Over reactoin: Do you think my son is over... - PMRGCAuk

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Over reactoin

Scotty7 profile image
43 Replies

Do you think my son is over reacting, he has dropped my 2 year old grandson off for the night , i have a cold...No cough,No sore throat, slight headache as you would expect with a cold. No temperature , now he is thinking of coming to pick him.up

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Scotty7
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43 Replies
Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell

No i dont think he is over reacting. Surely apart from protecting yourself your next priority should be your family, i know mine is. The elderly amd the young are most at risk so your grandson comes into that bracket. YBB

Scotty7 profile image
Scotty7 in reply toYellowbluebell

Ok. I have a runny nose..thats it. My other daughter in law is nurse she has spoken to a doctor in A& E 5 min ago. This is his coment; If i have not traveled to any of the effective areas ( i have not )

and i have no dry cough then i am completely fine....i also look after the daughter in lawsc1 year old twice a week

If she thought i was that ill trust me she would have my grandson out of the house in minutes. Thank you for your comemts

krillemy profile image
krillemy in reply toScotty7

This is how it all started here in Denmark Copenhagen. Now we are as Italy and under lockdown. The doctors all said that and had their lists of "infected areas" but guess what - they do not know where the next area will be on till it is too late. That said, the virus is not dangerous for a 2 years old. Lastly - it comes in many forms. From no symptoms, light colds, real flu symptoms, cough and difficulty breathing. There is only the test to distinguish it from other vira.

in reply tokrillemy

The under 9s so far haven't been as heavily infected and it seems there are no fatalities reported yet but that doesn't mean the 2yr old can't be infected and pass it on to an over 9yr old child or an adult. Asymptomatic carriers can cause illness and deaths.

krillemy profile image
krillemy in reply to

You are right, the child should off cause be kept away from others than the grandmother after being picked up

Blearyeyed profile image
Blearyeyed

I agree with YB.

If you aren't well , no matter what it is , looking after a little one will only make you more run down, make the cold worse, and in turn leave you open to a flare in PMR symptoms , and more vulnerable to catch something else , or in need of a Doctor , a visit you would probably prefer not to have to do in the current climate.

In relation to your grandson , you wouldn't want to possibly give him a cold , affecting his immunity , especially if that cold could prevent him from being able to go out , or go to crèche or nursery facilities while his parents are at work if they use them.

They probably don't want to be put into the position to have to give up work and self isolate for a week if their child does catch a cold , or they catch it , as that is part of current advice.

Unfortunately , we do have to consider the effect of minor infections on our systems and everybody else's right now not just Covid 19.

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toBlearyeyed

I agree Blearyeyed. Under the present circumstances we should try not to pass anything on, that's from a common cold to something more serious.

scats profile image
scats

Such a shame, but these are not normal times and we are all going to have to learn think differently unfortunately.

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell

They have diagnosed people who have supposedly not been in contact with the virus nor been out of the country so i personally would not risk my grandchild.YBB

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toYellowbluebell

Me neither.

Tbh... I just don't think it's worth the risk. Even without a cold I wouldn't have children with me at the moment, For my benefit as much as theirs! As scats says we, for the moment, have to learn to think differently. I am not seeing friends and family because fir every close contact I have with them , that's a contact with EVERYONE they have had close contact with for up to 3 weeks if some reports of incubation are to be believed. If it was December I would say yes, he was over reacting for cold symptoms.... But at the moment, if it were my baby I would probably err on the side of caution as he is doing. Its not personal or a slur on your child care, its primal and instinctive.

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply to

The incubation period is now up to 27 days possibly!!, maybe!!

in reply toYellowbluebell

It's everywhere even with a shorter incubation. With 27days...do you know who you wrrr in close contact with a month ago.. Or who they were with and where they've been etc.. Etc.... The map shows cases on every continent.

Jan_Noack profile image
Jan_Noack in reply to

I read somewhere they found a cse where it took 34 days to be symptomic... and now I can't recall but still the aussies politicians (PM) has just decided that handshaking should be avoided..a few days ago he said it was OK..and a few days ago govts were saying whats with this 14-day nonsense we'll do 5 days.. and now they ay 14 day.. but its self done...and not checked. (rant over)

EDit: Here theguardian.com/world/2020/... Don't foget that 14 day rule is only 97.5% (they think) of cases, so at least 2 SD's, or perhaps more as data collection is not that precise. I'd err of the side of caution a little.

Scotty7 profile image
Scotty7

His mum is happy for him to stay,

in reply toScotty7

I think that's a discussion they need to have. I know its very disappointing but its hopefully just a precaution for this weekend.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador

No wonder the UK is getting in a mess if they are STILL thinking you have to have been to an affected country ...

in reply toPMRpro

I think the Dr needs my prod.

Blearyeyed profile image
Blearyeyed in reply toPMRpro

Or been in contact with the person who went there. It is far more of a six degrees of separation thing.

I suppose A and E Doctors are more of a mindset for giving people advice based on who should visit A and E , or the GP, rather than how to prevent reducing your immunity at Home , or protecting your Family from catching a cold that forces them to stay off work even if it isn't Covid 19. It's the knock on effect for work and child care for non vulnerable people that count too isn't it.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toBlearyeyed

But there are probably 20,000 plus people in the UK who are carrying it with no obvious signs at all ...

in reply toPMRpro

Shudder

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

Thats what i thought. Its just doesnt stack up that advice any more!!

