Using Humor

[adhd_positive]

Man, this battle with ADHD is not fun... nor funny... at all. Sometimes I catch myself in the process of emotional grinding that is so gritty, intense, and grave, that I have to tell myself to "lighten up!" or "ease up on the gas pedal... at least a bit!"

One thing that I've found helpful, that all the books and internet have said, is to use humor in the way you address or refer to your ADHD. I think this eases up the tension on my end, but also helps other people feel less scared or intense about my feelings I'm sharing. It makes me more approachable/less uncomfortable to be around, I guess ?

Here's my example. I call my ADHD "ADD-CEO". Why ? Because she ultimately always has the final say in matters! So... let's say I showed up late to a friend's house. I would say: "Sorry I'm late. My ADD-CEO... she just HAD to stop at the little flower shop on the way here! [Smile]"

In the above case, my friend from that point forward, would view me (and thus treat me) like a "regular, normal" person... I can imagine her saying: "Oh no worries, come on in!"

But on the other hand (which has happened to me soooo many times in the past, especially before I was diagnosed) was this:

I show up late to my friend's house, full of frustration, gritting my teeth. I ring the doorbell. My friend answers the door. "What's wrong ? You look so frazzled!"

I respond: "Look, I'm sorry I'm so late. AGAIN. My stupid ADHD. I hate this!" And then my friend feels sorry for me, and for the rest of the night, she treats me like a depressed person, being very reserved and not having a good time.

So, I know it's hard to make something funny out of what we in the tribe know all-too-well is deadly serious, but I got to a point where I said, I can't cry about this any more, so might as well laugh. And low-and-behold, it seems the experts were right... again.

[InItToWinIt]

ADD-CEO! Love it! I am a successful adult with ADD, parent of two children with ADD, and practitioner working with Executive Function Disorder (EFD) and ADD. I have always believed humor lightens the load. I use, what I call, an ADD version of self deprecating humor to work with my patients. As you said, "emotional grinding" is something I see and experience on a regular basis. My patients have poor Executive Functioning as a result of EFD, post concussion syndrome, or brain injury. My ADD has helped me understand some of what they are going through. I joke about my short comings which they can identify with, and therefore, consequently build a rapport and trust. This enables me to assess their needs more accurately so I can help them with coping skills.

AB, MS.Ed, Cbis

[randyj302]

adhd_positive,

Thank you for the post. It was an easy read and intelligible. I want to use this technique.