Meds

[Cam49]

I’m not getting the same support I was having before with my medication. I’m going to have to increase dosage again. At times I worry about this because I’m scared that I’ll end up the crazy person everyone knows. Does anyone else feel like this?

I did some digging into my childhood and I know where all this came from. At least I have the source. I just wish all that trauma didn’t happen. I could have been so different; Better.

I am never honest when a doctor, nurse, or even a questionnaire asks if I’ve ever considered suicide. I always fear what they’ll do to me if I say yes. Well, I have. In fact I’ve thought about it most of my life. But what stops me is my faith, my children, and I know it doesn’t fix anything! But I’ll always think about it.

Maybe some day there will be a cure for us all. Or at least a medication that doesn’t stop working on me.

For the first time I feel like I’ve got support through this. You all are my strength and you know what I’m living with. What a blessing!! Thank you

[Hidden]

I think we have all considered taking our lives however the hope that things will get better keeps us here. Things will get better. Need to believe that.

[Cam49 in reply to Hidden]

I do my best every day.

[Dolphin14]

You need to be honest in therapy and you need to work hard to get better.

I'm on a lot of meds I don't consider myself a crazy person. I consider myself someone who will do what I need to do to get better.

Glad you find the forum helpful. It is a blessing to have so much support and knowledge from people who understand.

Wishing you all the best

[Cam49 in reply to Dolphin14]

I’m being honest in therapy actually. This is my therapy. I felt secure enough in this group to say it. I have GAD. I’ve dealt with it most of my life. Paranoia is part of it. Insecure feelings and much much more. Like everyone else here, I am trying to understand my disorder and learn to function in my day to day. I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t working”hard” to be the best I can be. Please be careful how you word things. I’m sure you were trying to be helpful, but for me, it came across a bit accusingly.

Good luck to you in your journey.

[Dolphin14 in reply to Cam49]

wasn't meant to be that way

[Cam49 in reply to Dolphin14]

Probably wasn’t but I suffer insecurity as a symptom in my GAD. It’s miserable but I’m coping.

[Hidden]

Thank you for sharing. You are so brave and courageous! We are here for you.

[kevinloveslen]

Hello Cam49 ,

I am so sorry that you are going through a tough time right now with your medication. However, it was so refreshing to hear that you have faith and family that you depend on. I suffer from a severe pain syndrome that was so poorly treated in 2015 that my wife convinced me to go to the ED with suicidal ideation and pain crisis. It saved my life! The other thing that saved my life was my wife encouraging me to meditate on various scriptures in the Bible that provide messages of hope and peace (like Psalm 37, Psalm 91, Philippians 4). The more I meditated on God's Word, the less anxiety and fear I feel. I don't know if you have tried this, but it does work for me.

Please know that I am praying for you.

Kevin

[Cam49 in reply to kevinloveslen]

I appreciate all you’ve said and the prayer. Thank you for sharing about yourself. I’m so sorry that you suffer from pain. I’m praying for you as well.

My Venlafaxine has been increased and I’m hopeful it makes a difference. I wasn’t getting the full effects prior

and kinda went downhill for a while. I felt trapped because if I chose to end my life, I’d hurt my family and I fear wasting the gift of life I’ve been given. Where would I spend eternity.

Anyway, thank you for your kindness and I’m glad you have the support you do. God bless