I fly in the sky up to heaven. I am dropped as there is no relief there for me, as I imagined, as I trusted in and hoped for, for them yes, but not for me.
I dive down into powerful waters below. I get caught in twisting whirling waves, turned and turned over and over again. I am struggling with angels waiting for me, surrounding me, showing that I can get through without being rescued. But I want to be rescued. It’s too difficult now.
I dream about someone betraying me and disrespecting me. I wake to find the same happening in this life. Tears fall on the branches, and in them I am part of this great tree of life. I make mistakes as I climb up the levels of cliffs of heaven.But I never feel I do enough of all the right things. So even when I’m exhausted from running from swimming from guessing from trying, my mind is split and I survive in black and white until I am ready to move into color.