High Anxiety

[aart2000]

I'm new here and have never had to deal with this kind of anxiety before. I have been in my new job for less than a year and my immediate supervisor is a nightmare. I'm a very quiet introverted person. I go about my daily tasks quietly. But I come off as being moody. She accused me of giving her a look that could kill the other day. I don't give "looks", it's just my face. I dread going to work when she is there. She brings gloom and doom and I would like to find a hole to hide in. When I try to approach her and see what I have done to offend, she walks away and says she doen't want to talk. There is no way to clear the air. On top of all this I'm buying my first house and am both excited and terrified at the same time. All the what if's are bouncing in my head. What if the neighbors are a nightmare. What if it's not the right house. What if I can't make the mortgage payments. I had a dream the other night where I was driving along a mountain road and simply drove off the cliff. I watched as the car slowly went nose down. I still get palpitations when I think of this. My anxiety is off the chart and making me ill, dizzy, heart palpitations and lethargic. I have no idea how to deal with this. I'm shaky and crying while I'm writing this. What's my first step? I live alone so have no one to talk to about this.

[CazO46]

Hi, I often find that people at work who exert power inappropriately or are a bit of bully tend to be be very unhappy people themselves. I know it's really hard ( I've been there with a bully for a manager) but don't take it personally. If it makes it easier try and think about the pain she must be on, happy people don't behave that way. It's a leap of faith buying a house but don't worry it will be fine . Everyone worries about not being able to pay their mortgage but we still take the risk... Otherwise you just pay the same amount in rent. If you are able to perhaps confide in a friend about your fears , we all have them. Just deal with one day at a time you don't have too look too far ahead. Deep breath you'll be ok, good luck X

[aart2000 in reply to CazO46]

Thanks, I do try to remember what I have to offer. It's hard when you are always looking over your shoulder and waiting for the hammer to fall :D.I would like to try Yoga or some other type of relaxation technique.

[CazO46 in reply to aart2000]

Yoga and mindfulness meditation could both be good for you with relaxation and reducing anxiety. Remember it's not you who has a problem, it's the other person, I find meditation can be good for helping us to deal with these emotions. Take care X

[Elaine1963]

Welcome to the Forum!

First stop, deep breaths

Look at how much you have accomplished. Bosses with drama usually have issues that are not dealing with.

Drink some chamomile and or lavender tea. You choose what you can change and what you can't. Respect the 'position' of your supervisor.

Do your job to the best of your ability remember you wouldn't be there if you couldn't.

Rest at night and find things that best redirect your thoughts. Music, ice and water, walk outside, and introduce yourself to the neighbors next door. 🦋

Deep breaths;

[aart2000 in reply to Elaine1963]

Thanks, I am in a very unique job and what I have to offer is not easy to come by. I've come to believe that everything my supervisor says to me is a reflection of her. She doesn't know how to deal with her problems so projects them onto me. I work in a very small business, only 4 of us including my supervisor, so it's impossible to avoid her. I am also a landscape artist and have not painted since all this started. I think I'll start a new painting and retreat into my art. I'm starting to feel better with your support.

[Forestina]

You are obviously talented. It would be lovely if you could put one of your landscapes on here.

[aart2000]

I would love to share my work. Thank you for asking but I have no idea how to add a photo. I could give you my web site, but don't know if it's allowed here. BTW, I went to YouTube and found a simple Yoga exercise for anxiety. It was just deep breathing with a few simple positions. I feel a lot better. I think I'll try this everyday after work. Couldn't hurt right?

[Elaine1963]

Nice about the yoga. I will give it a try.