To all the folks here in the US, I hope your holiday is happy and meaningful and free of stress. And delicious. We are going to be on our own at his beautiful place in the mountains, all family being far away. I will make a turkey feast and bake bread and chop wood, and drink wine! We will sit by the fire and watch some movies and, I hope, some sunsets. No sunrises!!! I plan on sleeping in. I am thankful for four days off of work. And I am thankful for my dear man, despite everything. He is a keeper.
So I wish peace and love to everyone here, and comfort to those who need comforting. Hugs. Lots of hugs. Easterncedar
p.s. I am also thankful for all of you!!
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easterncedar
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Easterncedar wish we could all join you sounds wonderful, I hope you have a lovely time, enjoy your turkey dinner, and desserts, and of course your wine, we raise our glass to you both, and wish you happy thanksgiving, I can also smell that lovely bread. Sending you a big hug. Yvonne xxxxxxxx
We will be spending the holiday at home with one son and a daughter. I will be stressing out; and regardless of the thermometer reading, I will know full well the bird is not cooked after four hours, with the grand climax of the night, "This tastes like cardboard, doesn't it?"
And we will all laugh, and eat more while my poor kids convince me it was a wonderful dinner. But the best part of the night will be when my "home town" plays Detroit ...
Go Bears!!!!
Better yet, can we come to your house EC? I can stack the wood....my son can chop it and you can drink the vino!!!hahahah (Have a great and LOOOONNNNNGGG wkd)
Have a wonderfulThanksgiving. We are slowly preparing for Christmas when we'll be ten in the house (two young couples, friends of daughter, coming out from UK with three kids under four). It will not be restful but it will be fun.
To all in US and Canada, Have a great Thanksgiving.
Easterncedar enjoy the mountains but chopping wood sounds a bit active. Freshly baked bread sounds better. Turkey is a bird I always over cook always dry and tasteless so avoided except for Christmas but as over last 3 Christmas it was only 2 of us I tried turkey crown great easy to cook less waste and tasty great discovery. This year going to my son and daughter in law so no cooking for once.
Tim, hope you had a great day and came home with leftovers. I did the crown thing before and it was perfect. Got overly ambitious this year and made a 22 pound bird-HA! Lots of turkey sandwiches in our near future
Best JGC
Hi all.
Happy Turkey Day from the Big Apple!
Joe is in the early stages of CBGD.
Hands starting to curl and pain, walk is slower, words harder to find, and he only knows me as his wife now and then.
But, I am ready to start making my lasagna and stuffed artichokes. I am sad at times but grateful for the great life this wonderful guy gave us all
Happy Thanksgiving to all! We'll try not to set off the fire alarm at my parents' condo this year. Last year the fire trucks came and we interrupted everyone's turkey dinner
when my sister in law's dessert bubbled over in the oven. Trying for stress free this year :). Missing my daughter away in college in California until Christmas. Wishing everyone all the best!
Where does she go to college in California? Oh, and I too have set off fire alarms with my cooking. Have learned to turn on the exhaust fan as soon as I begin cooking. A wt washcloth over alarm works wonders as well!
I am thankful for no alarms this year! My brother and his wife and 2 young daughters came. My mom, with Alzheimer's, forgets he has a family so it's always great when they show up. My daughter goes to Cal Poly in San Luis Obispo. She'll be home soon for Christmas. My son goes to Plymouth State in NH. He is heading back to school today and back again for the holidays soon. Are you from California?
I am from the east coast originally. Have been in California for about 25 yrs. so it sure feels like it. My son is at UCLA. Those are wonderful schools your children attend. They must be very bright and good students. That's funny about your mom forgetting he has a family. Doesn't it feel like sometimes that our lives feel like somebody made them up? Like you could not write stuff this surreal. Talk about a reality show. Seriously I have put considerable thought into trying to get a documentary produced to bring awareness to neurological degenerative diseases (i.e. PSP MSA CBD ...). To follow families through different stages of the disorder. Problem being hard to find the time when I am trying to cope with a loved one with the disease. But best to you and I am glad you will have your family all together for the holidays
Today was my parents 61st wedding anniversary. They still love each other, mom with Alzheimer's and dad with
Parkinsonism/PSP/dementia who knows? It is surely surreal. She forgets he can't walk and will ask him to get up to come to dinner. Worse, she'll try to help him up. He also thinks he can walk. We have to hide the remote for his lift chair. She gets very mad at him for not responding when we speak to him, for spilling food and using his fingers when he eats. Tonight he wouldn't take more than
a few bites of his anniversary dinner (glad I didn't get the lobster), but very carefully ate the hot cherry pie for dessert with a knife and fork.
