Getting to know adult siblings - Anxiety and Depre...

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Getting to know adult siblings

kelpars21 profile image
12 Replies

Hi! I recently met my adult siblings after my father passed away last month. We are all eager to get to know one another, but this is new to me. I guess I'm worried that they may not like me or we won't get along well because we didn't grow up together and have not established a bond yet. Though I hope we do.

Does anyone have experience connecting with adult siblings?

Thanks!

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kelpars21 profile image
kelpars21
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12 Replies
Michdau1 profile image
Michdau1

I haven't had any experience with this but just wanted to say hi and thank you for sharing part of your story. I also want to wish you the best of luck XXX I am hunk it's good that u r all keen but are nervous too as it shows u care xxx

kelpars21 profile image
kelpars21 in reply toMichdau1

Hi there! And thank you for the support. ☺

I grew up with my siblings and have had a lifetime of struggling to like, and be liked by them. Kids fight, and the one I fought with most as a kid is the one I got along with best as an adult. I have had fallings out and reconciliations. Just get to know them first, worry about them liking you later.

kelpars21 profile image
kelpars21 in reply toPassingTheDuckTest

Thank you for sharing. I think you're right I should try to get to know them with out too many expectations. It's hard for me because I always worry about being liked and accepted whether it's family or strangers and I put more pressure on the situation than needed because of that.

PassingTheDuckTest profile image
PassingTheDuckTest in reply tokelpars21

The desire to be liked, and the failure to be liked by some is at the root of a lot of peoples depression. Mine is.

I don't have this but what a wonderful opportunity for you...go in with a positive outlook..I'm sorry for your father's passing....best wishes for you....

Dump trucks of love, peace, light, joy n hugs for you!!

kelpars21 profile image
kelpars21 in reply to

Thank you. You're right it is a great opportunity to form stronger bonds. Thank you for the kind words about my dad.

in reply tokelpars21

My pleasure..you may just make some real good friends along with being family..Oh I know all too well the feeling of saying goodbye to your mom and dad...lost my dad 40 years ago and my mom 30 years ago....ha...am I aging myself!

May you have a beautiful day!

Dump trucks filled with love, peace, light, joy n hugs for you!!

kelpars21 profile image
kelpars21 in reply to

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your parents. I imagine no matter how long it's been it's still difficult to deal with. I am still working out my feelings about losing my dad. We weren't close the majority of my life. He left me when I was nine years old and my mom remarried shortly after their divorce. For some unknown reason, he didn't really reach out to me and the siblings I share a mother with, until he became sick. We spent about 25 years apart prior to that. So I do have the heartbreak of losing him to death, but I've had a much longer heartbreak of not having him as a part of my life when he was physically able to be there. My emotions are confusing. But I try to take comfort in reminding myself that he did love me. He told me that when his disease got really bad and also that I'm not the only person who feels this way. I'm not the only person grieving the loss of an absent parent.

in reply tokelpars21

Oh I so understand..my parents divorced when I was 8 and my father never really bothered with us kids...I was sad in the fact that we'd never be able to be close...ya know what he loved me in the way that he could..from a far....it's my mother I miss so very much..she was my best friend...I know she's with me....I talk to her all the time...maybe talk to your dad....it helps me....

Dump trucks of love, peace,light, joy n hugs for you!!!

kenster1 profile image
kenster1

hi don't look at it that way go meet them with excitement.all of you have a lifetime of stories to tell each other they will be as nervous as you are as well.dont go in expecting to much in the beginning take it step by step get to each of them on an individual basis.i bet they are over the moon that they have a sister.

kelpars21 profile image
kelpars21 in reply tokenster1

Thanks for the support. In the last few days, we have tried to get together and spend time with each other, but so far it hasn't happened. I'm trying not to have any expectations so I don't take things personally when they don't show up to things or don't return messages. Although, it's disappointing I have to take it one day at a time and respect their space.

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