uncertainty

[thepassionateflower]

i haven’t felt good in a really long time now. even if i have a good day, even if nothing bad or stressful happens, i still feel defeated. i still feel dread, fear, uncertainty, sadness, anger, numbness, pessimism, and acceptance that this is how it is right now. i’m trying my best to continue on with my life and to not let my troubles disrupt my life but it’s getting harder and harder as time passes. i am so tired of feeling permanently discontent and sad. i have immersed myself in friendships, new and old, made school my top priority (attendance could definitely be better but it could also be way worse), and i’m taking care of myself, for the most part.

does anyone else feel this way? is it seeming worse because of the bad state our world is in right now? is it ever going to genuinely get better? will i ever be blissful and in an incomparable romantic relationship again?

help.

[NewBeginnings2018]

I recently had a breakup. My fiancé ended our 8+ year relationship out of the blue last week. It has been very devastating for me. I often wonder if I’ll ever be able to love someone like that again. It has definitely damaged my self esteem like I wasn’t good enough even after 8+ years. I think the pandemic is not helping for many reasons.

[thepassionateflower in reply to NewBeginnings2018]

my ex ended things out of the blue a few months ago, too after being together for a long time. i think a part of me is still reeling and confused. my heart physically aches for him. he was my person.

i am so sorry for you ❤️ always here if you need anyone to talk to.

[JkBrauer]

Hello,

I am sorry that you are feeling so depressed. - Just a quick little suggestion; Maybe you should not worry about having a romantic relationship right now until you can straighten out your own self first... Just learn to be you. We cannot take on the world by ourselves. Do you have any family or friends who you can connect with? Make a plan with them that will help you and keep you accountable, encourage, and support you. - There is a wonderful free counseling phone number that has helped me in the past, that they can help you find the right direction for you. FOTF; 18002326459. They are excellent in helping you find the right direction for you.

[thepassionateflower in reply to JkBrauer]

hi! thank you so much for the suggestions! i definitely am not actively looking for a romantic relationship, however i am still madly in love with my ex and i’m hoping we are able to reconcile. he ended it out of the blue a few months ago after being together for a long time and i’m still learning to adjust to that new reality.

[kbrauer in reply to thepassionateflower]

Oh, I am sorry to hear that! Do you have family and/or fiends that you can lean on, have help you through this tough time of life?

[thepassionateflower in reply to kbrauer]

yes i do! but i think they’re thinking that i should be over it by now and not care four months later but considering it happened out of the blue, like less than 24 hours after promises about the future were made, and the fact that i found my person in him makes me hold on. i’m living my life but at the end of the day it still hurts so much.

[Hidden]

Your doing fine, good with acceptance, setting priorities. If you push yourself to attend that class you want to skip, you'll be proud of yourself. and soon expand into new activities/interests. I don't know if you'll ever marry the love of your life, but I do know that anyone who is committed to their priorities, involves close friendships in their lives, and has varied activities they enjoy is much more attractive than some one who doesn't have these qualities. Also, when your living a rich life, you'll meet a lot more people.