Did meds make a difference to a lifetime of unread books and clutter?

[ADDandMe]

Today’s musing.. have meds turned you around in these areas?

Clutter - I’ve always had too much stuff. Since starting meds I’ve began to purge in a big way. I’m loving it and don’t see an end to my motivation. I’m achieving more in a day than I used to in a month. So I’m encouraged. But I also have a little nagging voice in the back of my head that wonders if I’ll revert to my old chaotic ways and begin to accumulate again. What’s been your experience? I only started meds in August and feel I have more stamina, vision and stick-ability to see through these organising tasks.

Reading - I buy books and of the hundreds I’ve bought over my adult lifetime, I’ve genuinely read maybe 20 from cover to cover in the last 25 years. Actually that’s probably an exaggeration. Maybe 10, max. Of the 24 in my Audible library I’ve listened to 3 - and this tailed off in the final chapter. I thirst for knowledge. I read online a lot. Motivated by my latest hyperfocus. I guess it’s a classic inattentive adhd trait? Though I really want to have read so many books! I know they enrich our perspective on life and have so much to offer. Has anyone managed to settle to the task of starting and finishing the books they have accumulated? I’m wondering if it would be best to declutter my home first.. then I’ll have the mental space to focus on these. Or perhaps I should just get rid of them and leave space for library reads and Audible’s that won’t be a reminder of what I cannot achieve 🤔

[kshapiro]

Treating my ADHD hasn't improved my clutter or allowed me to read more.

But part of the reason that treating my ADHD didn't help me read more is that I already read A LOT even when I had totally unmanaged ADHD. Some things that allow me to read even in "ADHD mode": I listen to audiobooks on 1.5-2.5x speed while doing something "mindless" with my hands such as knitting or playing Minecraft. I also learned speed-reading techniques so that I read written books really quickly. It seems like sort of "overloading" my brain this way keeps me in hyperfocus so I don't get distracted.

If you're feeling more organized but can't stick with any book for a long time, another thing you can do is read just a bit at a time and take notes in on sheet of paper that you stick in the book as a bookmark. (That's what I do with more challenging works that I can't speed-read.) Then it's okay if you get distracted bc you can just read your notes and start back up again when you're motivated again. I find I can switch between reading bits of lots of books this way.

Other people with ADHD have told me that none of these work for them, but I figure it's worth trying at least.

But IDK, does it really matter that you haven't read all of the books that you own? Sometimes it's just nice to have lots of beautiful books and be able to browse them and read little bits at a time and that's not a "wrong" way to enjoy books, IMO.

[ADDandMe in reply to kshapiro]

Thanks. Love your response. Thanks for the tips. I do like taking notes and I have actually used the speed increase on those audibles I did finish - though it’s only now that you mention it, that I realise this was the case!

[STEM_Dad]

It depends on what the circumstances were at the time.

Since starting meds, I've become divorced and moved across the country (because my ex-wife moved, and I followed for the sake of co-parenting our kids).

I managed to purge a lot at the time of my move (which even included purging some of my own books, and a lot of the early childhood books that my kids had grown out of...I donated all I could do a school library, and the rest to a thrift store I supported back in my old home town).

Changing learned behavior is hard. My parents' tendencies are towards accumulating clutter, and so I'm the same. How much is ADHD, and how much is learned behavior? It's hard to say, but it's a combination of the two.

Part of the accumulation is also due to a scarcity mindset that I've developed (too many years earning a low wage, you learn to "make do" with what you have, but also tend to "pick up a few things [that you] might need" later).

I moved with very little...just what I could cram into and on top of my minivan. I've been acquiring odd bits of furniture over the last 15 months. My house has an assortment of old and new furniture. (Yeah, the house certainly looks like it belongs to a single dad who has ADHD! 😆)

As for books, during the first two years after my ADHD diagnosis and starting on meds, I binged more books than the previous decade...and that's saying something! A lot were ebooks or audiobooks from the library or Google Play Books.

• First, I was highly motivated and interested to learn all that I could about ADHD

• Then, I was trying to learn all that I could in my vain attempt to save my marriage from ending

• Also, I read/listened for my own enjoyment (and a bit of escapism)

This year, I've slowed way down on reading. I have a few newly acquired books from the last couple of years that I still haven't touched. I also found a few older books that I haven't finished.

~~~~~

I have found myself binging online information maybe twice as much as I did before I decided to seek my ADHD diagnosis. (Which was about 6 months before I started the actual diagnosis process.)

