Near my 80th birthday and usually when things go wrong I say “Oh well, never mind”. Just recently, on 60 mg Prednisolone, after a usual disrespectful comment from a family member (been going on for years) I suddenly found my ‘voice’ and said things that had been a long time coming.
“Oh well, never mind” had been overtaken by this inner demon. Has anyone else experienced this?
Not sure how I feel, still a bit angry as well as suprised.
Did also have an episode when I was on 60mg… whilst waiting in a very slow queue in a garden centre! But it was short-lived and soon forgotten by all.
Yours might not be forgotten so quickly as it was a family member… but it’s happened now so let it lie. No point fretting about it… and it might have made the other person think twice about their comments.
It was something of a relief. Before that even my son-in- law had said I should not be treated like that. Thank you for your advice on ‘letting it lie’. A part of me is still very unrepentant as well as a bit stunned. Great advice and friendship in ,this forum.
And people joke about ‘roid rage’! Yes sometimes it’s embarrassing or risks a punch in the nose. Sometimes I think it’s a little helper in order to find one’s voice that debatably shouldn’t have been silenced by others either. The consequences can be difficult but perhaps the truth needs to be out. It can have the same effect as having a few drinks too many.
Thank you for that SnazxyD. I was so so surprised at myself, usually accused of being too mild in my responses.
Silencing oneself for years isn’t healthy either but it would be nice to get a warning about when we upset the family dynamic apple cart!
In certain circles, grey rocking can be a great technique for managing annoying people, but I do think that some people need a warning shot over the bows now and again to pull them up.
Grey rocking ?
healthline.com/health/grey-...
Thank you, I didn’t know about ‘the grey rock’ and had to look it up. It does work and has eased the situation. Before my steroid outburst I had not realised how complicated the other person was but now know they had had temper outbursts before but myself and others had managed to avoid these by mild responses.
You are a font of excellent information, thank you again.
It is basically not giving an emotional response to people who are seeking attention and drama. If they don't get the response, they are looking for, usually they pass on to someone else to get their gratification. Essentially, you don't engage and you become a grey rock. It can work in the short term and it often works well with bullies. Arguably, it is not that good for you, if you have to do that long term, which is why I said that sometimes, you just have to let them have both barrels. Though in my view, if someone else's behaviour is so toxic that you are prevented from being your authentic self, then it may be time to review whether it is worth having that person in your life. It is the main reason that I have very little to do with my family. I think this is still on topic, since it has crossed my mind long before now, to wonder how much of my family's shenanigans over the years has added to the stress that I think gave me PMR in the first place.
Oh yes - "roid rage". My granddaughter knew all about THAT when she was on high dose pred repeatedly for brittle asthma. The medical-orientated family knew all about it - but Opa wasn't amused. I was even easier to rouse than usual - never suffered fools gladly anyway but on even 15mg pred was very snappy. But if it is any comfort, PMR without pred had almost exactly the same effect.
However - if it might help, make sure info about pred side effects is available. Explain if you want/need to and don't let it simmer.
it feels to me that it is something you have wanted to say for a while and from your son in laws comment needed to be said. Do you feel a bit better now it's out in the open. You can walk away from toxic friends, but much harder with family so maybe it needed to happen and the pred just helped you on your way 😉
Thank you!
Well done you - that family member might engage brain before opening mouth next time. More down to approaching 80'th than prednisolone I would have thought!!
Yes I was thinking that. It sounds like about time you spoke your mind. Maybe it is more a case of steroids courage than rage
I like that, steroid courage. 😄
Oh yes! On 60 mg I was impossible. I had zero patience with anyone, especially people who thought I was just a bit poorly and if I took the pills I’d recover. ‘Do pop in to the BBQ tomorrow if you’re up to it.’ What’s wrong with that, a kind offer but I’d already told this person I was laid up on the sofa. I think I was totally irrational, struggling to understand what was happening to me and impatient with anyone else who hadn’t a clue. Terrible period. It will get better for you.
well done, sometimes these things brew up and just have to come out!
Hope your cataract goes as well as they usually do.
Doesn’t sound like a demon. More like your authentic self biting back.
Prednisalone does have irritability in its side effects and I have certainly noticed a lack of patience in myself and possibly a clearer articulation of what has annoyed me. I wouldn’t worry too much, they probably had it coming by the sound of it.
Oh thank you so much. It really was a long time coming but up to then had just let it go, year in year out.
