what about surrogacy?Need ur advice - Women's Health

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what about surrogacy?Need ur advice

LauraBisoD profile image
11 Replies

Dear women, I so need your advice. Is here someone who did surrogacy?

On these days I heard about it at first. And I want to try it. Nowadays it is very actually for me to find as much information as possible.

I have a difficult family situation. We really want to have a baby. But only adoption or surrogate motherhood is possible.My husband categorically does not want to adopt the child. And surrogacy is my the only hope.

The husband is much younger than me and insists on the child.

It means only in this way I can save my family.

I'm very depressed because of it. I will be very grateful if someone will share their experiences.

In what clinic did you do it? In what way is possible child's registration?

How to could choose a surrogate mom?

thank you in advance

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LauraBisoD profile image
LauraBisoD
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11 Replies
Tw1986 profile image
Tw1986

Hi I read your last post and now have read this one, i can't help but comment I mean I may be wrong but this is a forum on ivf people are trying all they can to get pregnant, I personally think your posts should go somewhere else! Also I really don't think it's all about your "body" it seems to me that you just don't want a child and the only reason you would is for your husband! Really don't you think that you both clearly want different things you have to be physically and mentally ready for a child it's not just a thing that you drop once you've pleased your husband. Sorry but your posts have got my back up a bit

LauraBisoD profile image
LauraBisoD in reply to Tw1986

Hi!

Really I am struck by your answer.

I'm here with a significant problem. Does it matter is it physical or mental?

You so confident talk about women who can not get pregnant. There's too much light shining on this.

I really never wanted a child. However, if you think about it, at my 36 age I did not get pregnant, although there were many situations that did it possible. If you are so interested I suspected I may have issues with female system. That's why I so calmly perceive information about need for which says I have fertility issues for surrogate motherhood. Whenever possible, I try not to visit the doctors. Certanly you must feel yourself normaly.

And itis enough.

Now I have a difficult family situation and I'm looking for advice and support. My life is just awful! I do not want to mix it up!

I'm only trying to find out possible information in my case and then I'll go to the doctors in the last resort.

danysh13 profile image
danysh13 in reply to LauraBisoD

Hi again, just found your new topic. well, I'm doing surrogacy in ukraine, I have already mentioned this before.

we don't want to put a blame on you but your situation is weird a bit. You have never checked your health but you want to apply for surrogacy, you don't want to have a child but you looking for a surrogacy. Is it all because of your husband?

answering your question about child's registration.. according to ukraininan legislation a baby has to be genetically related to the father. The DNA test should be performed in order to confirm this relation, in addition he must be there during the whole process of getting the travel documents for a future baby.

And you can't choose a surrogate, it's forbidden there, due to clinic's rule you will have an opportunity to see her after 12 week's term(a pregnancy)

LauraBisoD profile image
LauraBisoD in reply to danysh13

Hi!

Yes, firstly its because of my husband. He really wants a child but I have never thought about it seriously. I tell about my opinion before..

What is about health checking.. I don't trust doctors. And try to avoid visitings to them.

Now I have serious doubts that I can become pregnant according to my health. I really don`t want it happens by my own. But during all my life I have never had any situating connecting with pregnancy. By the way, I am very mature.

Must a husband be there in Ukraine during all surrogacy process?It is too long..

Hmm.. in what way a surrogacy mom must be chosen?We exactly must know who will be pregnant with our child.

Thank you for a reply

magilyn profile image
magilyn

Hi!

I wrote about it in our previous conversation. However, once for this theme appeared a separate topic, this information can be useful for someone else . My good friend did a surrogacy in the Kiev clinic BioTexCom. It is a branch of a British company. She is quite content. Now her baby is a year old. She is healthy and beautiful girl.

However, you must be more serious with this venture. Surrogacy isn't for just anyone.My friend is diagnosed with PCOS. She tried to treate for it during many years. And she could not get pregnant by herself. As soon as they arrived to a clinic in Kyiv she and her husband passed a lot of tests and also she must get a doctor's note she cann`t to become pregnant. These are serious things. And every good clinic will follow it.

Surrogacy mom is chosen by the clinic. Professionals must decide which woman is more suitable from medicine point of view. You can see surrogacy mother only at the end of a pregnancy.

I cann`t tell details about a registration of a child. But as I know my friends had any problems with this

LauraBisoD profile image
LauraBisoD in reply to magilyn

Hi, Magylin!

Thanks for your reply. It`s very interesting for me.

Do you know your friend did surrogacy with donor egg? I am interesting what treatment she needs and also what environment is in a clinic. It means that I must stay there for some time and I want to care about it.

Okay, I understand about surrogacy mom.There is a sense in this rule. But maybe can we see some information about here before the procedure? It`s also important.

How many time you friends fly to a Kyiv?

Tomorrow I connected with a manager of this clinic. But I want to know details from real people. Because clinic worker can say everything and it is not a fact they have a same in real life

Thaks!

lucy561 profile image
lucy561

I also firmly believe I have no right to create a child and make the decision for that unborn child that they will never know their genetic identity. Identity is important to us as human beings, and some of that is our knowledge of genetics. In some cases of adoption, the lack of this knowledge is unavoidable. But never should I be making that choice for the child. My sperm donor is open ID, so that the child can make their own choice at age 18 whether they would like to receive contact information and contact them. And I would support whatever decision they make -- it's their choice, not mine. In fact for various reasons (partly related to my own background/experiences) I actually have enough information on my sperm donor that I could just make a few phone calls and find out who he is -- I would never do this as I respect the ethics of the process -- but it has given me huge comfort that if he happened to "disappear" and the sperm bank lost track of him 18 years from now, he could still be found. I also chose specific characteristics (older, in a long-term relationship) that increased the likelihood that he had truly thought about his open ID commitment and would stick to it.

LauraBisoD profile image
LauraBisoD in reply to lucy561

Hi!

It`s very interesting,Luci.

But what does matter to my situation? I am looking for real advice and stories about surrogacy. Because it`s actually and important!

Also I need using the sperm of my husband for this procedure.

Do you have surrogacy experience with donor sperm?

Thanks

Dyna321 profile image
Dyna321

Hope you all have a great weekend! Tomorrow is my wedding anniversary and Sunday is hubby's birthday!! No idea what we will do to celebrate but definitely no sex lol!

LauraBisoD profile image
LauraBisoD in reply to Dyna321

What do you mean? Congratulations!

But it's inappropriate.

Or you know smtg about surrogacy?

diana0011 profile image
diana0011

Surrogacy is a method or agreement by which a women agrees to carry a baby or pregnancy from another person. There are basically two types of Surrogacy: Traditional surrogate and Gestational surrogates. The traditional surrogate is basically biological mother of the baby. In this process a women is inseminated with the father's sperm. The Gestational surrogate is birth mother. It involves a technique called in vitro fertilization" (IVF) with which eggs are gathered from mother, fertilized with father's sperm, and then replace the embryo into the uterus. In this, process not even egg belongs to mother.

The women who have some medical problem are recommended for surrogacy who have problem with their uterus, hysterectomy, pregnancy risk (heart disease).

Now how to choose surrogate mother: friends or family and surrogacy agencies are also their for surrogate. The mother should be atleast 21, must have gave birth to a child before, should be mentally well, there should be legal contract between surrogate and parents. The parents must have regular interaction with surrogate atleast till delivery.

Hope you find this usable. Good Luck.

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