Feeling Guilty for not missing my daughter

[Irishisme]

My daughter tried to commit suicide a few months ago. Since then my ptsd has been so bad going from jolting away at night thinking I heard my phone to crying while driving to work in the morning. I had a trip planned for a family wedding and almost cancelled but my husband convinced me it would be good to get away. The week away was amazing. There were outdoor activities. Waterfalls and a trip down the coast along with a beautiful wedding. After arriving home I got a call from my daughter asking to come by. When she did I asked what was wrong and she said nothing I just missed you. I felt nauseous saying “I missed you too” because it wasn’t true. She proceeded to vent to me about feeling neglected by a friend and not being sure if she was going to be fired. It all made me so anxious and stressed. Yet I feel guilty because if I could I would go back to the coast and just drop off the face of the earth and never let anyone know where I am. Anyway that’s it. Thanks for reading