At 2AM my mom has screamed at the caregiver to get my dad up and make the coffee because they were "going home". Another night she locked the caregiver out of the bedroom while my dad was having an asthma attack and needed help. Early one morning mom called 911 when my dad fell after she "helped him" out of bed, while the caregiver slept in the next room utterly exhausted after a long night taking care of dad. (Mom doesn't remember the caregiver is there!) Deep down my mom is a racist and is frequently horrible to our helper who is from Ghana--but not in my presence of course. On the other hand, sometimes mom helps out when my dad is refusing to go to bed or is acting overly crazy. Apparently she has a very stern voice she uses on him that actually gets him to behave. Mom used to ask me all the time how to get rid of a "freeloader". She can't figure out why the caregiver is there.
We never thought in a million years that anything like this existed, let alone would happen to our family!
My kids are terrific with their grandparents when they are home from school. (Your son must also be brilliant going to UCLA!) My husband is a saint. I am very lucky for my support team.
Oh Easterncedar, what an absolutely beautiful post. We too spent the holidays with just us but my you are ambitious to make bread! I used to but already overwhelmed with preparing the feast all by myself. But when I saw the look on his face when I took the turkey out of the oven and put it in front of him made all my efforts and preperations worthwhile. Happy belated Thanksgiving!
Bread is easy, especially when I use the New York Times no-knead recipe. With time and a cast iron dutch oven, it couldn't be simpler. I made biscuits last night to put under turkey and gravy and he asked me to do that more often. I do love biscuits, so the only problem with that is my with my weight.
Moving IS hard! Less than two years ago, I bought a house utterly inconvenient for his condition. I can't believe how stupid I was. All very well to imagine, as I did, that we could convert the downstairs alcove to a bedroom and put in a bath, but it turns out finding a contractor is now about impossible, and the rooms are too narrow for the wheelchair AND we have stairs! It's close to my job and the neighbors are wonderful, but I am contemplating looking for another place. But moving again? I shrivel at the thought. I have the idea that you moved a major distance, is that right?
EC, not a major geographical distance, just a major downsize. I say just but it was no easy feat. Giving up our home was not the difficult part. The actual work of deciding what to keep or discard when losing a few thousand square footage in living space was. We did exactly what you were intending to do with putting a master downstairs and making the bathroom accessible. But in the end it did not matter. The rural area with his frequent falls made trips to the ER challenging. I like being closer to his doctors and hospitals and having people close by in case of an emergency. It was sad discarding unnecessary but sentimental possessions we acquired over the years individually and together as a couple. Though I must admit, it does feel good to live more simply. That's a hard decision you have to make. Don't beat yourself up so much. In the initial stages of PSP where we are now felt like so far down the road didn't it?
Someone gave me this advice when I was trying to figure out what to do about our living situation. They said that I needed to think about further down the road. Where I would be happy living alone. I know it is difficult to think like that. At least for me it was. But it did change where we ultimately ended up moving. If you absolutely love your house maybe you could lease it and find a more functionable place to call home for now. A guest house all on one level would be idea. Living in a smaller space makes it more efficient to take care of them which reduces the stress in your own life.
Maybe you could rent a furnished space and would not have to move all the furniture from your present home. We lived in a extended stay corporate suite for several months before we found something, and honestly it was a relief not to have to worry about decorating and fixing it up. We even had an accessible bathroom and other amenities. Just something to think about. Out here contractors are a dime a dozen. Now good ones-that's a different story
Please take care and don't be so hard on yourself-you are doing a good job.
WE ARE GOING TO MY DAUGHTERS FOR XMAS DAY BUT THEN THEY ARE COMING TO IS OON THE SUNDAY BUT ON BOXING DAY WE ARE ALONE AND HAVE GOT A FEAST FO JUST THE TWO OF US... 2 LOBSTERS AND SMOKED SALMON TO START WITH !!
MY DArling HUSBAND IS JUST SO ADVENTURIOUS AS JE ALWAYS MAKES SUCH AN EFFORT TO MAKE DELICIOUS FOOD - I LOVE HIM SO MUCH
Sounds lovely all round, Shasha. So glad you have such nice times in store. One of my sisters decided to cheer me up with a quick visit, and drove 9 hours, with her husband, for what will be just a 2-night stay. We will have lobsters tonight!
Yes, I am lucky with my dear sisters. I have 5! But we are all scattered. This one lives the closest to me, and it's not as close as I would like. Still I love Maine, and can offer lobster bribes for visitors! Merry Christmas!
Thank you so much, Jill! Your hugs mean a lot! Wish you could be here to have a lobster with us. I hope your Christmas is lovely and full of treats, anyway. Love and hugs back to you, Ec
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