I can’t shake this depression

[Imhopeful]

I’m new here with feelings of sadness & almost desperation to feel normal. I’m a mom of 4 that’s recently divorced from a 15 year marriage. I just started to date again and my heart was broken again unexplainably by a man that I thought was a blessing after my horrible divorce. And that came to an end after only 3 months of everything going great and he disspeared. I don’t know why I keep getting hurt... I can admit that I’m very sad.

[RainneLim]

Hi. I don't know what it means to be a mom. I'm in my mid-20s, but I want to say this. You are amazing mother of 4. You did what you could with your previous marriage all the while taking care of your children.

A friend's mom is a mother of four and has divorced also. She is like a mother to me too, and I believe she is amazing. She told me this once while I was asking her about her struggles when she divorces her ex-husband.

"I found happiness within my children. They are what brings joy to my life even though they can irritate me. I don't date men to find happiness. I have it here with my kids. I am finding someone who can share this treasure with. And if I don't find someone, that sucks for them."

I laughed at this, but I hope that it brings comfort to you that you are not a lone. And that you have everything you need already in front of you. I am sorry that your previous marriage and relationship didn't work. But I truly believe that you'll find someone not just cause they'll really love you but also the treasure you have with your family.

[Imhopeful in reply to RainneLim]

Thank you Rainne Lim!! You words brought joy to my heart. Thank you for taking time to not only read my post but respond. I joined this forum because I don’t have anyone to talk

[RainneLim in reply to Imhopeful]

Hi. I am glad to help!

And yes. It's always hard to find someone you can talk to. I think it's even harder in person to talk to family or friends. There is something about reaching out online and being anonymous.

Feel free to message me anytime. Like I said, I am young and have a lot to learn about not just the world but my depression and anxiety also, but I really do hope I can help people out who is going through it like me.

[Hidden]

Hi Imhopeful,

I'm sorry you are feeling down right now. I have found that some men pull a disappearing act for no apparent reason. We try to analyze the situation. What did we do wrong? It is normal to question and wonder. Let him stay in the rearview mirror. I can guarantee you it's best that he is gone. Good riddance. You deserve better. Just remember that it is going to be okay.

I am a mother of three children and I divorced after 27 years of marriage.

Blessings!

[Imhopeful in reply to Hidden]

Thank you Delta1!! I hope it’s gets easier each day. I know I’m still at a fragile place from my divorce. I have to learn to be alone, which the process is new to me. Thanks for your reply

[Hidden in reply to Imhopeful]

One day at a time. I divorced almost three years ago and I have not been in a serious relationship since the divorce. I chat and I go out once in while. I enjoy my independence.

You are good enough. Always be proud of who you are. You are worthy of so much more.

[fauxartist]

It does seem like that happens sometimes when we just want to find someone who gets us, and we are comfortable with them....it's a tall order these days when social media seems to get in the way of real relationships on a long term basis. I would maybe do some group stuff with other like-minded people and just try to do things socially with other people who maybe play cards, or go to different venues....just be social for a while and not looking for a relationship.....it does help you get in touch with yourself and what you want from someone. I enjoyed being single that way for a while and it gave me more self confidence and I had fun too.

[Imhopeful in reply to fauxartist]

Yes I agree I do need to take time. Thanks for you encouragement and advice.

[Hidden]

I’m also not a mother, as I’m only 26 years old, but I just got out of a 10 year relationship & lost a baby at the hands of my abuser, & I just want you to know that we are all here for you. You have come to the right place. You matter, your happiness matters, & I believe you’ll find a man someday that will never disappear on you or your children. You’re a strong woman to go through all you have & manage to take care of your 4 children. My heart goes out to you. If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to reach out to me! <3

[Imhopeful in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much!!! I joined this group in hopes of an outlet. I’m truly happy to have so much support. It really means the world to me!! Thank you again!

[Sillysausage234]

Hiya and welcome,🙋🏻‍♂️

[chinaandback]

Hi there,

I'm sorry to hear of your divorce and recent relationship ending. I divorced after 14 years of marriage and the beginning was so painful. I just walked around crying all the time. Not even sure some days how I got up, took care of my child and got to work, but I did. I went back to church and joined a Divorce Care group there. If you are interested, you can google it. These groups are in most areas and it was such a help to me to begin to heal. If I can make a suggestion, take your time to heal. Focus on your well-being and your children. Dating too soon can be painful. It does get better with time. Keep reaching out to others. Wishing you peace and comfort!

[Hidden]

I can't shake this depression too