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My depression has been crippling for me lately. I'm eating less, it's a little harder to fall asleep at night, and I've been having serious thoughts of cutting. And my sex drive is completely gone. It's to the point where I feel guilty for having sexual wants and needs. I feel like taking a knife and carving the word "Whore" into my back. Or carving the word "Monster" into my forehead. But of course I'm too much of a sensitive coward to ever actually hurt myself. I hate pain. But these thoughts are becoming more frequent.
Written by
MasterofDisaster3
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10 Replies
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I would recommend talking to someone you trust about these thoughts of self-harm. Do you have a therapist?
It sounds to me like you are turning your anger inwardly towards yourself. I too think a therapist could be of help to you. They would be able to guide you to more constructive ways of dealing with anger. But of course they can be on the expensive side, especially in the states (where I am writing from).
I was living near a school of psychology training & was able to get affordable help that way. Of course students lack experience but I found they made up for it in enthusiasm.
I was reading this morning on Thyroid UK how poor intake of essential nutrients sets off a cascade leading to depression in many. It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. I have learned much of this the hard way myself. I am hoping you will be smarter than me, by striving to eat wiser, especially when you are feeling down.
I recommend talking to someone - even just about anything. You don't need to let them know you have self-harm thoughts if you're not comfortable sharing, but do tell them you're in distress and you hope to distract yourself from your overwhelming thoughts.
Or do anything that you know you'd enjoy - like watching a movie, cooking, napping. Your thoughts will naturally subside once you start doing other activities.
Well it's been months since I felt this way but now these thoughts are coming back since I have to face the fact that I'm a total failure in life. I can't do anything right and I don't have the strength to get through anything. I don't know who I ak anymore or what I want to do with my life.
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Visions of Hurting Myself ***Major Trigger Warning***Message from the HU Admin team. This post contains information that could be upsetting.
I want Peace & Calmness Only!
Using alcohol to quiet severe anxiety.
Do I want to get better?
I am always depressed.