~~~~~

Since ADHD is due to an interest-based attention system, I think that I've always gone through spurts... Going from one obsession to another, and occasionally cycling back to previous interests.

Books have always been a family obsession, going back at least to my grandparents, and on to each of my kids, even to my first grandkids... We all like different subjects, but the majority of people in my family tree are obsessed with books. (Even the family members who don't seem to have any ADHD.)

• A couple of my aunts are in Facebook, and one can't seem to go a month without posting something about books. The other posts something about books once or twice a week! 📚

[STEM_Dad in reply to STEM_Dad]

To be honest, the clutter mostly accumulated during a year of post-divorce depression (which started after my move was finished, hit bottom on the one-year anniversary of the divorce, age dragged on for months after that). It was really bad for a few months, but has been gradually getting better. I'm finally tapering off the antidepressants.

My ability to complete a book also tanked with the depression. I am still having trouble more often than not unable to finish a book that I've started, even though I start with good intentions.

[ADDandMe]

It’s nice to find out how you related to this.

I think the absent-minded part of my ADHD brain (and perhaps these types of brains in general), prefer to hold on as a security mechanism. It no doubt exacerbates our inclination to lose track of things too. My dad has been searching for my school reports and the eulogy he wrote for my grandfather recently. The thing is, he had messaged that he’d found both recently but now can’t find them. He spoke on the phone to me for half an hour and his commentary on his movements and thought patterns were so revealing of where my genetics come from! My Dad keeps his belongings in a black hole methinks

Anyway, I digress. We seem similar on the book front. Slightly inconsistent- yet with a love of books. I did read a lot to my children and loved revisiting the same stories over and over as a child. I guess it was less for my inattentive mind to keep track of that way.

Haha, re your apartment. I’m sure it’s lovely. Eclectic looks are cool ;). Though I visited Sweden this summer and am totally going for the pared back neutrals vibe that was the gorgeous hotel where we stayed (Blique by Nobis: Stockholm 👌🏼).

Soon I may be living in my zero clutter Scandi style home reading through my whole mountain of books (fully medicated of course 😜). A girl can dream.

[NotAChevy]

Meds made it to where I’m finally able to read a whole book w/o a problem. What I have to do is keep a list of all the books I have to read, within the Goodreads app, and put the books in a closet or drawer to where they’re “out of sight, out of mind”. Then, I’m training myself to spend 20 min. a night, right before I go to sleep, reading. You’ll start to see slow progress, but you’re not committing to a large hunk of time, and you’re able to get through the books- one by one.

With the books not being within my daily line of sight, I don’t stress over all the books to read, but I can pull them out as I finish another one, and I’m slowing reading through my stack.

Like you, I love learning and reading, but I’ve had to modify the ways I do things in order to get anything done.

What do other people do?

[ADDandMe in reply to NotAChevy]

Thank you for sharing your experience and the strategy you use. Yes, setting the task to be tiny helps me just get started too

[Laviedamocha]

But for the fact I’ve just turned 46 and started my meds in early September this could have been written by me! I’m going a bit declutter crazy at the moment, filing organising and getting my life in order like I’ve been given a terminal diagnosis, just in case the medication stops working or they take it away! 😁 I really hope this is just the beginning of a calmer, more productive, easier and enjoyable life! Good luck!

[ADDandMe in reply to Laviedamocha]

Haha… yes, I feel that exact same sense of urgency. Like I take my meds and buckle in / ready for the next stint of nesting. When I’m done with a job, I still have capacity to start planning the next one in my head AND I can now see far enough down the road (with meds lighting the path) to assess whether it is going to contribute to my overall goal. Or whether I need to consider a different set of tasks that will be more efficient / successful.

