I'm and at home mum caring for my son who is autistic and has severe anxiety disorder, and my husband is little help a lot of the time due to his problematic drinking. The thing is, I know I'm being selfish, but I just can't seem to get control of the feeling of despair at my daughter leaving. I'm managing to keep it under control around her, as I really want her to have an amazing experience, but I can't sleep more than a couple of hours because I'm crying in my sleep and wake myself with my asthma flaring up in panic. I know this is pathetic, but don't know how to pull myself together? I really need to keep stronger than this for my son.