Most dads and grandads have done thi... - Positive Wellbein...

Positive Wellbeing During Self-Isolation

9,738 posts

Most dads and grandads have done this, much to the annoyance of mums and grandmothers !!😊

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits
53 Replies

Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night.

The waiter comes and takes their drink order.

“I would like a Sprite,” said the first little piggy.

“I would like a Coke,” said the second little piggy.

“I want water, lots and lots of water,” said the third little piggy.

The drinks are brought out and the waiter takes their orders for dinner.

“I want a nice big steak,” said the first piggy.

“I would like the salad plate,” said the second piggy.

“I want water, lots and lots of water,” said the third little piggy.

The meals were brought out and a while later the waiter approached the table and asked if the piggies would like any dessert.

“I want a banana split,” said the first piggy.

“I want a root beer float,” said the second piggy.

“I want water, lots and lots of water,” exclaimed the third little piggy.

“Pardon me for asking,” said the waiter, “but why have you only ordered water?”

You’re gonna hate me for this 😊…

The third piggy says—

“Well, somebody has to go ‘Wee, wee, wee, all the way home.’”😀.

.

.

U2 alert: I played Bonopoly last night....!

It's like Monopoly... but the Streets have no Name.

.

Lance is pretty uncommon name these days, but in medieval times, people were named Lance a lot.

.

At the Hospital today, I asked the nurse if I could do my own stitches

She said suture yourself

Written by
Bazzak profile image
Bazzak
Reading Rabbits
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .

The ability to reply to this post has been turned off.

53 Replies
Activity2004 profile image
Activity2004

These were really funny! My favorites were the U2 and the Three Little Pigs! :-)

Narwhal10 profile image
Narwhal10 in reply toActivity2004

Mine too 😄

Activity2004 profile image
Activity2004 in reply toNarwhal10

The U2 is one band that I like listening to and the Three Pigs are interesting to read (depending on the version).😀👍🌈

Narwhal10 profile image
Narwhal10 in reply toActivity2004

I was totally into U2 twenty years ago, Who’s going to run your wild horses. And always had great fun doing this little piggy went to market with family (when they were children). 😊

Jennymary profile image
Jennymary

Can't stop laughing over the 3 Little Pigs, even laughing while I write this 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny

Love the 🐷🐷🐷 one.

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

Hope you are well Maria 😘xx

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toBazzak

Yes I'm very well thanks, especially after all the laughs I've had on here tonight. Hope you are too xx

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

Yep I'm ok, seeing the doctor tomorrow, but sure I'm fine 🙂xx

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toBazzak

Hope all goes well xx

springcross profile image
springcross

😀😀 x

🤣😂🤣😂 3 little pigs and the stitches are my favourites, had me in stitches 🤣😂 but they all made me laugh 😂

Hope you go on ok at the drs. I will report back after I've had telephone consultation with urologist and gastro pain consultant!! Take care and stay safe Lynne

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply to

And you darling, replied below xx

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply to

🤣x hope you as comfortable as can be Lynne, thinking of you and sending my good vibes to you and your family xxx

in reply toBazzak

Thank you. And to you and yours too.👍🌈

Adlon57 profile image
Adlon57

Ever thought of writing jokes for Christmas crackers? As a former Irish comedian would have said "That's a cracker!"

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toAdlon57

Isn't that where he gets them from lol🤣

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

You are going over my knee Maria !!!!

😊😊

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toBazzak

Ooh......

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

I will be gentle 😊

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toBazzak

Wel that' s no fun then😊

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

🤣🤣xx

in reply toAdlon57

Yes!! I can't remember his name but he was brilliant!! Xxxx

in reply toAdlon57

Frank Carson?!?

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply to

You just googled that, come on be honest !!😁😁

in reply toBazzak

No, it just came to me!! I remember watching him on The Comedians with my Mum, Dad and brother !! Great!!

Narwhal10 profile image
Narwhal10

Awesome 😂🤣😂🤣

Do your talents have no end ? Guided tours, comedy ledgend, sock model and now a reinvention with Barrington Safe Man . It’s your own aftershave next isn’t it ?

