Single Mother: My son was diagnosed at... - CHADD's Adult ADH...

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Single Mother

BigRed2024 profile image
3 Replies

My son was diagnosed at age 4. The disorder is still very much new and I just dont understand a lot. I am hear to learn or connect with other single mothers.

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BigRed2024 profile image
BigRed2024
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3 Replies
mosaicmama profile image
mosaicmama

my kiddos got diagnosed at 5 and 7 for my younger one. It looks very different in each of them. Dad and I have our own challenges with ADHD ourselves and it looks different in us as well! It can show up so many different ways. I’ve developed a lot of work arounds that I didn’t even know I was doing in order to give myself order. Feel free to reach out.

Mamamichl profile image
Mamamichl

4 isquite an early diagnosis! Most doctors won’t even try until 6! Look up the YouTube channel “how to adhd”. You will know you’re in the right place when the lady says “hello brains”. She can teach you a lot. Also, “adhd_love” has taught me a lot.its not all about being in a relationship, but more about the conditions we have. My daughter was diagnosed at 8 about 1.5 years ago, and I was diagnosed around the same time. I realized her conditions were what I considered our family traits. Sleep stories and meditation apps like calm and loóna have been super beneficial as a parent. Not reacting to the outbursts has been hard but helpful. Coming to talk with her when regulated to process situations and cause/effect have been tremendous. Punishments have been horrible for us, but reward systems have been super beneficial.

If you do use a punishment, don’t do it in a heated moment, but do it in a processing situation “I notice you didn’t eat breakfast. Instead you were on your phone. It seems the phone is keeping you from your responsibilities of taking care of yourself. What should we do about this? Can we find something to keep this from happening in the future?” Kids with adhd usually are quite smart and come up with some off the wall, awesome solutions that neurotypical wouldn’t even think of. My stepkid threw away a classmates food once, and the solution they came up with was to give their lunch to the peer. It was surprising. We do make mistakes in the i pulsive moment, but we don’t mean to do many of the things we do and want to make it right.

ateacher profile image
ateacher

Hi and welcome. I am also a single mother of a wonderful, but challenging 12- year- old girl. She was diagnosed in the 4th grade, but I suspected that there was an issue years before that. How old is your son now? Middle school has been tough to get used to, but we are getting there and taking it one day at a time. I wish you all the best!

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