I am blessed to have you all....

[american_army_guy]

So it's been 5 weeks since I met you all and boy have I been a really really bad quit ( alot due to anxiety on top of quitting smoking cold turkey and quitting surgar and caffeine at the same time)  

Been a up and down roller coaster for sure, I don't think and I truly mean this, I don't think I would have made it this far without you all.....  You all may be screen names or funny pictures but when I see them names or pictures I am relieved because i am usually a wreck needing help.......

I love you all and I mean that....  i annoy you all and I know it but I have been so afraid at times....  Especially early on in treatment when I didn't know what anything was.....

I hope I can look back doing better and laugh about this in hind sight.....  Got me tearing up over here like a big ole soft beat lol but I hope I can look back and smile about this.....  

My dad in 09 laying there in bed held my hand and asked me to quit, plead with me to quit and I said i would.....  He passed 2 days later from Lung Cancer and I miss him so so much, he was my best friend.....  I am honestly lost without him around, there are times I just want to see him come home from the Rail Road.....  Like he's not gone.....  I know this will sound wild but when I had that attack that made me quit, i laid here crying one night and I swear I felt his hand grab my hand and made me sit up to look that's how real it felt.  I want to believe he's here but I want him to be happy.....  I don't want him to be here just waiting.....  I don't want him to be alone......   Anyways I been a wreck This last month but I want to thank you all.  I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart........  

[Andrew-S]

Hi AAG, a really nice post. I can tell from your posts that you are going through it, with the quit, the anxiety and the loses you have suffered. Please don't think that you annoy anyone on here because I don't feel that way and I know the others will feel the same. I'm sure everyone genuinely feels bad for what you are going through and we just want to help you. We don't always have all the answers and don't always know what to advise but we do our best and muddle through together. 

This is a wonderful forum and you're part of it now. You're doing so well with your quit you should feel proud of yourself. Your dad would be proud of you, you are doing what he asked you to and he will know. Take care. 😀

[madametobacco49 in reply to Andrew-S]

Beautiful post Andrew--Much love,MmeT

[Carissa28 10 MONTH WINNER]

you don't annoy anyone, i'm pretty sure i speak for all when i say that.

i'm so sorry you've lost your father, God's grace may have allowed him to reach out to you for comfort to you.

you are doing so great in your quit especially with all the challenges that have been thrown at you.

we are all a family here and supporting eachother is what we do

hang in there, be strong you're going to get through all of this, look how far you've already come!!

[madametobacco49 in reply to Carissa28]

Spoken like a true champion sweet Carissa--Love,MmeT

[kimberly434 5 MONTH WINNER]

I completely understand what you are going through...especially with quitting the sugar, caffeine, and smoking. I quit all three at the same time too and my anxiety is driving me nuts! This site has surely helped me. The support that we receive is great! I have a hard time expressing my feelings with my family, and they simply do not understand what I am going through, but everyone on this site understands! I hate the shortness of breath (makes my anxiety worse)...but hang in there together we can do this!!! Take care!

[madametobacco49 in reply to kimberly434]

Lovely Kim--you are wonderful--MmeT

[kimberly434 5 MONTH WINNER in reply to madametobacco49]

Thank you so much! Your just so sweet! I am so proud of your 6 months. You show me that there is hope...I just have to be strong! One baby step at a time.

[madametobacco49 in reply to kimberly434]

Don't worry Kim--Just hang on--we are all in this together--remarkable but true--Love-MmeT

[madametobacco49]

We get it AAG believe me--It is a lovefest here--I am so so glad im  here-- --NEVER feel bad about how you feel--because you are never alone here--There is always someone who gets it--sometimes-more often than not--many do.....It can be quite overwhelming to realize this can happen on the internet--Im a lifer now,never leavin--I don't know what Id do without these lovely people -5 months and they carried me thru a lot of it ( angels wings)--so smile thru your tears--We aren't going anywhere--and you probably wont either--We are happy to have you--Believe it--Love,MmeT

[dontdothisagain 6 MONTH WINNER in reply to madametobacco49]

Lovely response madame just love all folks on QS.

[madametobacco49 in reply to dontdothisagain]

The feeling is mutual--xxx MmeT

[dontdothisagain 6 MONTH WINNER]

Hi AAG, You have clearly been going through the grinder on your quit and going cold turkey I think is so difficult. Also you have had the anxiety and panic attacks as well as the normal problems associated with finding the path to being free of the nicotine addiction and smoke menace.  A 5-6 week quit with all that c**p going on is phenomenal and despite all this you have won through. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and memories of your dad with us - my dad died of cancer too (not lung) - he been gone nearly 40 years and I still miss him. Now I know that you can make good on your promise to your dad - he would be so proud. You are right about quit family like having a warm blanket wrapped around you on a really cold night, feeling you are not alone is priceless and all are understanding and giving.  The qualities you have, your determination, guts and willpower are the things that are going to see you through all this and you are blessed as you can't borrow, buy or be given any of them. This and support of quit family. Now 2.45 a m and must sleep now. Take care of yourself and good luck with everything. God Bless JC.

P. S. I also hope you look back in time on all this with hindsight, wonder how you survived it all and laugh your bloody head off!!!.

[Hidden in reply to dontdothisagain]

Love your reply ❤️

[madametobacco49]

Lovely lovely post DDTA

[american_army_guy 6 Weeks Winner]

Thanks you all I mean that.....  I really do......   I am thankful for you all

[madametobacco49 in reply to american_army_guy]

AAG--I believe you--and Im sure the others do too because we all feel the same--Ty for the love --We need more of it in this world--Stay with us,wont you? MmeT

[Hidden in reply to american_army_guy]

👍🏻❤️

[Hidden]

Sooo beautiful❤️  Thankyou for sharing your true self with us xxx

[Maddyg]

Hi AAG , I truely believe our loved ones are by our side guiding us, and that your dad was there comforting you. He will be very Proud of you . You have done Fantastic, and it sounds like you are starting to feel a bit better. We are always here to listen in good times and bad, special lot here.

Take Care 

Maddy xx

[droopyJ]

Hi AAG..... Your not annoying honest 😊

There may be others on here who are going through something similar and your posts help them 👍👍😊

We're all in it together and the more of us there are, the stronger we are 😊

You keep doing what your doing and I'm sure your dad and the rest of your family are real proud of ya, like we are 😊😊

[Sandie51]

Hi AAG, 

What a lovely post you put up, tinged with sadness , I too lost my dad to lung/bone cancer in 2005 and I miss him every day , but the replies to your post are just heart warming and positive, xx Sandie 

[Briarwood Administrator Ducky]

A beautiful post AAG, this quit family is simply the best and I'm delighted you're part of it👫👬👭🚭😊

[Coco797 17 Month Winner]

You are doing amazing, keep up the good work. The struggle is worth it! 

[jljl16 27 Months Winner]

Lovely post AAG, sorry for your loss and think how proud your dad is watching over you and knowing the strength you've had to quit, well done