Hi everyone here!
I am Laura from Italy. Last time reflections about own child are very relevant for me.. All my life I am very carefully with my body and pregnancy frightens me. That`s why in my age I have not had a baby yet. Also I am lawyer and all time a job was more important for me. But nowadays I am in relationships during 4 years and my husband insists he wants child. Definitely I don`t know exactly about myself. Sometime I think that it must be great to have a baby, but I don`t want to become pregnant. I am 36. Perhaps it can be dangerous to become pregnant in my age and I will get difficulties with heаlth?
I have idea to adopt a little girl.It will be perfect for myself. But my husband says that he wants only his own child and I afraid to lose him. He is younger than me by 5 years. I understand his intentions, but in what way I can explain to him my view? I am sure parturition is not for me.
Can you give me some advice how convince him to adopt a child?
I doubt if you can , also it's not that easy to adopt, you are unlikely to be approved if one partner is not enthusiastic. It takes a long time to go through the vetting process. On the other hand pregnancy and childbirth happen to billions of women every day without problems, over 30 it is harder to get pregnant, not sure if the pregnancy itself would be harder too. I think YOU have to decide if you chose him or not being pregnant and let him make his own decision. Even if you did persuade him to try adoption if any thing went wrong, he'd blame you. I understand you not wanting to have one yourself, I've had two and definitely didn't want to have any more but would have liked more kids around the house.
I doubt adore a child at that moment. I really can not understand will my husband will love a child or not. Usually he shies away from talking about adoration.
However, I was planned to be with a man not only for creating a community cell but also for understanding each other's points of view.
How can I become pregnant if I do not want this at all? It's my body. If he had to endure a child, he might have thought otherwise. By the fact you are so right that if any thing went inward, everything will affect the child. So it should not be.
And do you have two children now? Did you give birth by yourself?
In a parallel post I read information about donor eggs. Girls say that you can put your egg to another woman and she can have a baby for you. It sounds wild and I do not know the details. Maybe it could be the solution.
One more thing....childbirth is not all it's cracked up to be either! Hurts like nothing you've ever endured..even with the drugs..then you bring the sweet baby home and they scream all night...and where is hubby...sleeping soundly in bed most likely.