[Clarabell26]

Yes and no. When I wanted to focus on decluttering or reading I just went with it. Not ideal as it’s time management and at 4am it’s not the best time but I tried to go with it when I could. It’s not a miracle and doesn’t always work but I tried to follow the urge so to speak. This weekend I cleared months of junk I’d kept stacked up in the space of hours cause I said to my husband I JUST HAVE TO and I went with it. Good luck with your journey. Everyone is different but I say if you can, just do it. If not, don’t let guilt overwhelm you, our brains are built different and that’s okay 👌🏼

[Mamamichl]

Declutterring has been big in my family since my partner started meds. My meds have t worked for me yet, but I’ve not been much of one to make a ton of clutter in my version of the condition.

As for the reading, we still have many books we haven’t read physically, but we found other means that fit us better in today’s society. Reading online like you say helps us. We also use library apps like hoopla and Libby. Get a list on your device going of the books you still want to read and get rid of the physical copies, since that seems to be what fits for you. You will be more likely to read them than the physical ones.we still keep a few of our physical ones for nostalgia or reference for academics, but most of our pleasure reading is also on electronic device for convenience purposes. It also takes up less space.

[ADDandMe in reply to Mamamichl]

Thanks for this. I didn’t realise Libby was a common library app. I use it in Scotland

Good idea re accessing digitally the ones I want to read

[Mamamichl in reply to ADDandMe]

I actually like hoopla better here in the USA. There’s no wait like Libby. You only have a limit of how many you can borrow each month.

[Sunidaye]

This is totally me 100%😅 Drives my family crazy.

[FredaN]

I used to get annoyed with the fact I couldn't concentrate reading books but, like you, I can read about all sorts online if I'm interested enough. And it can all kinds of weird random stuff or the things I've been obsessed with for decades.

I think since being diagnosed I've let go of beating myself up for not reading and decided it's just not for me. I thought it was something I should do, to improve myself, but I learn stuff all the time just in other ways. I prefer to be doing something creative/active at the same time as watching TV or listening to music. I think I can only concentrate when I have multiple things going on and reading just doesn't work for me. It's like mindfulness never works for me, but give me a piece of music with multiple layers to separate in my head and that is my form of mindfulness.

Could listening to Audible things at the same time as organising help? I don't know much about it and haven't tried it myself, but there was something I read about coloured overlays helping with reading in people with ADHD. I thought about trying it, but I think I've just accepted that I'm too restless for reading books, even on medication.

[Crasha]

wow! That is so much like me! I love  FredaN ’s suggestion about listening to Audible books whilst decluttering! That is the dream I’m 41 and only started Concerta XL 3 weeks ago. I see a huge improvement in my motivation and ‘get up and go’ and get so much more done. But at the same time I wonder are the drugs just making it worse in a way as I realise now I can get twice as much done in a day - I just want to do more! I also buy books, start a chapter and then never pick them up again. A little better with Audible, at least I finish a few more chapters but still don’t finish the books. One thing I noticed REALLY works for me is setting timers. Say 25mins timer followed by a 5-10mins break. This method is like a challenge to me and it really helps me stay focused for the 25mins and get soo much done in that time. I guess I need that sense of urgency and pressure on me in order to be super productive and focused. I’m going to try that with decluttering. Thanks for your post - helps me feel more ‘normal’ and knowing there are many people out there with brains wired just like mine really helps

[ADDandMe in reply to Crasha]

That’s so funny. I recall (pre-diagnosis) telling my friend that I set timers to do my chores. First I estimate how long a task might take me and then set the timer to beat that time. She looked at me like I had 2 heads and that was one moment when I realised my brain worked a bit differently 😂

My 17 year old daughter is the opposite ( though also ADHD I feel). She shuts down with that pressure and instead gets jobs done by listing the ones she has managed - no matter how small. For fun I bought her some cheesy kiddies stickers that say things like ‘Wow’ and ‘Great Job’ ⭐️

Def good to find what works for you and SOO helpful to understand we are not alone in the way we are wired 🧠

[Gettingittogether]

Decluttering isn't just a medication thing. It's more than the medication can (if you're fortunate and they work and you get a nice med with the right dose) help you slow down your mind enough to plan. And then you can use this better long-term thinking to take on clutter.

But clutter may be the last thing that changes as a result of good ADHD treatment. The meds helped with my mood, with getting up and going out, with planning, with finding ADHD groups, with getting to places on time ... and on and on ... my financial management is better.

