hello. new on here. dont know where to start but i will give it a go. i have been suffering from depression and anxiety for many years. there is so much going on in my mind. feelings of guilt all the time and that i dont deserve to live and feeling so sure that other people think the same that they just want me to evaporate. dont know of what bits of my thoughts are right and whats the depression. i feel so low especially when i wake up and so scared of life. i withdraw from everyone cant cope with even opening a tin of soup sometimes or doing the dishes without crying. i really hate myself. everything with going where people are make me so anxous and ill. i have been on so many different pills and had lots of therapy but nothing has worked. if i didnt have my animals especially my dogs i would just give up. i am so thankfull for what ive got and know there are people worse of and i feel guilty for feeling so low. the past hurts so much and comes out in my dreams then wake up feeling low and really anxous. just dont know how to stop feeling like this. i have had ambalance called for me alot because of self harming and taking to much pills while bingedrinking and ended up in a cell a few times and that makes me more guilty for the trouble i cause. thanks for reading.