I’m new here ... Getting a Job

[Hobominded]

My whole family wants me to get a job, and seem to be very frustrated that I haven't yet. I'm so anxious about the thought of getting one, what if I can't show up because of depression and I get fired? What if I hate what I'm doing? The "what if"s could go on forever... I seem to do okay at stopping myself from having panic attacks now, but getting a job sounds like the scariest thing ever, having expectations from others and responsibility... it's hard to take those on when I know that I'm worthless. I don't know what to do and it's contributing to severe depression

[hypercat54]

Hi don't forget you might be crossing the road tomorrow and get run over by a car, the sky could fall in and so on. You are thinking ahead much too far and I think the fear is now much worse than the reality. The longer you leave it to the worse it will get.

Now deal with just one thing at a time. Buy a paper and look at the job pages and if you find anything suitable apply for it. Take it one step at a time and show your family you are looking then they will get off your back a bit.

Unless you are lucky enough to have plenty of money or have a partner with lots you are going to have to face the reality of work. I bet it won't seem anywhere near as bad once you eventually get a job. Work is part of being an adult and contributes towards your independence. Don't run before you can walk and don't think further than the next step. When your mind goes into overdrive distract yourself - wash the dishes, read a book, watch telly, whatever and keep doing it. It gets easier with time. x

[Hidden]

Hi Hobominded!

You’re not worthless! Worrying about “what if’s” or worrying about things that haven’t even happened is very anxiety-producing and self-sabotaging. If you get a job and start making money, not only will it improve your confidence and self-esteem, it will feel like freedom! There are only positive life experiences to be gained by getting a job. I think you’re worrying too much about it and you must have a fear of the unknown. If you find that you don’t like what you’re doing, just get another job! To me, working hard builds character. Facing your fears head on might be just what the doctor ordered! You can do it!!

[MrZee]

Hey Hobominded,

I totally get what you’re saying. Looking for a job is terrifying for me. I’m OCD and the “what ifs” eat me alive.

What I’ve done is gone on the Internet job search pages and submit applications. Who knows if I’ll hear from any of them. But it feels good to be productive taking action.

When I finally landed my job, the worry was eating at me that I’d never learn my job and I’d be fired for incompetence. But that didn’t happen. I learned the job and grew to love it. My employer ended up liking my work.

And all this came from my just applying for a job online. That’s where I took my first action.

Your fear is real and understandable. But opportunity awaits you and your talents out there.

Best

-MZ

[Hidden]

I can kinda speak to this. I just got a volunteering job at the huge pediatric hospital affiliated with Johns Hopkins. I was sooooo nervous. I've made mistakes but I put myself out there and I'm building a resume for college. You might hate it but you might love it. You might mess up but you might make your boss so proud. Silence your anxiety, and interrupt it. When you start feeling like you'll mess up ask yourself "What if I don't?" That is the ONLY drug free way to cure anxiety. Good luck! Put yourself out there and take a chance! Sending hugs!