Good for you! X
Hi Rotsky, with family I haven't had a big rage -yet-did in a supermarket! Eek...but in the past few months as pred leads to other conditions and suffering continues, family and Some friends, seem less tolerant or understanding of my situation. So I seem to be having lots of little ones! I feel they understand fine so long as it doesn't impact them but otherwise its almost like they think I should buck up! Hey-ho. Hope they never have to experience similar. Hope you feel better soon. Soubds like it was well needed x
Ohhh Yes! Goes away on lower dosages - for me under 15 mg
Absolutely........!!!! My inner demon reigned superior for about 6 months. I was on 65mg Pred for 4 weeks then 60 mg for 12 weeks then started to reduce. I was absolutely psychotic during that time, I was totally aware of things I was saying and doing but had no way of stopping them. As my dose receded so did my psychosis but it has left me terribly scarred emotionally as very afraid of ever having to repeat that dosage.
I tend to avoid loss of dignity generally, even when feeling impatient or annoyed. Wouldn't say that I am any more volatile on pred, but I would say that I have become more brave and honest, as a few people have found out when they got on my nerves. Though I'm not sure how much of that is the pred and how much that was due to menopause. Getting rid of all that oestrogen has certainly made me a lot more forthright in the last 15 years, than I used to be, and it has been a blessed relief.
oh yes, when I was on 20mgs or thereabouts, I could blow up over the least thing. Yours seems like a legitimate reason.
My daughter used to refer to it as my roid rage!
Being on 60mg and presumably having PMR I wonder if you go through the strange emotional cycles that I have on my meagre 7.5? It is more than fatigue and affects my ability to absorb the emotional bumps of the day, really understand what is going on for the people around me and give them the support they need. As others have pointed out one doesn't appear ill with PMR and it doesn't attract sympathy. Do they really understand what you have and what it means for you? You can always send them DL's excellent summary of it to help them work out what's happening - I did. Good luck and certainly don't feel badly about it.
By the way my painting efforts are marvellous for keeping me grounded. If anyone else does it or wants to try I'd be happy to be in touch with you.
Oh yeah! Roid rage! At higher doses my family used to retreat. My son calls me his little dragon and my hubby used to say my inner Rottweiler had been released. Now I am on lower dose of 4mg my inner calm is better but sometimes, just sometimes the dragon spits a bit of fire 😂
Feel the power! Yes it does seem to go with the steroid territory, but it can be a blessing. Don't be repentant, but now you know you can speak out you can be brave enough to do so when needed.
yes, i understand so well....even on lower levels now after 13 yrs..it makes me moody and harder to keep my mouth shut...lol
Good for you, in my experience my family seem to think that because you are family they can behave how they like and say what they want with no repercussions at all. At one point I went totally no contact with them all and it was great but only lasted about 6 weeks. I don't think family would treat their friends how they treat their family.
Gosh! I’m sooooo with you . In fact I’m down to 8.5 pred and still having explosive outbursts. I have had 3 almost terminal rows recently - two with family members 😱. Like you, I’m usually in favour of keeping the peace and not making my voice heard so actually it’s been quite liberating even though there remain a few things I wish I’d not said. I’ve decided that it’s probably a good thing overall although it’s made me super conscious of watching out when I feel that ‘roidrage’ coming on.
In your case I wouldn’t worry. It sounds like whatever you said needed to be said in response to a ‘disrespectful comment’.
I think in some respects it is a good thing. I didn’t regret anything I said . So fast and furious tho . The first event shocked me and my husband so much . Our eyes popped out , we remained silent staring at each other then burst into hysterical laughter .
🤣👍🏼
Yes I did in the early stages on 15mgs. Shocked us all. Stress went on for days and days, while on holiday with another couple . Wife was forever bringing the vibe down . The inner demon let loose , emptied the stress can ! I wandered off in my mind, didn’t know who I was , where I was or who I was in a car with . (Hawaii). They all took on board what the demon said and we are still friends today.
I am now down to 3.5 mgs and that demon comes back quick and fierce lately. I do hope she gets put to bed soon.
Hello, Rotsky. I say, "good for you" if you have been quietly putting up with disrespectful comments from a family member for years! Please don't think of "your voice" as an inner demon but rather a person who has finally said what needed to be said and no apology from you necessary. I applaud and support you! YOU GO GIRL! And if steroids were the catalyst, I say let's list that as a positive side effect. "People may find the courage to say what they have been wanting and needing to say for years".
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