Scotty7 profile image
Scotty7

Thanks for your response, you seem to be seeing it from my point if view. I am not angry with my son i just think he is being over cautious, like his mum said she is happy for him to stay, she knows if i start to feel more unwell i will ring them my daughter is also her at home and she is fine

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toScotty7

I didnt realise you were asking for us to agree with you. Everyone who answered you gave out their opinion your sons actions which is i believe what you asked. We wouldnt have answered had we known it was irrelevant to you. YBB

in reply toYellowbluebell

Ditto

It something we did years ago when my mum had cancer. When chemo and radiotherapy snuffed her immune system we always did health checks both ways. I am sure others can draw on that sort of experience in their lives. It's just a case of weighing up the risks and sometimes those risks aren't worth it, and other times they are. Once my mum was obviously terminal I went anyway to spend time together ... Context matters everytime.

I am sorry you didn't get to see your babies and their babies. Especially getting in the car! Very disappointing.

Omg. Thats terrible. poor mum!

GOOD_GRIEF profile image
GOOD_GRIEF

You can and will decide to do whatever you like, but be aware that you have an immune condition that is not conducive to battling off viruses. Even if it is just a cold, you're likely to infect your grandchild with it, who will infect his parents - one of whom is a medic.

All of them are, to some extent, out in the world at this point. Having a cold will not enhance their immune response to the virus, and won't help any people they pass your cold on to. Quite the opposite.

There's more to consider than just your family unit.

maria40 profile image
maria40

I had been having my grandson regularly on Sundays while his mother worked in London. Two weeks ago I said that I didn't think this was wise for either of us and my daughter is still very frosty with me as she thinks that was an over reaction but I think in view of what is happening now it was perfectly justified.

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply tomaria40

You were not just thinking of you and if you did get something and gave it to yourgrandchild your daughter wouldn't forgive you and you wouldn't forgive yourself. Being a little bit cautious may just protect you and himxxYBB

Blearyeyed profile image
Blearyeyed in reply tomaria40

Just remind her now new rules are coming in you are doing it for her as much as yourself. If you had a cold yourself and passed it on to her or her child she may be asked to take time off work to self isolate because of it. Or if you get rundown taking care of a child , which we all can even if we do it regularly , you are less able to cope with a virus too. It makes sense at the moment even if it's hard on the heartstrings.

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell

Glad you got to see your dad and that you and mum survived the noro virus.x

Blearyeyed profile image
Blearyeyed

That's the point I think people are forgetting .

It's not just making sure that you don't spread Covid 19 , it's making sure that you don't catch or spread other colds , bugs or flu as these can have an effect on your immunity and make you rundown , which isn't the best condition to be in if you were unfortunate enough to get the Coronavirus.

Plus healthy young people are having to think financially , nobody can really afford to take a week off work because of the self isolation rules because they have the symptoms of a cold caught from their parents or their children. Employers are going to be very strict in future weeks about letting people come into work with signs of a cold.

It may seem like things are being too over protective but its the way it will be for some time , so it's not worth taking the chance for anyone with their health or financially when there is a hint of a cold around.

Boss302Fan profile image
Boss302Fan in reply toBlearyeyed

Agreed. We can’t stop the spread of the virus until we stop the transmission thereof.

When one interacts with another they have no knowledge with whom they have had contact, or whom those individuals have had contact, and it expands outward. We have people in this country going to movie theaters! Of course the Governor of our state shut those down (a little late I’d say).

It only takes 1 individual to infect many others. We need to take to heart and make decisions that will reduce that to as near zero as possible.

That means, putting others first (novel concept) and not do things that will put either of us at risk.

I will keep my fingers crossed. It is worrying but hopefully things can be put in place like ordering food for her etc.

Yes I can relate. A friend in her mid 80s is in denial. She thi ks I am joking when I said I can't risk sitting in a car with her to take her out with the dog just yet, especially as her daughter Nd son in law visited from Portugal lsst week. Her neighbours are brilliant but I know she will stand touching their arm and playing with the baby, who goes to nursery everyday. She is an ex nurse who got Hong Kong!/Asian flu years ago and wS hospitalised after nursing children with it. Worst potential and realised patients!! Ex nurses and Dr's.

HeronNS profile image
HeronNS

I would give anything to be able to be with my little granddaughter. Unfortunately I cannot because she lives so far away. With the way things are we have no idea when we will see her again. That being said, if she were here in this city and I were coming down with a cold I would not let her parents leave her with me. I would wait until my cold was gone. And I live in a place where there have not yet been any known cases of covid-19. These are extraordinary times and call for extraordinary measures. Sorry. That's just the way it is.

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell

Like poopadoopy i will keep my fingers crossed for her. Xx

SheffieldJane profile image
SheffieldJane

I think he’s being a sensible dad Scotty7. For your sake and your grandson’s. Get well soon.

Mimigirl19 profile image
Mimigirl19

No not at all. My husband is 87 today and for the first time ever we will not be celebrating as a family. We will not even be seeing our daughter and grown up grandsons. We had all planned a celebratory pub meal tonight. Instead although showing no symptoms we have self isolated from a week ago just in case.... It’s hard but our grandson is a 3rd year medical student and agrees it’s the right decision. We are both in the at risk category. I believe the government should be more proactive rather than reactive. My shopping is always delivered weekly so that’s covered. It’s a tough decision to make but the right one for us, although some may consider it extreme. We will celebrate together as a family when hopefully things improve.

Thelmarina profile image
Thelmarina in reply toMimigirl19

I know. You watch all the lovely family occasions fall like dominoes, especially with Easter coming. However it is what it is and I’m concentrating on the thought of the biggest ever celebratory family party when all this passes over - however long it takes! 😀

Linlang profile image
Linlang

He is right.

My Cousin and his wife. Have been told by dr son and daughter

No contact and self isolate

You are 70plus with health issues.

Daffodilia profile image
Daffodilia

Yes - the main symptom is cough and fever for C 19 - young children are least affected - over 70s won’t want to lose all their contacts

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