I was in a coaching support group that was all about cleaning up clutter. One of the problems people struggled with was deciding what to keep and what to throw out and lots of little things tripped people up. Perfectionism of all things can block decluttering.

[Wasted71years]

I realized that many books I bought were impulse buys of something that sounded interesting, novel enough to bump up dopamine, but wouldn't have been enough of a compelling interest to really read through. This is similar to what happened to me with the myriad of projects that I dove into passionately and then left undone when the stimulation of newness wore off.

Therefore now that I understand my condition after seven decades and get help from medication, this is better. I am able to tamp down on impulses thus I only start things or buy things that have a more sustainable connection to me.

The medication gives me the motivation to declutter and to finish projects, but it doesn't deliver the skills. I never developed good organizational skills to clean, sort and store things neatly, but I can work on those now that I also have the strong motivation to clean, clear out and to finish up loose end projects or tasks.

Stimulants help me with focus and motivation, as well as a few seconds of time to get in front of impulses. It isn't a magic spell that fixed everything for me, but it allows me to work on skills and processes that will let me achieve my goals. Aware work on skills coupled with the improvement to my neurotransmitters is the helpful combination.

[ADDandMe in reply to Wasted71years]

This is so insightful! - thank you for making this very valid point. I will review my collection with this in mind. I get frustrated at this aspect of my ADHD - the fleeting nature of my interests - and I need to become more aware of the ones that should and could stand the test of time.

This is really helpful.

[SoTiredADHD]

I’ve been taking depression meds for many years and about 2+ years learned I’ve got ADD. Serious focus on ADD med only little over a year. I NEEEEEED to declutter and part of wants to but so much of me still has overwhelmed self hate mindset. I don’t know if meds can help me or not. I Keep trying tho. I have times where is seem to be focused, can see what I want and I do it. Other times I lack any desire to even face what needs to be done. Yet I want my house rid of all clutter. And I have a lot of it. Vicious cycle for me. Can I ask what meds you are taking?

[ADDandMe in reply to SoTiredADHD]

I’m on 10mg of short acting Ritalin, 4 times a day. I have a small edge of anxiety that is bearable - tried Elvanse but it didn’t help with my executive functioning, so I’m back on Ritalin again and I’ve purged so many belongings in the last 10 days alone that there’s barely an area of my house that has been untouched. Honestly- I’ve cleaned light fittings and skirting boards that I’ve never cleaned before. It’s exciting… but also I do worry it might not last!

I hope to try Concerta to see if that helps reduce the anxiety, whilst maintaining my productivity. Next review is at the end of November. So will see then.

What meds are you on?

[SoTiredADHD in reply to ADDandMe]

That’s amazing! Must feel sooooo good! I have a feeling we are from different counties based on “light fittings and skirting boards”.. I’m assuming those are same as light fixture (ceiling lights) and baseboards (wood trim bottom of wall) here in the USA. I love learning things of other countries. So interesting. Currently I’m on concerta have been for a while. It’s done well for me. I am quite a few meds since barreling depressions for many years. Thankful they have determined that I was actually struggling from ADD not just horrific depression. I was barely functioning prior to ADD meds. Anyway I’m on Concerta ER 36mg Wellbutrin (which boosts concerta and my Effexor) also abilify which helps them also. Just started Vyvanse about a month ago. Don’t really see a difference tho. I need soemthing to make me WANT to do things… like physically want to do them. I think of how and I want to do things but the physical push to actually DO is not there. Maybe it’s the lingering depression. I still get overwhelmed seeing all that inbred to face. Also hard emotional decisions. I think I have a bit of a hoarding mindset. But I’ve been working very slowly. Our daughter is graduating from high school this June and we will be having a very large party at our home. Mainly outside but still we need the house presentable. It’s “ok” but I want it better. World on my shoulders right now. Ugh I don’t want any of the stuff I have but yet I can’t just do away with it all. 17 years of my daughters memories toys clothing are in our “basement” lowest level, cellar, underground…. Not sure what you would call it or if they exist where you are. Many homes here don’t even have them. Lol. Ok well I’m rambling on. And as a typical person with ADD and time blindness, I realize I need to leave in 40 min for an appointment but I have not even begun to get ready! Ahhh but doesn’t everything take just 5 minutes!! Lol in my head it does! Bye from “Always late”!!!