Day 3 of NHS 12 week plan.
Set myself a limit of 1490 calories a day and a rough 80/20 (healthy/less healthy) - no "BAD" food here.
Had my breakfast, entered in my lunch & dinner food (except for cheese for dinner to be measured later). Everything was planned!
But then it was someones birthday at work and the cake came out in force.... giant american style muffins, Mr Kipling everywhere, tubs of "mini" teacakes, tiffin & chocolate shortbread...
I choose a chocolate chip giant muffin. Still had 249 cals left for my evening cheese (I'm making quesadillas)
But then I went to the vending machine with my change and bought a packet of McCoys Salt & Vinegar - now these are not the normal sized packs - these are the massive 47.5gram packs - even as they fell down from the vending machine and I reached my hand in & removed them, a part of my brain went you don't even want to eat them that much...
I ate them - afterwards I just thought why did I do that ... now no cals spare for cheese if I eat the choc muffin.
Sitting here now writing this - i know why I ate them - Self Sabotage...
I had done 2 days where I stuck under my calorie count and was feeling pleased with myself - almost smug - haven't managed 2 days of sticking to the SW plan since 2015. So in my head - I obviously deserved a reward for doing so well... clearly my brain views food as a reward.
Now if I could I would take the McCoys back as I can still taste them in mouth & eating them as made me sad. But I cant & thats the way life works. All I can do now is not punish myself or guilt eat even more.
So I am keeping the muffin & taking it home for my hubbie. I have removed the record of it from my calorie tracking app. I will go home & eat my planned dinner, measure a proportion of cheese out for my Quesadilla & then if I have the left over unused calories I will spilt my muffin with the hubbie & just have half.
Overall I'm hoping I can finish the day with no guilt & within count.
In this case its all about mind over matter - what do I want out of this day... do I want a guilty feeling no - I want to finish the day HAPPY!