Urethral burning and vaginal pain after penetration (longer post, first time posting)

[Sweetlolly11]

I'm 25 F and I've not yet had sexual intercourse with a man, but I have been using sex toys for about 3 or 4 years now. I have not been using penetrative toys very frequently, but a lot of the time that I have used them, they were more painful than pleasurable (which is why I didn't like them). Lubrication was never the issue, more like I feel a burning sensation from the actual movement and presence of the toy inside me.

But my true problem started about 5 days ago. I used a penetrative toy for 2 days in a row. The very first day after I was done using it, during which I surprisingly had no significant pain, I went to pee and out of nowhere the pain that I felt was literally BURNING like a flame, and I could not tell if it was coming from my urethra or my vagina. I thought my vagina was just sore from not enduring any penetration in a long time, so I didn't think much of it, and the pain slowly subsided throughout the rest of the day. I used the toy again the next day, and I could tell the area was sore, so I didn't use it as long. The very next day, my problems started: burning sensation during urination (especially at the end of urinating), a feeling of urgency to urinate that never stops and keeps me sat on the toilet for a long time, feeling like my bladder is always bursting etc. The first two days I only felt it in my urethra, and since then (this is day 5) I feel a general sense of discomfort and almost like period-like cramps in my bladder or uterine area (I am not sure). The thing is I can be fine for the most of the day, with only a slight discomfort in the urethra when I urinate (not even every time I do), and then at some point, usually at night, and especially if I've been sat for a while and not been drinking as much, I get overwhelmed by a sense of urgency and run to the toilet with almost nothing coming out of my bladder and just a lot of burning pain. I have to force myself to go sit down in my chair again, ignoring the feeling, and struggle for an hour or two before the pain goes away, otherwise I just keep going to the toilet and the pain keeps getting worse, but holding it in when I have nothing left to pee out and suffering in silence is the only thing that gets it to calm down again and almost feel perfectly normal after a while. I also feel discomfort, slight itchiness and pain inside my vagina, around the inside of the opening itself.

I contacted my doctor, the lab did a urine analysis and found absolutely nothing, no bacteria or fungus. She told me to take an antibiotic just in case, which I'm not fond of unless there's absolutely a need for it, and told me if it doesn't get better by next week, I'm going to have to see a gynecologist. I've never been to a gynecologist except for one ovary ultrasound years ago that happened through my tummy anyway due to me being a virgin, to check for PCOS which I don't have, so I have no idea what to expect or think. After doing thorough research on the internet and given the fact my very limited experience with penetration has resulted in pain most of the time, I thought maybe pelvic floor dysfunction is something I might have. Does this sound like it could be it?

I'm going off of these facts: 1. painful penetration most of the time, even if I'm being gentle, careful and have enough lubrication (besides, it's just me, so I am relaxed), 2. the burning urethra has only started happening now, for the first time in my life, after using a penetrative toy for the first time in a very long time, 3. they found nothing weird in my urine, 4. the pain isn't always there, it only happens if I've been sitting for a long time and/or not drinking enough, 5. holding it in and waiting makes the pain subside. I've also noticed pressing my hand against my genital area and just keeping pressure seems to help, but that might be placebo.

I am so tired because I've been getting 5-6 hours of sleep a night. I literally pass out because I'm so tired while waiting for the pain go away as it's usually there only by night, and then wake up for no reason way too soon, usually to a painless existence. And then the night comes at some point.

Any help and pointers greatly appreciated.

[kalecolbe12]

Does sound like it could be pelvic floor dysfunction... you may need to go to a pelvic floor physical therapist for an assessment

[Sweetlolly11 in reply to kalecolbe12]

Thank you so much for your reply! Could you by any chance tell me what an assessment like that looks like?

[kalecolbe12 in reply to Sweetlolly11]

She will assess your hips your pelvic area the sacral area and your glutes and she will more than likely have to go in and do some interior vaginal checking to see if she can find any myofascial trigger points but don't be embarrassed this they do this every day all day

[Sweetlolly11 in reply to kalecolbe12]

thank you so much for your help!

[lolatx]

I agree with Kalecolbe12. It’s probably pelvic floor dysfunction - hypertonic muscles. The only thing I would add is that normally the muscles are tight in reaction to something else going on. It would be very rare for you to have muscle tightness in the pelvic floor and that’s it. Some causes can be endometriosis, nerve damage from an accident, anxiety or trauma, etc. - I would definitely go to pelvic floor physical therapy but also dig a little deeper and ensure you are finding the root cause of the tension.

[Sweetlolly11 in reply to lolatx]

thank you for your response. how rare is it to find a specialist in this department? how would i even get started? will a visit to a regular gynecologist be any good?

also: i have a slipped disk in my lower back region. could that be the reason why my muscles are so tight?

