I fly in the sky up to heaven. I am dropped as there is no relief there for me, as I imagined, as I trusted in and hoped for, for them yes, but not for me.
I dive down into powerful waters below. I get caught in twisting whirling waves, turned and turned over and over again. I am struggling with angels waiting for me, surrounding me, showing that I can get through without being rescued. But I want to be rescued. It’s too difficult now.
I dream about someone betraying me and disrespecting me. I wake to find the same happening in this life. Tears fall on the branches, and in them I am part of this great tree of life. I make mistakes as I climb up the levels of cliffs of heaven.But I never feel I do enough of all the right things. So even when I’m exhausted from running from swimming from guessing from trying, my mind is split and I survive in black and white until I am ready to move into color.
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Starrlight
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Depression is a tactic of deception, requiring a Divine interception.
As sincere hearts Bind the spirit of depression may you feel Heaven’s intercession, helping you to find peace where you, up to now, have struggled to find relief.
Thankfully, perfection isn’t the prescription to take. And, with a heart after God’s, grace & mercy after mistakes is what you get to do retakes.
May God hear & respond to your heart’s request, as you’ll surely be sufficiently refreshed, giving you a strength that will more than suffice along with the Mind of Christ.
For, tomorrow’s a new day where mercies are new every morning, joy comes after a time of mourning, & you are Loosed to bask in a Hope that’s seen a boost!
I’m letting some negativity others say take me down low. The things I’m thinking now are of my failures and not much hope today. I feel shattered, finished.
You mentioned a 2 key things in your reply to my post that actually shows you have the power within you to open a passageway to restore that hope & to feel whole again.
You mentioned “I’m letting...” and “...I’m thinking now are of my failures...”.
Criticism isn’t always easy to take, whether it’s the destructive kind or constructive kind which brings fitting & justified correction. But there are ways you can hear either kind & let it bring the best out of you instead of letting it get to you in negative ways. And, well... sometimes in the face of destructive criticism, a decision may need to be made if you want to be around people who haven’t yet learned how to treat others with genuine love.
And, truth is, we all have failures because we all make mistakes. But, none of us, not even you, “are” our failures. So know you are NOT a failure. I know it’s not easy to just stop thinking of them just because someone says so. Sometimes it’s the way you think of them that won’t bring you low but bring you higher, which happens when you determine where things went wrong, learn what can be done differently, & move forward with that wisdom. Not everything that failed in your life was your fault. And not everything that failed can be fixed now. But, those that you did have a hand in can be forgiven by God, & just as importantly, can be forgiven by 👉🏽you. For, it’s when we don’t forgive ourselves that we constantly beat ourselves up over mistakes of the past.
Maybe your hope has been low today but I pray it’ll soon be renewed. I decree depression will not beat you but you’ll defeat depression.
With that statement, you just used another Power that is too important to leave in your toolbox: the Power of Words. Yes, what others speak over you has a powerful effect but what you speak over yourself has an even more powerful effect because you either confirm or overturn what others speak over you! May you keep speaking good things over yourself!
Thank Him who created the human brain therefore He understands how and why it can misfire. Sometimes it can even cause us to hear voices. The worse and most dangerous are those which are always negative. I realize mental illness is real, but "voices" can come from a very dark place. Such voices NEVER encourage GOOD things. 😖 Yes, those voices always have an agenda...never ends well.
Linger in prayer for refreshment, comfort and protection. Do not rely on your own understanding. Nor those who may mislead you. Jesus is still the key, the loving king who truly cares. Also, those who have the mind of Christ are praying for you.
Something triggered me and it’s hard to get it out of my head. I am trying to put it in a positive perspective. It’s not working so far. I really rather not go on but that is really not a choice.
If you are going through, rejoice, for this is what the Lord has spoken. And it was counted to him, to me, to you as righteousness. (Believe)
Read verses 16-18 below, no matter what the enemy, depression, lack, inability to forgive oneself or others, know that the Lord God is fighting for you. Ask the Lord to help you in these areas.
