HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

[HopeforJustice]

Are you a parent estranged from your adult child? Or are you a son or daughter no longer wanting to talk to your mother? What happened? We are on this planet for only a short time, sounds so cliché I know. Place value and be grateful for those who have taken care of you. People are imperfect. Apologize or accept an apology. Let go of that weight you've been carrying. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. You got this!

[saracar]

Thanks. That is mean. People should have the right to do what works for them.

[HopeforJustice in reply to saracar]

This community site is to spread positivity and support. It is ideal to comment in a supportive way. Meaningless comments are not helpful. Purposeful comments show thought and care for this community. Please explain your comment in greater detail. I'm confused about your reply. What exactly is "mean?" Are you a teenager? I ask simply because young people are quick to judge without careful thought and supportive reason.

Take care

Hope

[saracar in reply to HopeforJustice]

No. You don’t know people’s stories or why they make their choices. Your original comment is extremely insensitive.

[HopeforJustice in reply to saracar]

You are right, I'm not a mind reader, I do not have super powers. There are 8 BILLION people on this Earth, how could I possibly know everyone's story? There are over 200 social health communities on this site and something for everyone. If my posting does not apply to you, than it's simple. Don't reply.

Find another like-minded community who shares in your negativity and hostility. Good luck trying to make other's feel bad. I'm still having a great day.

[saracar]

Ok. We can agree to disagree. I just know that making a statement like that sounds like you are saying that applies to everyone. Maybe it applies to some and some may likely agree with you. But for others it might not apply. And it’s a sensitive subject on a day like today. I know you didn’t mean any harm. It is a nice statement.

[HopeforJustice in reply to saracar]

On the contrary, I'm estranged from my mother. I am hurting and want to know how others are coping as to MY situation. Everyone's situation is unique and special in their own way. Please be supportive and thoughtful and avoid negative feedback. If something does not apply to you, than skip it. Or if you are so bothered by a posting, instead of lashing out with rude comments, inquire as to a deeper understanding of their experiences. Let's be supportive and non-judgmental even if you don't agree.

[saracar]

Okay. But that’s not what you said. You told everyone what to do. Look at your post. I am supportive. I’ve been in groups a very long time. I think if you reword it you can say what you are saying without saying what people should do. Does that make sense?

[Vanillaorchid in reply to saracar]

I think that you are misunderstanding each other. Just let it go. I used to be in a group called "Experience Project" and it was the best thing that had ever happened to me when I needed it the most. I met people who were so kind and thoughtful. People who were interesting and intelligent. Then after a few years, some younger people seemed to be so silly and negative, so that it became out of control. The administrators decided to close it down instead of trying to fix it. So now, I'm longing to find that same kind of thing with this forum. I hope that people can stay respectful and mature. At this point in time, we all need some help.

[saracar in reply to Vanillaorchid]

Yes. I am sorry. Someone tried to say something nice. I could have responded differently. Truth be told my mom is a perfectly nice person. Just not healthy for me. I do hope that people work things out where it is wanted by both sides. And as a person choosing no contact I will keep on working on forgiveness and being okay with my own choice so I don’t lash out. Sorry again!!

[Vanillaorchid in reply to saracar]

Good to hear back from you. Sometimes, our parents feel like we're not really their biological children. I am a free spirited type and my mother was the typical conservative Southern housewife. I was determined to be as different from her, as humanly possible. But this will be my first year of being without my mother on Mother's Day and it's sad. I would give anything to have one of her amazing Southern meals, with fried chicken, potato salad, butter beans, corn on the cob, cheese biscuits and of course, some kind of pie or cobbler. And she always put things in perspective for me when I was freaking out about some problem. I miss her ability to see the big picture and not focus on the stupidity of human nature and their typical atrocities. Anyway, we can choose to be whoever we want to be, no matter who our parents are. But they won't be around forever, so I would suggest that people try to find at least one thing that is admiral about them. Take care.

[saracar in reply to Vanillaorchid]

Yes. However, that doesn’t mean that relationship is healthy for me. But there are plenty of admirable things about her.