One night Dave's Wife awakes in absolute Agony "Quick Dave, call the Doctor, it's my Appendix" so Dave gets on the 'Blower'. Unusually the Doctor himself answers, so Dave explains... "Relax David" says the Doctor "your Wife had her Appendix removed Eight years ago. In all my thirty-five years, as a Doctor, I have Never heard of 'anyone' having a Second one". "What about having a Second Wife!" says Dave.
I hope I raised a Smile.
AndrewT
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Hi
Are you ok? Are you struggling tonight?
You certainly made me smile 😊🤣 the cbg, CBD, magnesium and vitamin d aren't working tonight but at least I have been sleeping. If I only get say 3 good nights, it's certainly much better than I was getting and will help me cope with the pain during the day!!!
Take care and stay safe Lynne
I'm 'Alright' Lynne.... but it's now 1:25 am....I think I'll head back to bed.
Perhaps, you and me, can 'Burn A Bit More Midnight Oil' sometime? I might even Tell you a few more Jokes (😬)... like 'Why Did The Mexican Shoot His Wife'.... Toquilla! (to kill her). Why did the Mexican go into Carpet Land.... Underlay, Underlay, Underlay.....
Finally, since the weather IS Supposed to be getting Cooler..... Two Snowmen are talking- one, says to the other "Can you smell Carrots?".
Finally one about an Essex Girl..... I come from Essex myself, I'm also 'Blond' (well 'Tan'). A Blond Essex girl, is sitting in the 'middle' of a field, in a Rowing Boat. A second Essex Girl calls over "It's girls, like YOU, that give the rest of us a Bad Name". The first girl calls back, rather belligerently "Well why don't YOU, come over and 'Sort ME out then'". The which the second replies "Well I Can't SWIM, can I?".
Time now 1:40 and I AM off to bed.... Good Night Lynne.
AndrewT
🤣😂
It's now 01:55 and I'm nowhere near sleeping tonight 👎 I bet there's a few others who would come on here as well. At least I had some sleep over the weekend and last night as well. I'm keeping my 🤞🤞🤞🤞 that tonight is just a one off!! I'm sure my hubby would join in as well but he's in the land of nod!! Lucky so and so!!
Night night
Sleep well
It's now, just after, 5 am..... my right arm is 'Playing Up', my Skin is Itching like Bu--ery.... I bought a Huge, the biggest they had, E45 cream earlier. So it should, at least, start to Settle soon. I'm seeing the Dermy, on Friday, I'll see what she says. It's ALL this Hand Washing, and especially, these Alcohol Hand Sanitisers that is 'Doing' it.
The Great Late- forever Missed- Tommy Cooper said that he..... Went to the Doctor, with a Rash, the Doctor asked "Have you had this before" when Cooper indicated that he had, the Doctor continued "Well you have 'got' it again then".
Cooper Knocked Up, a guesthouse, late one night. The Landlady opened a window, before calling "What do you want?" Cooper replied "I want to 'Stay' here". The Landlady replied "Ok, Stay there" and closed the window!
A 'School' of small Fish, are swimming along, when a youngster comes over, with a tin,,,,, "Anyone want to play 'Sardines'?"
Cleaver one, for you.... What really Stinks and sounds like a bell? DUNG.
Talking of Diseases.... My mate opened his Bedroom Window and 'In Flew Enza'.
I've 'Posted' this before but I think it has the Right 'Balance' of Stupidity, and Nastiness. A man is walking down the street, it doesn't matter where, when he hears 'Twenty-one, Twenty-one, Twenty-one.......' coming from behind the fence he is walking alongside. Intrigued he puts his eye, up to a Small 'Knott' Hole, and tries to peer through. Almost immediately a finger 'Pokes' him roughly, in the eye, causing him to Pull Back quickly. As he is rubbing his, by now rather sore, eye the voice begins again 'Twenty-two, Twenty-two, Twenty-two......
Time now almost 5:40 am and I'm Hungry, in fact, I could eat a horse..... Maybe some Jaffa Cakes instead.
Night, Night again
AndrewT
Smile I did.
Thats so good!
I moved and changed doctors between wives - so the medics did not get confused.
...but my late wife did come to the attention of the medics at my previous "marital home"...
When I had only known my late (second) wife a few weeks, she phoned me and told me she was ill... I thought I could not abandon my cat and move in with her, so I brought her back to my place.
She was a ballet school principle, and, while she was ill, she had a Royal Academy of Dance Exam session... she said the girls had worked hard for the exams all year, the exams had cost her money and she was going to have to cancel...
So I said:
"No, it is OK I will cope"
So I had dozens of young ladies to cope with!
That morning, I rushed out of the house, leaving the kitchen looking like a tip...
She had phoned her mother and told her where she was - and her mother got her brother to drive her over!
Brilliant 😂
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Me, after taking the abuse from Marnie22 and the rest of you ladies yesterday!!!
My turn for a corny joke.