[lolatx in reply to Sweetlolly11]

You may need a referral depending on where you live. You may be able to find someone in a urology office or gynecology office. Where I am from (in US) , they are somewhat difficult to find and I have heard of folks needing to travel a bit for treatment. It is absolutely worth the effort though. The gynecologist will assess your pelvic floor potentially but they do not provide the physical therapy.

You're on the right track - I would certainly bring the slipped disc up to the gynecologist and the physical therapist when you get in with one of them. That could certainly contribute to pelvic pain.

There’s a nice short Ted Talk on YouTube that addresses this topic called “how to save someone from a pelvic floor muscle attack” by Heather Rader. I recommend you check it out

[Sweetlolly11 in reply to lolatx]

thank you so much for all of this information! i feel like i'm a lot less in the dark now

[suzie44na]

Tarlov cysts can cause a lot of pain and bladder problems, usually found on MRI scan. Just a thought, I have these.

[Carlettejaque]

Hi, I think you may be suffering from Volvadynia. Doctors generally dont know much about the condition and prescribe Gabapentin (which doesn't work) or Amytriptoline which works a bit for some women but has nasty side effects. I have found that a way to treat and alleviate the burning is to keep a little jug of water by the toilet and every time you pee lean back on the toilet seat and rinse immediately with the water. Preferably warm water but cold will do. You HAVE to do this every time though. If you miss a go it will come back. Always take a bottle of water with you when out so that you can do this discretely while at work or out with friends. Don't use any sex toys for a while. I tried sex with this condition and it felt like I had been burned by a red hot poker! Using a sec toy could aggravate the condition. For the first week of this treatment pour the water over your genitals while you are peeing and after as it dilutes the urine/uric acid on the skin. It takes about a week to feel an improvement. It seems to me as a sufferer that it's the uric acid on sensitive skin that contributes to the condition. I had the condition bad for two years and initially had it helped by acupuncture but that is costly and you need to find a practitioner who combines western and eastern acupuncture. The rinsing technique seems to work. Let me know how you get on.

[Muffinman22]

I was diagnosed 35 plus years ago with urethral syndrome. This is pretty much exactly how mine started. I have to take one macrodantin pill a day or I will have symptoms.

[Sweetlolly11]

So much information! Thank you all, I really appreciate it. I'll try anything at this point. Day 7 of suffering just completed. Today was a lot better as in I almost didn't feel any pain at all, but now that I'm about to go to sleep suddenly the urge to pee is back and it's burning again. I've also noticed my lower back is starting to randomly hurt as well. That's where my herniated disc is.

I forgot to mention I suffer from constipation as well. I do have hypothyroidism that I'm taking medication for, but my diet never changes yet sometimes I go 2-3 times in a day and sometimes (oftentimes) I just can't go at all for days on end until it becomes uncomfortable and I have to drink coffee to get me going, which I don't like as coffee gives me a TON of anxiety, high blood pressure and just in general makes me feel bad. Not even then is it guaranteed I'll have a bowel movement.

I'm 25 and kind of sick and tired of being sick and tired. I've been chronically ill since I was about 20 years old, before that I was almost perfectly healthy and the transition to a chronically ill life did a number on my mental wellbeing.

[1Ginge1 in reply to Sweetlolly11]

A good gentle and efficient solution for constipation is Smooth Move., In the USA you can get it at most stores as it is a tea. Tastes good and works very effectively.

[Keys2theworld]

My first thought was a urine or kidney infection. I would definitely try the antibiotics in case you've introduced an infection. Also after you've been to loo, pour warm water over yourself. It acts like a douche or bidet. I remember sitting with my bum in a basin many years ago to get relief ! Also if it's itchy, then Vaseline is the best soother on tender areas.

[Sweetlolly11]

Update on my situation: burning urethral pain is now pretty much only happening exactly at bedtime, and I don't understand why. Throughout the day, most of the time I feel like normal, when I go to urinate at times there isn't any pain even at all, not even a hint of it, and only occasionally do I feel slightly uncomfortable just "down there", in the general region. But what I don't understand is how it is possible that: 1. it doesn't even necessarily hurt throughout the day, but then literally burns sometime within a few hours before I go to sleep (so not even at night in general, just as I become tired enough to sleep and then can't due to pain), 2. why exactly before bed? What triggers it? I only sit for a longer time before bed, that's the only difference I can think of. It's also important to note that previously when the burning would start, I couldn't even sit for an hour or two without having to moan about the pain, it was so bad, now it's just like I feel a slight need to urinate and the pain has subsided a great deal, to a point where if I'm distracted I won't even notice it anymore. Overall, in general the situation has improved for sure since last week, I'd say it's slowly getting better, but I just don't understand how and why the pain makes a sudden reappearance every night right before I go to sleep and is then basically gone throughout the day.