Mother of a teenager seeking help from other parents.

[motherofateen]

I am a mother of a teenage daughter, I am here seeking advice from other parents that can give me tools to help my daughter. Who is almost to the point she wants to unenroll from high school and get her GED. That is how bad her anxiety is. She also has depression. We are doing remote learning this year due to Covid, but she she still have anxiety and depression regarding school.

[BlackFemalePhenom]

Hi there. I am also the mother of a teen with anxiety that interferes with school. I am also a Mental Health therapist. It is really tough even when you know all the tools to help. She struggles to turn on the camera, speak in class, even answering questions in the chat is anxiety-provoking. She is stuck in the midset that she "CAN'T" do things because of her anxiety. She has a 504 accomodation and I still need to meet with the coordinator to adjust it so that she is not required to use the camera. She intends to go back to the classroom in about a month. She wants to go but the anxiety is really bad.

Does your daughter have 504 acomodation plan for her anxiety? are her teachers aware? What kind of support does she have at school? Is she taking medication for the anxiety and depression? Is she in therapy to learn coping skills?

Quitting HS and getting a GED is NOT easier!! It will cause an increase in her anxiety. She will still have to attend classes if she does not do well on the initial assessment. She will be concerned about judgment of others. And there are no special accomodations that I am aware of. People often believe it is the easier route but it is not.

I am looking for a group that she can attend as she feels better when she is around people who really understand. She often feels like she is the only one struggling with this. So I think in addition to her medication and therapy, we will try to add a group.

You are not alone. I hope this helps.

[motherofateen in reply to BlackFemalePhenom]

Yes to the meds. Although we have an apointment at the end of the month with an doctor that might find better meds for her. No she does not have a 504 plan. I asked about it her freshmen year and was kind of dismissed. Your teen and my teen stories almost line up the same. It is heart breaking for me to watch my daughter go through this. I think some of her teachers are having to do a lot of adjusting of their teaching ( with the camera, and mic for the remote learners ) The remote learners are either pushed to the side or kind of getting punished for being a remote learner. She really has a hard time with the mic and camera are required for certain classes. Espically when she breaks down and cries.

[lovetodance2018]

Thank you for reaching out. I am sorry your teen struggles with depression and anxiety. My daughter used to feel that she didn't have control of situations and struggled. Has your daughter been to counseling for her depression and anxiety? Have you talked to your doctor about medication? Often chemicals in the brain are off balanced and medication can help balance the chemicals which makes coping with life a little easier. Has she ever shared what she is anxious about? Teens, especially girls, have a really hard time with self-esteem and comparing themselves to others. She needs tools to help her learn to appreciate who she is. What helps is journaling. See if she can write down the things that bring her anxiety, then on the other side, list things that she wants to see in her life. Next, see if she can list the things she likes about herself and are good at. She may need some help getting the list together. If she speaks the things about herself that she appreciates over and over, then she believes them and it will help her feel better about herself and help with the anxiety and depression. Here is an article (bit.ly/2Sra3zO) you might find helpful. I will be praying for you and your daughter. Reach out anytime we are here for you. Hugs and God Bless

[motherofateen in reply to lovetodance2018]

My daughter used to feel that she didn't have control of situations and struggled. ,<===== My daughter feels the same way.

Has your daughter been to counseling for her depression and anxiety? ,=====Yes. She sees a lady that visits the High School. Started her Freshmen year. She is a Jr. Now.

Have you talked to your doctor about medication? ====== Yes, but I feel it needs adjusted, We see someone at the end of the Month that might be able to find the right fit for her.

Often chemicals in the brain are off balanced and medication can help balance the chemicals which makes coping with life a little easier. Has she ever shared what she is anxious about? Everything about school is a trigger point ( other than seeing her friends , but doing remote this year so she doesn't get to see her friends ) Being in a large crowd, Trying to teach her to drive was very hard. She has social anxiety.

Teens, especially girls, have a really hard time with self-esteem and comparing themselves to others. She needs tools to help her learn to appreciate who she is. What helps is journaling. See if she can write down the things that bring her anxiety, then on the other side, list things that she wants to see in her life. Next, see if she can list the things she likes about herself and are good at. She may need some help getting the list together. If she speaks the things about herself that she appreciates over and over, then she believes them and it will help her feel better about herself and help with the anxiety and depression. Here is an article (bit.ly/2Sra3zO) you might find helpful. I will be praying for you and your daughter. Reach out anytime we are here for you. Hugs and God Bless

Thank you for taking the time to respond. I know every little bit of advice will help.

[lovetodance2018]

How are things this week? I have been praying for you. Hugs

[motherofateen in reply to lovetodance2018]

We went ahead and unenrolled her from School. She made up her mind and I supported her decision. She will be doing online learning to study for her GED. Then take the test when she is ready. I know she is having some internal issues from her decision. But I can tell she is at peace with her decision. Thank you for asking.

[lovetodance2018 in reply to motherofateen]

It is great that you are supporting her. The good news is she is working toward her GED and will moved forward with her life. I know you will continue to be that encouragement and support she needs. Stay strong mom and take care of your needs too. Hugs and Blessings