I wish I would have joined this years ago!

[Jordysmom]

Hello Moms! I’m very excited to have stumbled upon this site. My son is 11 years old and was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 4. Needless to say it’s been a long rough road! We are at the phase where he is struggling so bad in school that I’m just waking up and realizing that he needs a specialized more supportive learning environment that will allow him to be creative and learn the way he needs to learn! Public school is not the answer.

I always knew my son was different and not just because of his diagnosis (which is more the norm nowadays) but just different. I feel so much GUILT that I ignored his need for a different school environment and because of it I feel I have failed him by watching him drown in his 5th grade class.

My question or struggle is.. if I place him in a school with other children with learning disabilities, is this going to stifle his growth? It sounds horrible to say and now write but it’s really a fart of mine. 6th grade is a critical time in a child’s life and you only get one shot to get it right! Any thoughts or advice?

[cinvela12]

Hi! Four is a young age to identify ADHD. What did you notice that made you feel he was different? I’m trying to figure out my four year old. Maybe Montessori or homeschooling are options?? Best

[Jordysmom in reply to cinvela12]

He was always overly energetic, extreme tantrums and he demonstrated very unsafe behaviors when he would become emotional. He couldn’t sit through any structured activity and he was very defiant. At 4 I was concerned about his safety and so I took him to Kennedy Krieger. I hated the experience! I waited a while to see if his behaviors would subside and they didn’t. I took him to another clinic for an evaluation and received the diagnosis. Once he started school it was evident that he had little to no focus and couldn’t sit still to follow basic rules (stay on the carpet for lesson, keeping hands to self etc.) and these behaviors just got worse and worse. That’s when medication came into the picture and he has been on methylphenidate ever since. What a difference it made for him! I was happy to see the relief of his face to be able to accomplish so much more being on the medication. I could literally see him excited about competing tasks. Having great days in school! As he got older his dosage changed but keeping up in the higher grades became a struggle and not being able to move about and be creative is a flaw of our public school system. I believe some kids learn differently and you must pay attention to hose sighns or else you will miss it!

[chicagodad]

Hello. I would receommmend that your son’s doctor has input in the school decision. That’s a tough one to shoulder on your own. Best of luck!!

[anirush]

I have fought against putting my younger grandson in that kind of environment for the same reason, so afraid he will be with kids that are in worse shape than him. He has an IEP and lots of support in public school although he still struggles.

Funny thing is his two best friends at school also have ADHD.

[AngelamarieQ]

Jordysmom, do you have a good public school district? If so, have them do the psychoeducational testing and provide the 504 plan and IEP. You must have the doctor's diagnosis letter requesting the school accommodations based on his ADHD diagnosis and school performance/behavior. This record and protocol will travel with him into middle school and HS. Thus, it is important in order to help him succeed academically. Nevertheless, you must try counseling outside the school like Cognitive behavioral therapy or neurofeedback, high protein diets and lots of structure at home.

If your school district is not good, you have to do your research in order to find a good alternative school, or, homeschool with the help of other parents or tutors. Most private school don't offer much help with learning disabilities, still, they can accommodate your son with some of the strategies used in the 504 plan.

Check Dr. Amen clinics and watch youtube videos regarding the research and work of Dr. Amen and Dr. Russel Barkley. Your son might need other supplements or change his medication. Good luck!

[Jordysmom in reply to AngelamarieQ]

Thanks for the feedback. Jordan has had an IEP since 1st grade. His behavior in School stopped being an issue when he was in the 1st grade.

Funny thing is, I am Clinical therapist, so unlike a lot of parents I am very connected to resources and clinical services for my son. He has been followed by a psychiatrist for many many years. It’s actually much harder to be on this side of the fence!

The public schools in my area are good but implementation of his IEP can only be so much. A teacher that has 25 student in her classroom and probably 3 or 4 students with IEPs, it’s only so much that she can do in that environment. One on one support is almost impossible. I’m actually looking into middle schools in my area that specialize in learning disabilities and ADHD. They are expensive but academically I think it is the best placement for my son at this time.

[EGCieri]

We’re struggling with a similar issue. 13 year old son in a very good school district. He has an IEP but he just can’t connect with the way they teach. He really struggles with reading, so many times will shut down on any reading. He doesn’t want to use AT since he will be different. We’re strongly considering an LD school next year. I’ve heard really good things about two schools in our area, but still helstitant.

[Jordysmom in reply to EGCieri]

I now know that it’s a good consideration! Schools that specialize in children with learning disabilities create a pathway for children to have individualized learning plans and just an IEP. What I like the most is that all of the professionals and teachers in these schools are qualified and equipped to work with children like ours! What area do you live in? We are in Baltimore, Maryland. Here there are only about 5 schools to choose from.

[EGCieri]

We live in the Phila area- we’re considering Delaware Valley Friends in Paoli and AIM Academy.