Sometimes it gets hard.

[JulianJ]

On Sunday I had to do a 2 hour drive, it wasn't expected and no time to prepare.

I only drove 1 way, but even that used all of my energy and more. Getting out of the car at the end of my drive was a laugh, but nothing compared to when I got home. And that wasn't the end of the day, still had another 30 mins of driving to do.

I had to collect my daughter from Uni so that she could go to the doctor for a sick note, the things we do for others.

I do have to say a big thank you to my son who drove the return trip, no way could I have done that without sleeping on the side of the road.

Today I'm feeling a little more like myself, well the PMR me!

[Hidden]

We get by with a little help from our friends (family).

[JulianJ in reply to Hidden]

A little help!

You're right, they give us so much and as for nothing in return. People who understand where we are are a real bonus to us and make life so much easier.

[Soraya_PMR in reply to JulianJ]

I heard a lovely quote in an Italian film last night, ‘you incur debt at the bank, but not from friends’ or in your case family.

Congrats on managing the 2 hours one way! I do a 45 minute there, and 2 hours later 45 minute drive back twice a week, and that’s as much as I can manage. I need an extra cushion for my bum/hips, and my arms/shoulders object strongly. I feel it the next day.

[JulianJ in reply to Soraya_PMR]

It was hard work, even sitting in the car on the way back. The next few days my calves hurt, but it was a trip I had to do. I wish it had been my car, at least cruise control could have been used.

And you are right about debt and family/friends

[Hidden in reply to JulianJ]

I have an automatic with cruise control. Makes long journeys so much easier. My left leg became unreliable a few years ago from another problem. Even though it is a four wheel drive I miss the control of gears in the snow. The last bit of snow we had I burst a tyre sliding down a hill at traffic lights and instead of slowing I speeded up! It was the kerb or smash into the traffic at a t junction. Took me a couple of weeks to get my confidence back!

[HeronNS in reply to Hidden]

Yikes!

[JulianJ in reply to Hidden]

Now I prefer the automatic in the snow. Well my Shogun was good, not so sure about the Jeep I have now. The Shogun had a proper rear diff lock, the Jeep has a LSD, not so sure about that.

[Hidden in reply to JulianJ]

I think mine is really a pretend 4 wheel drive. It's the all4 mini CooperAD countryman. It doesn't have winter tyres which would have helped like the big shogun does. It's great for "rallying" in deeper snow but for some reason 2inches of slushy snow don't suit. I naughtily took it up a hill in peaks off road one day and it pulled like a train on rough land. My 80yr old friend loved it lol. I have to change the mini and am waiting for delivery of new seat Leon fr estate so suspect no more playing off the road.🙁

[PMRpro Ambassador in reply to Hidden]

I'd rather have a manual FWD with snow tyres - which is what I have! The worst bit here tends to be getting out of the garage!!! The ramps here are megasteep - and we don't have underfloor heating on it unfortunately!!!!

[markbenjamin57 in reply to PMRpro]

I agree, PMRpro / (Julian) - subject close to my heart.

Manual FWD vehicles are usually safer and more predictable for most drivers in wet & icy conditions because the weight of the engine is directly over the driven wheels, increasing traction (grip). AWD are similar in that traction is automatically / electronically distributed between all 4 wheels simultaneously.

I took a skid-pan driving course a few years ago, where we compared the predictability of handling between FWD and RWD cars in slippery conditions. The FWD always won. That said, a few of us motoring 'Purists' agree that you can't beat a good RWD set-up in a performance car, so long as it's in capable hands! I'm sure Julian will relate to this with his MX5...

[HeronNS in reply to JulianJ]

Time, methinks, to start hinting to my lovely sons that my living room really must be repainted this summer....

[JulianJ in reply to HeronNS]

I have a whole hose than needs decorating, being rewired now and then all the fun starts. My daughter is looking forward to the work, not sure if my son is

[HeronNS in reply to JulianJ]

Actually if we ever want to sell we'll need to rewire. I think we should do it asap but tell that to my husband. The thought of living in a house with this kind of work going on doesn't appeal to either of us.

