and almost a year to find the right one. Also counseling is necessary to work through the triggers for depression. My depression was chemical but also how I thought about myself. You see your daughter as a brilliant lady, but she might not see herself that way. I struggled with perfectionism and type A personality. Many people who have these personalities struggle with depression till they learn it is OK not to be perfect and it is ok to give ourselves breaks. Here is an article (bit.ly/3gNzOpx) you might find helpful. I will be praying for you mom. Stay strong, she will get better with time. Hugs and God Bless