The following transcript was released by the Chief of British Naval Operations in 1995, from a recorded radio conversation overheard at sea near the coast of British Columbia.
NAVY VOICE: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collison.
CIVLIAN VOICE: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collison.
NAVY VOICE: This is the captain of a US navy ship. I say again, divert your course.
CIVLIAN VOICE: No. I say again, divert your course.
NAVY VOICE: This is the aircraft carrier Enterprise. We are a large warship of the US Navy. Divert your course now!
CIVLIAN VOICE: This is a lighthouse. Your call.
Seeking Solace and inner peace 
HAPPY EARTH DAY! Where were you on the very first Earth Day?
Doctors receptionists can be scary.