I've known I had ADHD since a kid but wasn't educated. Found out what It meant 2 months ago.. 🤡

[Chino19]

I discovered a little kid I was diagnosed with ADHD. I also was near being a mute, I was taken to therapy and I began talking. But I had a huge stuttering issue. I went to therapy for this as well. But anyways I was told I had adhd by my mom. As a kid I had no idea what it was, and my mom was limited in resources because we were really poor in PR. So nothing was really done. I've struggled in so many things and was always the black sheep. School was rough, family relationship was like understanding time travel, and I was easily depressed. I've beat myself down my whole life. I never once processed I had adhd because I was unaware what it meant. So in my head it didn't mean anything, and had never any reason to think about it. But years passed by and I have really bad impulsive issues, 150% worse when it comes to money. I have so much debt. Even with a good job I'm living check to check, when any other person would have savings, no debt and money skills with my job in their hands.

2 moths ago I watched a channel purely by chance called How to ADHD. I connected so deeply with her videos.. Click after click after click of realizations.. Now I've watched videos, read articles, and listened to podcast..

But I keep having something naw at me..

I feel lazy and defeated almost always.

I still don't know where to start, or how, or what to do.. I feel like a sheep who needs a shepherd or I'm lost. But I want to work for myself, find a passion, develop my self..

But for the love of all that is my brain, what do I dooooo.???

[GatsbyCat]

Hello, Chino19

Welcome to the group. I can relate to what you're talking about. It's only been recently that I've been diagnosed with ADHD. Yes, I too have had it since childhood.

Sounds like you've been through so much in your life!! It's tough with ADHD to feel productive and like you're succeeding. I like Jessica McCabe's YouTube channel as well- she is usually super positive and helpful.

A few thing's that have helped me out include:

Meditation- 1st thing in the morning... Go to YouTube and type in Guided Meditation for Anxiety... (they don't list adhd... ) I like ones by The Mindful Movement

Get yourself in a calm receptive state

Excersize... Yes it works!! Helps your brain feel good- and helps us ADHD'ers too

Schedule/Plan your day- Really!!@#$%^ But for real, it helps sooooo much... even if it's just to accomplish one thing a day...

If you want to work for yourself, you'll need to uncover what you love... What do you like to do?? Do you like music? Do you like drawing?? What is it that if you could only do one thing- what would that one thing be???

Here's an excellent article from Psychology about entreprenuership and ADHD..

psychologytoday.com/us/blog...

Good luck to you!! Hope this helps you out!! Remember, you can DO IT and be happy and succeed!!! Best wishes on this amazing journey of life..

Best~

GatsbyCat

[Chino19 in reply to GatsbyCat]

First off thank you for responding. Now the concern I have with the above is the following.

I've tried to meditate, but I've never been able to sit still long enough and keep it consistent. I can't keep a routine up long enough.

This is the same with exercise. I know I should do it and want to but I can never get myself to do it

I've been playing with a list of daily to do, but I'm still just in a trial learning and seeing its effect.

The feeling that I know I should do something and yet go all day not doing it. Even simple things are just so massive to get done for some reason.

Any ideas

[Hidden in reply to Chino19]

Hi Chino19,

Your reply elicited a feeling within me that I refuse to articulate because I don't want to be banned.

[Chino19 in reply to Hidden]

Did I come across negatively? I'm sorry I had no anamosity and was really happy for the response.. Just explaining my train of thought..

[GatsbyCat in reply to Chino19]

Yes, when we're in the midst of figuring out what to do, it can all seem overwhelming!

Don't let that stop you. Seriously.

Pick 1 thing, just 1 and do it. Do not allow yourself to be sidetracked and finish 1 simple thing. You can do it!

[Chino19 in reply to GatsbyCat]

Thank you for your insight, and fir the encouragement. I'll work on my one thing, time management. Then I'll go from there. Thank you!

[WindowtotheStars in reply to Chino19]

So, I was placed on Wellbutrin and with that I began to have some mental clarity. I'm not advocating that you go on Wellbutrin but meds can be a good way to get out the door. I've not built up my tools to the point that I'm ready to commit to meditation. I recommend starting with a morning routine. Don't make it lengthy. Short and sweet. There are a ton of apps that offer help here including Brili and Sectograph. Build on your routine slowly.

If you go the meditation route small steps. Meditate for 5 minutes a day. You can do a walking meditation. An app I use is Insight Timer. Plenty of short and sweet meditations.

With exercise. Small steps as well. 5 minute walk. 10 minute walk. Etc. I started at 20 min but this was likely easier for me because I was at the therapeutic dose of my med that I had a leg up.

Most important, find a psychiatrist. One that understands ADHD.

If even bite-sized steps is too much for you, it could be there is some underlying depression.

I recommend watching these Jessica McCabe videos in particular:

youtu.be/Uo08uS904Rg(Not working as expected?)

youtu.be/hlObsAeFNVk(Not working as expected?)

Best of luck and don't give up.

[Chino19 in reply to WindowtotheStars]

Thank you so much for your insight. I watched those two before and it resonated with me alot. I might re-watch them just in case I passed over something..

Thank you I will look into the apps you suggested.

Also I will talk to a doctor in regards to seeing someone. I was leaning towards CBT but I'm still researching what other options are available. Though I'm afraid I'm falling into the hole of just doing research and not getting it done..