Marnie22 profile image
Marnie22 in reply toNarwhal10

I wonder what it will smell of?! 🤭🌸

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toMarnie22

Don't ask......😵

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

It has a rather sophisticated ring to it, Barrington Ashley's aromatic aftershave !!😚😚

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toBazzak

I can just imagine the advert.......like those old 70s aftershave ads.

Why not call it Safe Man?

Narwhal10 profile image
Narwhal10 in reply toMadBunny

I heard on the grapevine, that the catch line is going to be

‘Be More Than A Man, Be A Barrington Safe Man’ and Tyson Fury is going to endorse it. How did you know that inspiration from this

youtube.com/watch?v=6rbZr7Y...

was being used ? 🤣😂🤣😂

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toNarwhal10

Hahahaha. Just read your post. What a great start to the day. Cheers 👍😄🐰

Narwhal10 profile image
Narwhal10 in reply toMadBunny

The way you, Barry and Marnie (Sorry if I’ve excluded anyone) bounce off each other really is hilarious and keeps me going. So big TA x

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toNarwhal10

Thanks. That's hopefully one of the things this forum aims to do:cheer us all up. Your contributions have been great,too.I must say I really enjoyed all the banter last night. I was in tears I was laughing so much at some of the comments Marnie was making. And your comment about Barry's talents- my sides were aching as I was trying not to disturb hubby by laughing out loud. ( I broke the golden rule of not being on my phone in bed).Poor Barry- he does come in for some stick. But he takes it( and gives it out) in good spirit😊🐰

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

I'm here Maria!! , a bit like a bad penny !😊😘

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply toBazzak

I hope you noticed I was being nice to you. I thought I was feeling a bit unwell today...... 😘😄

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toMadBunny

😁😘x

bobbybobb profile image
bobbybobbAmbassador

I like the suture yourself. 😁🤣

thara9643 profile image
thara9643

You make me chuckle

Sheila_G profile image
Sheila_G

😂😂

Sanpedro2019 profile image
Sanpedro2019

Excellent .......... when a wife she will be ready in 15 minutes she will be no use reminding her every half an hour

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply toSanpedro2019

😁

Lol 😁😁

Gillyflower18 profile image
Gillyflower18

🤣🤣🤣

chrisj profile image
chrisj in reply toGillyflower18

How do you make the smilies??? I keep meaning to ask....

Gillyflower18 profile image
Gillyflower18 in reply tochrisj

They are part of the emojis on my iPhone.

chrisj profile image
chrisj in reply toGillyflower18

Ah right, thank you. I dont have one so that explains it. I searched the site for them, no wonder I couldnt find any....lol

coat2003 profile image
coat2003

you funny devil. more jokes pls.

chrisj profile image
chrisj

Hahahahahaha!!!

Ochg profile image
Ochg

Thank you Bazzak this has really helped me today 🤗

Smiler53 profile image
Smiler53

So Funny 😂. That cartoon - my husband always caught out our nieces and nephews with that one. Loved the jokes too.

The ability to reply to this post has been turned off.

Not what you're looking for?

You may also like...

Modern technology and old age doesn't always go smoothly

Ok they are bad!! 😊 I went to an Eskimo restaurant in London and asked the waiter about the...
Bazzak profile image
Reading Rabbits

You have done it now girls !! You have upset my old mum and she's on to you!!😊😊

Dad’s advice some years ago; “If you get into a fight in the pub, put a snooker ball in your...
Bazzak profile image
Reading Rabbits

Me, after taking the abuse from Marnie22 and the rest of you ladies yesterday!!!

"I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any." "A man walked...
Bazzak profile image
Reading Rabbits

Scam

Hi guys, I have had a bad day and I don't want sympathy or anything I just want to tell you to be...

Well they all like fish!! ( and some cringe jokes 😊)

A piece of black tarmac and a piece of pink tarmac are having a drink in a pub. Suddenly there's a...
Bazzak profile image
Reading Rabbits

Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.

Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.