medicated or unmedicated madness ???

[hsittreated]

Lost going round and round and down. I have had manic depression since about age 14 am 51 now and diagnosed about 15 years ago, I give up. All through this time Ive been medicated sectioned and endured ECT against my wishes been restrained chemically

coshed humiliated accused of attention seeking and told it was all down to my disordered personality. , when I was

diagnosed and prescribed lithium amongst other things, I did eventually feel alot more settled and although not

100% , 100% better than I ever did, After a few years and gaining several stone In weight I had my medication

changed and now its gone all wrong Ive stopped taking my pills and im not sure I can keep on keeping on.

Taking my dog for 3am walks to beach is my only sanctuary. what can I do, medicated or unmedicated madness is eating away at my will to be bothered anymore

[Gambit62]

Really sorry that you are feeling like this.

I don't think it helps when you have what is a medical condition but past experience really leaves you distrusting the people that should be helping you - makes it very difficult to be open.

I was chatting to a retired GP whose son has bipolar yesterday and he said that his son is now attending Recovery College Courses run by their local mental health trust (St. George's. London). He said that his son is finding it more helpful than the drugs he has had in the past - may be you could ask if there is something similar in your area.

[hsittreated in reply to Gambit62]

Thankyou for your concern Ive started taking antipsycotics [spelt ?] again but not as many, when I read my post again just now I remembered how I felt but ive since got back to falling over and getting back up again which is a positive thing,I will have an enquire about what you said and thanks again.....

[Gambit62 in reply to hsittreated]

glad that you are feeling better. hope that you do have access in your area

PS anti-psychotics, - so just short of an h