This is my encouragement to you in the Lord Starrlight:
Do you know the Lord will kick down walls for you, He loves you so much. Do you know that heaven is watching, cheering you on to your deliverance, your healing, your wholeness. The Lord is compassionate, gracious, merciful, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and He is a deliverer, a healer, strong tower, a present help, a shield, a buckler, a protector. In him we live, move, and have our being. He knew exactly what you were going to do every time you “messed” up it is not a surprise. We are under grace, NO Condemnation. God will love you out of your situation. There are consequences to our actions sometimes but God is always there to show you how to handle the situation so it does not destroy you.
And in His word do we meditate day and night.
God wants you to know:
Psalms 18:16-18
16 He sent from above, he took me, he drew me out of many waters. 17 He delivered me from my strong enemy, and from them which hated me: for they were too strong for me. 18 They prevented me in the day of my calamity: but the LORD was my stay.
The battle is not yours it is God’s. Jesus loves you Starrlight. I am not just a child of God like you are, but we are servants, until you are able to retrain your mind, God has sent you help. I pray earnestly for you; I want the Lord to take your pain away but you have to release it to Him. You have to pray on everything, tell him how your feeling, that you do not think he will help you but His word says He is a present help in the time of need. Whenever we pray if we are dealing with unbelieve or doubt, you have to pray the scripture that gives the promise. God will uphold you with His righteous right hand. I just came out of prayer; I am believing for you, until your faith is increased. Read psalms 18 in entirety, it is the scripture God gave me when my struggles first began. God can do anything, but fail. The Saints of God, your brothers and sisters in Christ the Lord are praying for you. The Lords eyes are upon you and His ears are attentive to your cries. He will not fail you, He is incapable of failure. If you will only believe. Hold on Starrlight your change will come. Sending peace your way, and hugs. Be well, heaven is cheering you on. It is scriptural, not something I made up😊. And God has promised to pull you out of those turbulent waters because they are too strong for you, God is your stay. Greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world. I pray God give you a greater infilling of the Holy Spirit. In Christ Jesus name I pray.
Starrlight, I wish I could give you one big hug and we could share this weight together so it doesn't feel so heavy. In times like these I wish you feel warm and not alone. Count on me. I hope you feel better soon. 💕
We do the best we can with what we have. It's not perfect, but worrying about spending quality time with them already show your love and care. Do the best you can, but also take care of yourself. They'll remember all the good times. I'm sure!
Aww I so hope they do always remember. They are beautiful souls. I love them so. I do try my very best. I think I need a break as much as possible today. I feel like I’m getting sick physically too not just emotionally.
Get your rest. Kiddos want mom well so take it easy today. Make the time you spend with them quality, and do take time for yourself. The Lord God is not just watching over you but your children as well. Get your rest,
This is Darkshadow. Please realise that not everyone here who needs help benefits from or desires your faith in a god. You may find it a comfort but I would find it irritating and preaching where it is not asked for. We are here to get and give help. Let's do so without religion. This is not the place for it as many find it distasteful.You probably mean well, Needhelp123,but, speaking purely for myself, I find it patronising and unwelcome. If you need to spread your beliefs, do so on an appropriate site which asks for and expects it.
And are you not preaching your beliefs. I would say do not read what you find distasteful. You are right some may feel that way, and others may not. I do not know where you are located but the United States was founded on the basis of freedom of religion. I am sorry you find it distasteful or unwanted, but that is your right, but just do not hinder me. If you post something and I reply in a way that you find offensive then you have every right to say so, otherwise choose not to read what I post.
I am not preaching in any way. That is a term used for an unsolicited attempt to endocrinate others through the back door, as it were, but , yes, I will pay no attention to the religious remarks you make. Just remember that the free speech you advocate works two ways. All I'm saying is that others may well not find the comfort you do in your faith. Everyone here needs comfort so I suggest it should be given in a general way so that it can include everyone in need and be of help to them all. I wish you well.
