I am physically active and athletic (workout, enjoy outdoor activities). For the most part, I can function daily with good energy, mental focus, and positive outlook. I need this for work since my job is physically demanding.
What I cannot pinpoint, is why I have high energy days and then low energy days. A blood test a couple years ago indicated nothing is wrong, other than low Vitamin D level. I'm a woman in late 50s and I am not ready to be sedentary. However, for some days that I plan to do a workout, or go for a mtn bike ride, a run or something outdoors, my body is like a weighted down door stop. I am so exhausted that I end up talking myself to staying in and relaxing until my energy level rises again. Then I'm like a loco-motive go go go...and the cycle repeats.
I am not sure if it is hormones, post-menopause, depression, or vitamin deficiency. Or, if feeling stressed about money issues, family issues, work issues, to past traumatic life experiences that create my physical mood swings, or if all of this compiled together leads me to feel complacent, not worthy bc nothing is ever going to change and this is as good as it gets for me.
I have had heavy bouts of depression throughout my life, but I could always remedy by working out or going mtn biking, hiking, just getting outdoors. Yes, I do take low dosage AD/AA. I have had insomnia most my life and then discovered the wonderful world of sleeping with sleeping pills. That is now a low dosage too as I became too dependent on higher dosage. Trying to completely quit the sleeping pills, but darn it, I love to sleep when I need to. Then menopause hit and I have slowly declined wanting to do anything. Now in post-menopause, I have also gained 30#s that I can't seem to shred no matter my workout regimen and nutritional intake. It's driving me nutz....
I feel that if I could go to a detox camp for a month, to eliminate all medicines and toxic environmental surroundings, I could detox my body, mind and spirit from all the crap I hold onto in my head; which I feel causes me all of my sickness and symptoms.
It would be such a blessing to feel completely wholesome, positive, healthy, energetic and happy; and, of course 30# lighter.