Going Downhill

Made a fool of my self yesterday. We went to our reading group, though I hadn't read the book. The discussion turned into one about madness and I just couldn't cope with it. Left the room in tears. Everyone was so kind afterwards, they all know I get depression but I cannot handle sympathy. It makes me cry even more. I don't want pity I want to feel stable. Going back to doctor's if I can get in ,,the pills don't seem to be working and I just feel I'm going nowhere. Sorry it's a moan again but I don't feel very positive right now. Regards Lorna

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  • Ah Lorna, all I can say is "hang on in there". I was in a completely desperate abyss on Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday. I was in a living hell. I am levelling out a bit now and have got some coping mechanisms back though I am realistic and do know I could be going through the same thing again very soon but all you can do is keep trying to get the help you need with it.

    Yes it's a good idea to go back to the doctors and yes do understand with depression there will be very dark days and there will be better days.

    Hugs, Gemma X

  • Hi Lorna sorry your feeling vulnerable. I would pay a visit to your GP and have

    A chat with him. I think with Depression Medication helps but it's just a part of the

    Solution and there are other things that can help as well.

    Have you had any CBT or. Therapy Lorna ? But dont give up hope, there is help

    It's just a matter of finding one that suits you.

    Hannah x

  • I can be very shirky and I can loose my temper at the turn of a coin, today I have just returned from my final visit of our old home before transfer tomorrow. My depression was not helped by the letting agent not doing a total check of the property last night and when they contacted us my mood became more dark and I lost my temper. I am not violent and really the property is not mine anymore, it was just me feeling raw because of my disability and how I have been treated in the past. Of course I lost my temper with Hazel as I had to move on parking on a main road, she could not find me and it took twenty mins to find each other. So I ranted on and on for fifty miles to home.

    The house had been LET for two years or so and it was looking its age, we just felt so sad as it was our final visit and it had been in our family for so long. It felt I was having problems letting go and really it is not my problem anymore, I suppose that is what happens when you have lived in a place for thirty years

    BOB

  • Hi Bob I'm sure that was natural to be emotional. Make sure and apologise

    To poor Hazel, I'm sure she knows that you were sad. Take it easy for

    Rest of day and be kind to yourself .

    Hannah x

  • Hi I get where you are coming from I got upset at the school gates this morning when dropping off my kids. I tried to hurry past everyone and get home to cry but people saw me and asked if I was ok. I am ashamed really and like you I desperately want to just feel stable. I hate it, one day I feel ok, the next really tearful and incredibly low and then the next day happy again. I feel like my head is going to explode thinking about it all. Today is a really bad day and I feel exhausted with the fight of trying to be normal and get on with doing the usual jobs. I hope that your pills start working. I have been on and off anti depressants for a long time and have been off them now for nearly a year. I feel like if it gets worse I am going to have to go back to the doctors but maybe it will pass again. Fingers crossed. Good luck to you.

  • Thanks, I went back to the GP this afternoon and have had my pills increased. Hopefully this will help. She told me not to try to keep doing everything as if I am okay but to chill out . This is easier for me as I'm retired but I realise that if you have children it is hard. I tried to do without pills, managed for a year but started going downhill again. I hope you find things easier very soon. Regards Lorna

  • Hi, Good you need to sort out your meds. Lov jue1

  • Thanks, I'm sitting here doing nothing in particular , waiting to watch Time Team. Hopefully the pills will help. Dr decided I'm not ready for CBT yet , will save it for future. Regards Lorna

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