I think that's the best decision, take your time to rest and get well. I hope you feel better soon. I hope you have some good rest this sunday and recharge for the week.
Now then beautiful one, what has happened, despite what you think you are doing a lot of the right things, take a step back and reassess things, rescue yourself , let others rescue themselves, you are part of the tree of life , you are the tree, be like an acorn and bloom into the oak tree, love you lots xxxx
Hey beautiful I’ve read your post again and I’m taking a step back and looking and I see the good but it’s tangled up in the bad that gets amplified by the illness so I will try focusing on positive but so far not working.
Thank you so much. I don’t know. I guess I need to talk. I guess what is most on my mind is the fact that my husband kids and myself are living with my parents, it’s just too expensive for us, but I would stay to help with my mom anyway, but the point is I’m tired of peoples rude responses when they find that out.
It makes me feel low. I’m trying to look at it in a positive way like this is okay how it is and I can try being understanding and loving towards myself in this situation.
Try not to share your business. I know people can be nosy. I stay with my daughter, and I have learned not to tell anyone it is none of their business. But if they do find out do not make excuses, extended family living. Many cultures live this way but it is not done as much in the US. But it is done, hence, mother daughter houses. Be thankful you have s roof over your head, give God thanks and ignore the haters. Be strong Starrlight.
Yes many people live like this just not as much in US. I don’t like to pretend or feel I have to hide it. It helps me to remember that we actually do work hard. And actually my mom is lucky to have me right now. And yes we are blessed to have a roof over our heads. I’m going to try not to worry about it as it is what it is.
Blimey most of my extended family live with each other, I think it’s the way of the world, I guess I am lucky as I live in social housing, so can afford it, do you live in US Xx
It takes time and also depends on your situation ....life is hard and can increase anxiety and depression very fast.
Pleeeease though : don’t feel like a failure. I know the feeling but it is again part of depression and not a real thing. You are here, you are sharing with us, you are helping others... you are not a failure, you are a fighter. Hang in there... with love and support and praying for you, me.
Yes, talk to yourself as you would do that for me, for example. Sometimes I need to talk loud to myself, the best thing is to do it when you walk( when not too many people who would stare . Be your gentle parent for yourself( we have those different sides like parent and child). Today you need this parent to be loving and gentle with you.
And get rid of this mean and judging voice in your head.
I am with you dear Star, I want to take this burden from you... and give you light and hope and strength.
Thank you Ellinaki. It’s so good to read you. I am thinking even if we suffer most of the time here that eventually we may get to go to a place where there’s not only relief but pure love, pure joy, pure peace.
You can never do enough of the right things, rest assured in the truth that the right thing, the righteous One, Jesus, gave His all so you don’t have to worry. It’s been paid in full!
All this talk of Heaven, God and Jesus leaves me cold. I do not accept these things as part of reality. I would ask you to remember that there are people who are at their lowest ebb who find no help whatsoever in responses of a religious nature.What of them? This should not be a site where you can push your own beliefs on to others who are suffering --probably more than you.
I was not referring to you specifically but to people in general who talk of religious beliefs as if they were facts. I have never found prayer either answered or beneficial no matter how desperate I felt and, believe me, I have been desperate and still am today.I think all those pitiable victims of our ferocious weather would agree if they could but they can't because no god saved them. I am very sorry for anyone suffering from mental problems whether anxiety, depression or both like me. I wish you well, Starrlight, and hope that you can rise above what afflicts you.xx.
Yes I agree some people seem to think they know it all for fact. I hold beliefs dear but cannot say they are fact. Those who think they’ve got it all figured out well I don’t let that bother me much. We are all here learning from everything and everyone. Thank you! 😃 I wish you well too Darkshadow and I wish everything good that you need will come to you.
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. Be your gentle parent for yourself( we have those different sides like parent and child). Today you need this parent to be loving and gentle with you. 
Broken heart and depression
Can’t take it 
Anxiety and Panic attacks and Depression are ruining my life 
Repressing my deepest needs = anxiety and depression 
