feeling cheated.: im sorry that i have come on... - Quit Support

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feeling cheated.

J160 profile image
J1608 MONTH WINNER
16 Replies

im sorry that i have come on to rant but i'm really annoyed today. why should i stop smoking no one cares none of my friends or family have even said well done. Maybe its because i have failed before and they expect it to happen again . do you know my OH was supposed to stop with me oh no he is still happily puffing away day and night . Is it a 3 week thing or is it because i did it cold turkey this time but i could easily smoke right now. Was that a urge or craving i just had because i have calmed down now and don't want to smoke now. when does it get better?

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J160 profile image
J160
8 MONTH WINNER
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16 Replies
Maddyg profile image
Maddyg

Hi j160, I know how you feel , my family were the same with me, guess because like you I have said it many times. Even now , although have gone nearly 3 months, still feel they doubt me in the back of their mind. You come on here and shout all you like, we know how you feel. You have done amazing and think of the benefits to your health. Your main reason is you are doing it for you first and foremost for a healthier life. You ask if that was an urge or craving, I would say anger, as I have been there. It's a tough road we are on . Deep breaths, count to ten :) hugs x

Briarwood profile image
BriarwoodAdministratorLONG TERM WINNER

Hi J, yep I know how ya feel coz my hubby was meant to quit with me in January and I waited a couple of months for him😩 then decided to do it myself. I hated the fact he was still smoking, anger and resentment made me not a very nice person for a while but the smell was enough to put me off, coz I hated it. You will turn the corner and it's just natural to feel this way at the moment. 

3 weeks is terrific👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 and most people don't understand how hard this is☹️ But we do and I can honestly say it will get easier. Hang in there coz you're doing a great job so go and treat yourself to something nice, you deserve it👍🏼💐😊

madametobacco49 profile image
madametobacco49

rant all you want--they don't get how hard it is--that's why we have eachother :)

bigron2238 profile image
bigron2238

Don't worry about who pays you on the back and says well done don't stop for the cheers stop for you.I personally don't care who notice or who doesn't it for me,I'm selfish all for me.

Bevie1968 profile image
Bevie19688 MONTH WINNER

My husband stills smokes but outside as soon as I come to bed he smokes at the window and I no cause the smell yuk it so puts me off you rant away we all have done it and will again the good thing is everyone understands how hard this journey is  well done on 3 weeks xx

kimberly434 profile image
kimberly4345 MONTH WINNER

I caved in on three weeks and smoked one, but please don't do that...you will regret it badly. I also went cold turkey but I decided the batch was the best way for me. Don't worry if your friends or family don't care....this is for you! You are worth it. 

droopyJ profile image
droopyJ

Hiya j, firstly your doing really well 😊

Secondly you give up smoking for yourself.....its your body and your life, no one else can do it for you. Unless your family or friends have been through this then they wouldn't understand. As to your OH.... He'll give up when he's ready but don't you give in just because no one has said well done.... You will kick yourself!

Prove to yourself you can do this, you are doing this so you might as well carry on 😊

So start saving your cig money and make everyone jealous when you treat yourself to something nice 😊

Keep us nice and close coz your doing a great job 😊👍👍🚭🚭🚭🚭🚭🚭

Andrew-S profile image
Andrew-S

I think this a common feeling and well documented that this is a journey you travel alone and especially non smokers have no idea what ur going through when u think they should be putting on a fanfare in your honour we all feel the same this is why this forum is so good. Don't worry we understand and feel the same 😀

Hey J,

You're independent ... I can tell you're a fighter ... Let other people think what they want .... You're trying to save your life by quitting cigarettes!   Remember , you're in the hardest month ... The first ....... I craved for 5 months and then all of a sudden , I had no desire no matter what mood I was in..

Best wishes from 🇨🇦👍🏻☀️xx

jpuffdrake profile image
jpuffdrake

I understand.  I'm at 3 weeks too - some people are super supportive and some people are like "eh" - especially people who have never really dealt with addiction - if they have never been a smoker, they don't get it.  They don't understand how hard it is to get to where you are now.  I hope it gets better. I'm at week 3 too! :) I've noticed that any negative emotion starts me off on a craving (sometimes even good emotions too). But I hope it gets better. :) 

glolin profile image
glolinLONG TERM WINNER

Support is awesome to have -often support doesnt not last long from friends. Remember, you are quitting for you...so dont go worrying what other dod or dont do..this is your journey..its is only you that can make this happen...Ole Mr nic will play tricks on you - make you consider should I or shouldnt I - or maybe just one..that will be OK..This is all part od the process...You have to be strong and hold your head up high.....You want to take control......as nike say  JUST DO IT xx

Normally I am a fairly calm nice individual  (I like to think) but other people's attitudes to my quit has baffled me. I have faced the oh you've quit AGAIN? response and also the it's about time response. One particularly sanctimonious cardiac nurse practitioner nearly had a punch on the nose from me when they dismissed my 3 week quit as nothing. Basically I have come to realise it is a lonely personal journey. Coming on this site is giving me the courage and determination to carry on. All the naysayers can do one!!!

in reply to

Misery loves company 4cats.  Those people you work with don't want you to succeed in quitting cigarettes... That's called 'levelling' when a person tries to take your power away.... WE WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY AND STAY OFF the CIGARETTES🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

You know what - no one has said "Well done" because they simply have NFI what it's like to quit one of the most addictive substances known.  They have NFI how hard it is. To a non-smoker, it is perceived as something you either "choose" or "choose not" to do.  How far from the truth that is.  Being in the vice-like grip of addiction to nicotine is not about 'choice'......it's about addiction.  However, unless someone has been there, done it and got the bloody T shirt, they honestly have no concept of what it really means to free yourself from that addiction.  They have no idea how proud you feel, how much more you like yourself, how very, very much it means to your self-confidence and self-esteem.  So, because they can't possibly know what a massive achievement it is, just pat yourself on the back instead; tell yourself how bloody wonderful you are to beat an addiction that has held so many in its grip, and you've escaped it - by yourself, without others, because you were strong enough.  That's how good it is.  A non-smoker doesn't 'get it' and a smoker who hasn't quit doesn't want to 'get it' yet.  Congratulations - you've done an amazing job and joining this community is also brilliant, because we all know exactly what it's like and how far you've come!! Go, go, go!!! I reckon we're all strong people on here - that's why we get along!!! <3 xxx

in reply to

Love your post Moonweaver!  Well said👍🏻

in reply to

yes...very well put!

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