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Alone with anxiety

8 Replies

I am new here. How do you deal with anxiety when alone?

8 Replies
c-mac profile image
c-mac

I get anxious when I'm left alone, caused by being left alone and ignored for whole days by my parents. These days I find that if I'm mindful enough when I'm alone I can immediately sit down with a journal and a pen and write out what I'm feeling, maybe work out what I'd like to do or work on. If I don't, then I start doing avoidant behaviors like eating ice cream, or other ways to get a cheap rush, that leave me feeling worse than before.

in reply to c-mac

Thanks for your reply c-mac. My problem is that I grew old waiting to resolve issues. My therapist of many years retired and left the state without providing continuity of care. No friends or family to count on. Alone with me is beyond scary.

c-mac profile image
c-mac in reply to

After bouncing around the country fueled by bipolar disorder, and after having run off all my friends through mania, I found myself without any friends or family in a massive city a five-hour flight from my home, and I was broke. Fortunately for me I had Al-anon, and the people there served as family until I could recover with medicine and therapy enough to start making money, make friends again, etc. That’s what groups like this are good for. I believe NAMI in the states has online support groups — I’d suggest trying out those or ones like it where you are. When we have nowhere else to turn, we find people like us, and build new connections.

in reply to c-mac

Thank you C-mac. I did look into NAMI and various other possibilities. I live in a town that just recently gained enough population to no longer be classified rural. However, we have not grown in areas of better services and opportunities. There are programs in nearby cities, but I am unable to get to them or afford the services. As I search for a therapist, I see more and more the comment that insurance gets in the way of being able to better attend to clients. Private pay seems to be the norm. I fail to understand unless the massive amount of attention to filing claims takes so much time. Still, that seems self-serving and well greedy. There is AA and Al-anon but these groups are not going to address my needs. My search continues.

c-mac profile image
c-mac in reply to

So, Al-Anon works for anyone related to or friends with anyone with an addiction, if that helps. NAMI has online mood disorder support groups -- I attended one once, and it was nice, though maybe not as impactful as being around people physically. There are lots of tele-therapy options these days, and insurance can sometimes cover them though they'd balk at an equivalent physical visit. I think since you're on medicine and it's not working that professional help is needed. Even a general practitioner if you can find no one else.

N-cole profile image
N-cole

Hey. I am learning and struggling on this as well. Try to avoid stressors. In my case this is usually my phone and social media. I find that reducing all screen time including TV is beneficial when I'm not well. And then try to he present in the moment. Try to unearth the real feelings behind your anxiety. Is there something that you have not been dealing with that surfaced when you let your guard down?If you can figure that out, even if it is something painful, just try to allow the thoughts even for 1 minute. It really helps to acknowledge and feel painful thoughts. Otherwise they fester until you break. Even if you cant figure out what's making you anxious, sometimes that also happens to me, try to enjoy the simple little things. Going on a walk in nature, spending time with your pet. Bake, clean, do something simple and perhaps even rewarding. Cleaning makes me feel like I did good because I can clearly see the progress. Baking, seeing the output of my effort, also makes me feel good. But if you don't have the energy for all that, also happens to me sometimes,give yourself all the self love you need. Nice hot bath. Nap. Wear nice comfy clothes and just relax and pamper yourself. It's always the simple things that help, in my experience.

in reply to N-cole

Thanks for your input N-cole. I do work at self soothing and it helps for a while. I know what my hurt , anger and pain is about but it is so toxic that I can not share if or even write it down.

N-cole profile image
N-cole in reply to

Trust me I can relate. I hope you are not ignoring the pain.It can be daunting I know . Meditation also helps. Those breathing and mindfulness exercises do wonders for a stressed out body and soul.

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