I can’t figure out why I am so unimportant

I don’t know why it bothers me that my Dad won’t talk to me. He and my Mom gave me to my Grandparents to raise when I was 2. So, I know they have never cared, but they used to act like they cared. My mom is dead, she’s been gone 15 years. My Grandmother recently died and I am having a really hard time with it. And I want to talk to my Dad, but he just won’t, and I don’t know what’s so unlovable about me. I learned a long time ago that just because someone is related to you doesn’t mean they like you. My husband is my family, and he is wonderful, but it still hurts. I was reading “Sharp Objects” and when the Mom told the daughter that she didn’t love her and told her why, ! Omg I was like, I wish my Dad would do that! Just tell me, it would hurt, but it would be such a relief.

[MrZee]

What’s sad is you want closure with your father. Your parents never gave you love nor closure. Pardon my candid words, but they were chickenshit.

You’re lucky to have had your Grandparents to have raised you. It sounds like you have a wonderful husband. And if you have or ever choose to have children, I bet you’d be a wonderful mother giving them so much love.

I understand your loss. I lost my mother two years ago. I have two miserable sisters that despise me because I choose not to play the victim in life. Yet I have a wonderful brother I’m quite close with.

Family is a strange bird especially from what our parents didn’t give us what we needed the most.

Though your father remains fearful of contact with you...you’re the stronger one and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you... you turned out okay.

Best,

MZj

[Mary-intussuception]

You're not unimportant.

You are Precious and Loved.

It's great that you have a loving husband, so now have a loving family of your own.

It's you're Dad who doesn't love himself and can't /doesn't know how to show his love for others. Perhaps all you can do for him / about him - for the time being - is pray. And leave it at that. Sort of 'off load' him and the upset he is causing you by his non-communication.

Sorry for your loss of your Mom, she must have died very young.

Now you're grief stricken with the loss of your dear Grandmother who was also Mom to you. Your Grandfather must be grief stricken too.

Hope you can comfort each other as you share happy memories of your lovely Grandmother-Mom and his Precious Wife.

So sorry for your loss. 🌹♡🌹♡🌹

xXx

[Fearoffear]

Sorry for the loss of your "Mom" recently. I understand where you are coming from completely. My grandmother adopted me and became my "Mom" and she was my best friend. She passed 8 years ago last November, sorry brought tears. But when my "Mom" passed my bio mom "sister" tried to take over the "Mom" roll and she refers to me to everyone as my mom and calls my kids her grandchildren. This pisses me off to no end and sets off my anxiety a blaze. My dad was never in my life until i was in my early 20's and he needed me more than I did him. To this day I will go months and sometimes a year without talking to him and when i do he says haven't talked to you in a while and I remind him the phone works both ways. I felt very unloved when i found out my situation, but I know my Mom really loved me to sacrifice herself to me to raise me. You are not unlovable and its your fathers loss to not have a relationship with you. Gentle hugs and I'm here if you need to talk.