[JulianJ in reply to HeronNS]

They've been at it for 2 weeks now.

Glad it isn't the house we live in. Full rewire with loads of sockets and power out to the shed. Just hope there isn't to much work for us to do afterwards, we will be filling the holes etc.

Then the whole place needs to be decorated.

[HeronNS in reply to JulianJ]

I don't know why with our house they couldn't just fish new wires through the walls. We have a very up to date electrical panel. Perhaps we should actually talk to an electrician rather than just dreading the prospect!

[JulianJ in reply to HeronNS]

When I took a quick look around on Sunday, there was very little in the way of holes or channels. Plenty of dust. Will be interesting to see what it is like when it's finished.

[PMRpro Ambassador in reply to HeronNS]

I think that is a VERY good idea. Old wiring really is a fire waiting to happen. And you can always say no, not yet.

[HeronNS in reply to PMRpro]

An electrician did inspect the house a few years ago and said we should have wiring redone when we moved out, we didn't need to do it before. But I think we will be living in this house longer than anyone expected at the time.

[JulianJ in reply to PMRpro]

Talking of fire, I'm having mains powered smoke detectors fitted as well.

What made me decide to rewire was the cable running across the wall, at and angle then through to a double socked. From the socket a spur to another socket and an extension to another socked. The cable came out of the consumer unit and just hung across the wall. That told me I couldn't trust any of the wiring. Get an electrician in and get it sorted and safe, after all my daughter will be living in the house.

Costing £4k, but what is a life worth?

[Hidden]

Well done! Drives without due notice kill me off.

[JulianJ in reply to Hidden]

I don't mind jumping into the car and driving, just can't do the long ones now.

I nearly had to take my daughter back on Tuesday, wasn't looking forward to that, snow and PMR, that would have been fun. Luckily the snow stopped and I didn't need to make the drive

[PMRpro Ambassador in reply to JulianJ]

I do almost all the driving with the car, OH does the camper van. I'm fine up to about 4-5 hours even now. So trips to the UK are planned around the restaurants/hotels we have identified in the past. Never fails...

[SheffieldJane]

I can so relate to that Julian. It is so embarrassing getting out of the car like an old crock. Glad that your children ( well one of them) is giving back some of the loving care he’s had from you. My son registered temporarily with a Uni doctor - not that he ever went, might that prevent this happening again? Mind you, sometimes they just need to be the child of the house for a little while again. If only that option was open to us. Glad you’re getting your mojo back.

[JulianJ in reply to SheffieldJane]

My son has a panda, not to bad to get in and out of, you should see me getting out of my MX5, even worse with its hardtop on! More of a pour out than get out!

Both my kids are good, my daughter couldn't do much as she was ill, she slept on the way back. She didn't want me to come and collect her, but she had no choice, well not from me anyway.

[SheffieldJane in reply to JulianJ]

I hope that she has made a full recovery. It’s a worry when they are away from home.

[JulianJ in reply to SheffieldJane]

She's good and back in Uni, flu, staying in a cold room, kids what can you do with them.

At least now she is back in her warm room and fit to get her work done.

[markbenjamin57]

Hi Julian

Well, if it helps, that sounds pretty 'normal' with PMR! On the positive side, it should get better gradually, but the main thing is that you're being careful with the driving and not taking risks of nodding-off at the wheel (not advised!).

Even now (2-ish years into PMR and at a low level of Preds), if I drive for a couple of hours I feel whacked-out mentally and tumble out of the car awkwardly at the end of a journey. Just a reminder of how much this illness saps your mental AND physical energy - and of course, any additional Stress doesn't help!

Keep smiling and enjoy a well deserved rest after your Mercy Mission

MB

[JulianJ in reply to markbenjamin57]

It was a fun drive, I do like the A470 and A44, that alone reduces the mental drain, but the physical drain is big.

I was returning when I noticed I was tired, the car in front suddenly was closer than it should have been, still a good distance, but a wake up call. Stopped for a sleep and carried on. My son was with me, but insured to drive my cars.

I'm heading towards 7mg for the second time, with luck this time I'll make it.