Dad's operation

Hi. I don't know if you remember me but mum has PSP and dad was waiting for heart valve replacement surgery. We just heard yesterday that dad's operation s to be next Thursday, so are now desperately trying to find mum some respite care whilst dad is in hospital and for a couple of weeks afterwards. I'm feeling pretty stressed and guilty as I know she doesn't want to go, but I have to prioritise my dad's health at the moment


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10 Replies

  • Hil Lindsey

    You r right to,prioritise one parents help,wh

    En required -i think your mum will have to go into respite care accept thats for her safety as well

    lol jill

  • I recommend Charing. They have a lot of branches and do residential as well as nursing. If your dad needs respite too they would arrange the rooms for them. Best wishes and I am glad your dads health needs are being addressed. X

  • Hi I don't no where you live but try your local hospice they are suppose to take people in for respite up to 2 weeks if they have a bed do you have continual health care at home if you do they should sort this out for you good luck

  • Yes I k agree with what the other s have said

    You need to,get,some respite care sorted for,your mum and dad


  • Hi Lindsy, Without knowing your local circumstances It's difficult to offer positive help but my experience was that Social Services and the local Hospice were far more help than the GP/NHS. In fact my daughter found an excellent local Hospice via the internet of which the GP was totally unaware. I know others have completely the opposite experience, it seems a bit of post code lottery, it is after all run by human beings and the help available constrained by budgets. I found Hospice staff were very well informed and knew the best local individuals to contact within the social services system and also had many links with other helpful services. I do hope you manage to get the help you need and begin to feel less stressed, also that your Dad's operation goes well, you need to keep fit to be a carer!!!

    Kind regards., Jerry.

  • Dear Lindsey,

    Things are moving thick and fast for you & family. Sometimes here, when the hospital social workers speak on behalf of family there is a greater change of nursing care/respite accommodation - possible in UK as well ???


    Alana - Western Australia

  • hi my

  • sorry meant to say hi my name is Rachel. my mum has cbd we're in ire. mum's had respite in local hospice and also attends their wonderful day care on a Thursday . hospice nurse has justgot us increase in help hrs too. mum's ok but recently had big decline in cognitive function and mobility. i believe the earlier the hospice is involved the better.x good luck to ur dad mine had cardiac surgery 5 yrs ago

  • Thanks. We looked at a nursing home today. It looks lovely. The hospice has a really long waiting list x

  • Just want to wish you the best in all you and your family are going through. I hope your father's surgery is successful and his recovery is quick, and that you find the respite care for your mother. I wish you strength!

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