A very important question

[Marato]

Hello everyone, I hope everyone is doing alright

Thankfully, I’m on setraline and it is helping me now. Plus I’m using meditation apps which calm me down when I have bad thoughts,

My question is

I stopped connecting with my parents at 17, now I’m 21, and maybe speak to my parents about 2 times a year, my parents got saperated when I was 16. Is it natural?

Will I survive with out having parents

[Humankind-BE_BOTH]

Will you survive? Yes

Is it natural? unfortunately that is the wrong question to ask. you need to ask "is it healthier to have these people out of my life?".

Answer that question first and then take it from there

[Marato in reply to Humankind-BE_BOTH]

I know that they are my parents

But iv had so many issues with them

That now that I’m alone I’m much healthier

[Humankind-BE_BOTH in reply to Marato]

Okay then you can build from there!

at this point in your life you acknowledge it's healthier without them ... at some point in your life you may wish to reconnect rebuild reengage or just "re" something.

For now focus on you!

[JohnPB]

What is the reason(s) you do not have very much contact with your parents? If they are majorly dysfunctional limited contact is understandable.

I know someone who does not have any contact with anyone in her family

[Marato in reply to JohnPB]

Hello JohnPB

Basically

Iv always had a bad relationship with them. As we are Indians, they were extremely strict

Then we moved countries, and my mum and dad started screaming and hitting each other

And then, my mum just left one day with my verbally abusive dad, it was hard!

So I went to uni really far I don’t have to see them

Basically friends and family disowned me as apparently it was my fault that I didn’t save my parents marriage

So I’m all alone

Have no family

[JohnPB in reply to Marato]

Hi Marato, Sorry to hear about the violence in your family, and you being disowned. I am glad you are part of this online support group.