Depressed beyond belief

[diamond47m]

My 88 year old dad died September 22,2019 around 7 PM. That was 2 days ago and I feel dead. I knew it was going to happen, I thought I was prepared, but all I do is cry. I was the one who found him. I have lost every single family member except for my 2 grown kids. I feel so alone. I have few friends and my golden retriever Dusty but that's about it. Also since my dad died we can not stay in this rental house, the income just went from 4300 to 1100 and rent is 900 and the landlady doesn't care that daddy died and we lost that money, shes trying to force us out by October 1 with no where to go. My son only gets 770 a month and I have no job because I took care of daddy. Being a widow is hard enough and then losing the last family you have other than your 2 kids, it's all to much. How am I supposed to handle this?

[ciley]

a day at a time, you are in shock,this will change and it will not get worse,do the things that need doing~~sending you love for i feel you need it now ciley

[HopeandOptimism]

I am so so sorry for the loss of your beloved dad. We are NEVER ready to lose our parents no matter how well we think we are prepared. It is so painful. They are our connection to our past and there are so many things we miss when they are not here. You need time to grieve. You need time to adjust. You will find a new norm and you will feel your dad's presence around you. You will feel his strength and his love even though you cannot physically see him. There are many grief support groups that help with healing and restoration. Perhaps you can consider going. You can also contact your local churches who often provide support. It helps so much. I also pray that the landlord works with you while you figure out your next steps. Rely on those few friends who can give you love and support. Let your kids be there for you right now. It WILL get better. It is a hard journey but you will come out on the other side of it. You will be in my prayers.

[ciley]

you are in shock whether you knew or not, it actually protects you,as it won't get suddenly better, its a change you will adapt to, everyone has to, best of fortune to you