Losing my battle

[carno90]

I'm losing my battle with depression. I'm at a point where I don't think I can win. Poor insurance has made it impossible to find sufficient help let alone some type of medication. I've tried, but to no avail. I'm about ready to give up.

[hooterificjoy]

Don't give up! I'm typing this message on the verge of tears, dizziness, headaches and feeling out of it. I suffer from anxiety and depression and recently having been trying new meds and feeling worse on top of it. I keep telling myself there is light at the end of the tunnel and you have to do the same. Exercising always helps me when I feel depressed or watching a funny video or movie.

[Dbsa100 in reply to hooterificjoy]

Hi Hooterificjoy. How are you. I am in fear of losing the battle too. It feels terrible inside, an unexplained fear and pain , ready to explode and cry and yell, but on the outside i still fighting to keep going and functioning .

how about your feelings. Is it depression with anxiety, how is it feeling.

I dont know how much longer i can continue. I ve been fighting and fighting and fighting. I am too exhausted and weary.

[Hidden]

I hear you but you’re reaching out so that’s a great thing - where about are you? Ontario has some great free resources that could help you or try herbal. You want the pain to go away...we all want the pain to go away - suicide is permanent, pain doesn’t have to be. Let’s see how we can help, ok?

[Dbsa100]

Hi Carno90. My nick is dbsa 100 ☺. Is it fun ? I am about to give up too. I ve been fighting depression over 20 yrs. Its getting harder and harder. Every single day and moment is so heavy and painful. The only thing that stillbackd me back is that i am still scared of it, going away forever. I am scared, if not i be going away forever to free myself from pain and panic and what is it, its strange and scary and depression. I am still fighting and struggling. Hold on my friend. Only people who ve been thru can understand the feeling and umderstand each other. Hold onb dont go yet. God bless.

[B4andafter]

Keep trying, don't give up. Your perspective on your situation is being skewed by your depression. If you can, go back to your doctor and let him/her know what's going on. It can be frustrating and you may have to try different medications to find the right one. Most antidepressants take at least 4-6 weeks to really work and all have some side effects that your body has to adjust to over that time so some people give up too soon. I don't know where you live but can you access any financial aid for medication and counselling? Do you have family members that can help you out with a small loan?

[Dbsa100]

Hi Carno90. I am checking on you. How are you. Hold on there my friend. Dont go. I am still here fighting and struggling. I hope i dont have to use the word struggle, just fight. We fight for our lives my friend . keep fighting. We are not alone. Keep going my friend. Your are my hope . i am your hope. We are each other ' s hopes. God bless. God loves us.

[sheila1kerry]

You must not give up. Medication is just one approach , others have huge success. I know this sounds crazy because when you are way down the last thing you feel able to do is exercise. It really does help though. I was put on Mirtazepan, at first i did not think they were doing anything, then after a couple of weeks i noticed a subtle shift in my mood. Just enough to get me moving. I started with a little yoga, gradually i started to improve. That was many years ago and i have been well since then.

Just don’t give up, you will find your answer.

Hoping you find peace. ❤️

[Dbsa100 in reply to sheila1kerry]

Hi Sheila. Tks for reply to Carno90. I am waiting for Carno to get back and read and chat, as i am in his position now, though i think i have better resources. But the important thing is to have emotional support, people who are willing to listen and talk.

[sheila1kerry]

Yes you are right. To have people who really understand is a huge help. I think the thing with exercise is that it releases feelgood chemicals into us. This in turn helps you to pull yourself back up to where you function again. The worst thing with depression is that you don’t want to do anything, this of course makes you feel worse. Try a little gentle yoga to.start with, even some simple stretching, you will be amazed as it starts to make you feel more positive.

Wishinhj you peace ❤️

[Dbsa100 in reply to sheila1kerry]

Thanks for reply. Did you win the battle. Your symptoms has not come back ? Did you feel pain and an intense unexplained very uncomfortable nervous feeling. Or just depression and loss of interest ?

[sheila1kerry]

I had awful depression plus i have agoraphobia , together they made for a nightmare. I just retreated from the world for a time. Once the depression lifted i was able to cope so much better. No i have stayed well but i am always aware of how terrible it was and i am determined to fight it. The things that i believe helped me sound so simple, vitamins and exercise. It has been proven that a lack of vitamin D can contribute to depression ( from a lack of sunlight) as i never went out this was probably part of my problem. It can be caused by a chemical imbalance so it makes sense to try to get the chemicals in the brain working properly.

I hope that you find your answer to this illness.

Wishing you well. ❤️

[Rachel2535]

Like those who have said it before don’t give up! I had depression for 25 years.....to the point where I was completely lost and alone. For 10 years no I have been free of this...so please there is hope! Getting to the root of your depression is important and there are a lot of counselors out there that can make a payment arrangement. Don’t give in! I am praying for you and thank you for writing that has been the best help for me after God. -Rachel