New to this community

[jpga033072]

I just want to introduce myself and say hello to the community. I would be reading some of the posts and share some of my stories. I'm in my mid 40's with a great career, a wonderful daughter and a low key lifestyle. But lately I've been feeling depressed and unmotivated. i'm afraid i would succumb to the depression i experienced when i was in my late 20's. I know there is a lo of help out there and that is the main reason i'm reaching out to this forum.

I hope i can find good advice and i'm able to share some of my experiences with you as well.

Thank you

Sincerely

JP Gutierrez.

[Alaskca_Kid]

Welcome

[cbreslin in reply to Alaskca_Kid]

Welcome.. I'm new as well.

[Hidden]

Welcome ... I'm new to the community

[jpga033072]

Thank you all. I'm currently struggling with mostly depression and anxiety. in the morning i wake up and a multitude of negative thinking just comes to my head. what i call negative thinking is the constant feeling of not being good enough, not having enough energy to get through the day, not measuring up etc. etc. I feel useless at times yet I've have worked and grown my career for about twenty years now. I work in IT (Information Technology) and i have designed and deploy some very complex computer system designs using the latest cloud technology available. Yet, i don't consider myself good enough nor i feel like i deserve all the accolades I've been given even thought I've earned them with long hours and dedication.

I hope to find some sort of relieve to my constant feeling of not being good enough and my constant inability to tell myself that all i've done is due to my hard work and dedication and that i deserve it.

I think one of the main reasons that i feel less than adequate is not that is the now me but the child within that i denied for many years and now i don't know how to nurture him. My overwhelming feelings of a child that has been abandoned and who is not capable of taking care of himself. I've read a few books and it has help identify some of my feelings and i have learned a few techniques but still i think i'm far away from achieving any sort of relief. I haven't been able to travel for many many years and the thought of being outside of my comfort zone is overwhelming yet i have been able to do it to a certain degree and very seldom since i have to prepare myself for it.

I hope to be able to provide as well as to learn from each other and fight against this condition that serves us none.

I will write soon enough some of my other experiences and will post more on my condition. Thank you.