I grew up on a small subsistence farm. Parents required me to be a part of the Clean Plate Club. I had to finish my plate of food before I could leave the table. It never mattered whether I liked it or not. We must not waste food! At least that’s what they said. My mother loved cooking but most meals were pretty simple; a meat, a veggie and sometimes a grain. Veggies were usually on the side, way over cooked to mush and barely seasoned.
This approach to food has molded me fundamentally. I feel like I always need to finish my plate rather mindlessly. Even if I don’t like something much if it’s in front of me I will continue to chip away at it.
I prefer veggies raw, very soft or mixed in with meats and grains. I have trouble making or inventing veggie dishes. The thing is I love vegetables but when they’re a side dish I just don’t really get excited about them.
My parents didn’t and still don’t think it matters if you like something, just finish it. This has made it so I don’t know what feeling like I’ve had enough feels like. A too full feeling is obvious but enough just doesn’t register with me.
I got a trainer last year and she has me logging my food which has really helped me. I just still struggle with food daily and wish I had people to commiserate with and offer advice.
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WildRedHair
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Hi, I don't know if you lost the link to all our activities that I gave you when you joined. If you head to the daily diary, you'll see what members are planning and you might find some inspiration
oh I understand that, very much.😞 It’s taken years to have less on my plate and leave some. 😳 One of my posts I wrote eat like a skinny person,😊 which some joker suggested I meant eat a skinny person 😂
I appreciate that. Yeah there’s many different mindsets that work for people. I think if a person can be healthy and happy then go with what works. I’m just so new at it and don’t know anyone else on a healthy weight loss journey.
I too came from clean plate brigade but my mum was a good cook all be it her veg was boiled to death🤣
We were not allowed pudding or to leave the table until it was all gone.
I still have that mentality but now I dish up much smaller portions and try to eat mindfully. It took me a very long time to get to this point. I find using a smaller plate helps, sometimes a side plate.
Take smaller portions eat slowly go back for more if I need it. That has become my way of eating now.
If I eat out and portions are large I mentally divide my food and tell myself I will only eat this much. Unless I am still hungry. I must say that theses days large plates of food often make me go off my food.
Good luck with your journey. Hope to see you on Daily Diary
Yes I grew up in the 50s and some things were still rationed from the war so every morsel of food had to be eaten whether you liked it or not. If it wasn't it was served up again for the next meal until it was eaten. My father was from an Italian background so we were eating pasta when nobody else I knew did. Plates full of cold worms it seemed to me.
There are plusses and minuses to this I find. What I'm really grateful for is that I 'm not a picky eater, which is good when friends cook for me because I will eat it. I can say it was lovely even if I don't particularly like it and not appear rude. The minus is that I do eat everything which is no good for weight loss.
I have trained myself to always leave a little on my plate when eating at home. It was hard at first but now I do it automatically. I believe it sends a message to the brain that I've had more than enough. That's my theory anyway.
Also I have a list of disappointing foods. These are food that are just ok not special. For example some biscuits, mass produced gateau, some sausage rolls, some ice cream, some burgers etc etc. Everyone will have their own list. Buffet food is often bad for disappointing food, so when I'm faced with it I ask myself if I'll actually enjoy it. If not I don't eat it. Most of the time anyway. 😆 Hope you find your answers.
We were also part of the clean plate club and would roll around in agony on a Sunday afternoon of being overfed. My mum seemed to think children should eat the same amount as adults and eat everything was the moto. You would "sit there till you eat it" too. Gives you a very ugly attitude towards food if you ask me. I love to cook and eat healthy foods but, I cannot deny that I have been affected by this too. I try to make sure more than half my plate is vegetables but, I am vegetarian too. Accept of course meals like pasta bolognese. Chewing foods helps to tell the body it is full and , like you, vegetables were liquefied with the help of a pressure cooker! So, raw, better cooking veg helps create less chance of this mindless eating. We were also made to eat things we didn't like and I ended up doing a lot of the cooking stuff I got older-hey presto, less rubbish food.
Think of the foods you enjoy and look at online recipes that include them. I make soups and stews which use loads of vegetables which makes them the main ingredients. I also make many dishes when making curry rather than just one. Roast veg is another favourite and herbs and spices really pep them up.
Hi . I feel most of us did this as I was growing up . Lunch was served everyday at school . It was rare you brought your own and plates had to be empty before collection . I sat alone with a bowl of sultanas and custard at school . I was told eat and you can go . I was quite a stubborn child too and I refused . I seem to have been watched afterwards for a while , It seemed the done thing in the 60's .
I really appreciate your response. I was born in 76 and know that other people experience the obsession with cleaning their plates. I just wish it didn’t make food such an obsessive thought for me. However I’m working on it.
Only idea is eat your food in a smaller bowl or plate then if you clear it then you have only eaten the portion you have made knowing it wasn’t enormous. My father was over 6 years in the infantry WW2 . I suppose food was appreciated and taken as almost a reward or a privilege. I have those feelings sometimes as I take for granted my 3 decent meals in a comfortable home with people I love . This doesn’t completely change anything but it puts things into perspective. Although I have lost weight after each meal I am always planning the next . The UK climate draws us towards food and drink . The offers , apps , adverts and when I see trolleys full everywhere and every time I shop it makes me question the cost of living crisis as so many have vast quantities of processed rubbish and things I try not to buy that make my bills rocket . I don’t think it’s wrong to be obsessed with food . Turn it into a positive by making good choices, visually appealing food. Enjoy it !!
I don’t think it is for anyone inc me to advise you on therapy. I would read people’s comments on this site first . Shredding weight for a lot of people is difficult and very individualistic. I love Zumba and the casual but motivating friends I have found there. Not always bothered about weight but fun exercise . I am 63 - not a youngster but I have found intense thoughts got me nowhere. The pro activity of exercising and just getting on with a life I could enjoy but control has helped me get to a better place.
Hello WildRedHair, I do hope you find your way to enjoying food in portions that make you content. I love the replies that you have received, and I am sure you find inspiration on the forum. Take care xxx
Hey, so I’ve already lost 54lbs or about 25kg. I may want to lose at least 12kg more. It’s taken me a year to get this far. I believe that you can reach your goal too.
I've never heard that one before but would have to say that your mother was a very wise woman. If only all mothers thought that way we would enjoy our food without overeating and gaining weight.
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