I have so many issues going on in my head I am forced to face them all alone. I've turned to eating chocolate just to feel a rush of something. I worry constantly about things that might never happen . I now feel I cant wait forthat time when I can escape all my fears my worries.
Nobody wants to be around me and I make no effort to be with people l am not a people person I get no joy being around people in fact I feel very uncomfortable when there are people around judging me or laughing at me because they know I have breakdowns.
I haven't been taking my meds properly but I hate being forced to sleep when I want to stay awake. Its like I am wanting my worries to stay with me constantly.
When I go out its straight in the car shop back in car and home again. I am frightenend of change and I know I wont cope if things go bad. I need help not tomorrow not in an hour NOW but we all know when depression hits we must wait for the system to awaken. I am going to lose myself watching tv eating chocolate and my smoothie because i cant eat solids but thats another ugly storyfor another ugly day.
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Dodo777
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A lot of people have major issues but are unaware of them and thus they struggle on aimlessly. This is not the case with you, you are aware of them. The difficult bit is doing something about it.
Have fun watching the TV and eating your chocolate. Its the best two things I love in my life. Enjoy it and dont think of anything else. If it werent for my TV,I would feel depressed 98% of the time. You are doing your own thing right now. And thats good by me. I have isolated myself from my friends because I am getting older. I hate dying my hair to wash out the grey. Everytime I dye my hair,it burns my scalp. So now I have almost 100% grey hair. AND I am enbarrassed to go outside into my neighborhood. I really feel you. Talking to this group is probably a good thing to do. You,hollar at me and I will write you back.
maryanne01. Hello lovely,you are in a bad place at the moment but things can change and they do,has anybody spoken to you about Mindfulness? I suffered with disability and depression for many years,have been on and off many medications over the time but because I became interested in Mindfulness and started to follow thier ideas ideas,I can honestly say I'm a much happier person.Give it a try their are books in the Library or online,you seem to learn to look outwards instead of being bogged down with continuous problems,you can do this on your own in your own time,no embarrassment involved,also it is non religious. Hope this is of some help.Come back for a chat,take care,I will be thinking of you.
Yes, mindfulness and taking life one hour at a time also helps me. I had to stop eating chocolate because of heart problems, so I substituted other sensory stimulation such as fragrance tactile, and lots of podcasts. Good luck.
You are not alone now that you're with this group. Please feel that we care about you and wish you all the best. I can totally identify with you so I understand what you are going through. Best of luck. You're in my thoughts and prayers. Warmest wishes and big hug xooooooo
hey! I am kinda new here, but wanted to talk to you anyway when I saw your post! Don't feel guilty about giving yourself a break whenever you need. Those people who laugh don't understand you, fortunately for them they haven't been through it. Never mind them! You're not alone and you will get through one minute at a time.
hello dodo 777,I've had counselling for my issues,its solved various problems but without my chocolate or a treat and a bottle of coca cola I would be depressed,so don't deny something that keeps you within the realms of being any more depressed than you might feel,I used to go out have a steady girlfriend,and have a well paid job,now I very rarely go out,and can't hold a job down due to having a few physical health problems,however I've taken stock of my life and I realised that maybe it was a blessing in disguise,I don't care what people say about me,I'm not doing anything wrong,I look through the weeks television magazine and mark of what I'm looking forward to,and I've had a pretty messed up life nothing that i could of changed,and just coming onto this forum can be a small step towards making you feel part of a caring organization,nobody will tell you what to do,it's all free and mostly good advice,nobody will criticise you,and if of course you find one sentence that gives you some comfort and strength then you've done a positive thing,keep coming on,have a browse around and say a few hello's along the way,and you'll build a safe and secure way of contacting other folk who have been in similar circumstances as yourself,so cheerio for now and have faith in this exclusive club,ttfn
Wow you are really in a bad place - you can always call the Samaritans they will listen to you - they won't laugh at you or deride you - talk about you and what you say to them is confidential. Yes it's good to let off steam on the forum and we will all listen and take on board what you are going through as some of us have been there - got the tee shirt - and have come out the other side.
Have you got any interests that can occupy your mind - reading, sewing, baking, going for a walk etc. I wish you all the very best and hope you can find a solution to help you through this dark time. Loads of hugs and kisses winging their way to you. 🤗🤗🤗🤗😘😘😘😘
Thank you all fir your kind replies and it has helped me cope . I know many of you are suffering too and my thoughts are with you all. Sounds a bit selfish but knowing others are struggling with me makes me feel I'm not so alone , which is the worst feelings ever. I wisjh you all well. I am touched by all your replies. I know it will pass. I dont like change and just the thought my life might be different in a few months freightens me to death.
I like my own company i find it less stressful when I have to deal with people and I can find myself in heck of a state of anxiety.
Please don't take this the wrong way but have you ever been assessed for aspergers or slight autism?
My hubby struggled as you say with depression,sleep probs and avoiding others,crowds etc.He was the only one in his family who felt more comfortable on his own than with friends.
He used to get very,very on the edge being given meds of various types.
Then poor bloke , ended up with me who accepted him like that and he stopped worrying a little.
Finally on taking one of our son's to an appointment with similar different to others traits the consultant diagnosed son with aspergers.Then turned to husband and asked if he knew he had aspergers.Having read up on it and got diagnosis the lifestyle has changed a little but mostly realising why hubby feels the way he does and that's ok has made him a much happier person and able to cope with his fibromyalgia,osteo,ulcers etc.much better.
There is no help. You have to do what is necessarily yourself. It starts with investigating how you work and then developing skills that work for you. A good book to get started with is "Meditation_A_Way_of_Awakening_-_Ajahn_Sucitto.pdf". It is a free download from
Meditation and mindfulness is best done in a group. There will be Buddhist groups in your area who can help you.
Find a yoga class near to you and go there. Moving the muscles is important. Emotions are in the body and by moving the body you change the emotion.
Your diet suggests part of the problem. Sugar high followed by insulin crash. Find something that is a bit slower to digest. Cannot advise you on this I am not a nutritionist. The bionome in your digestive system has an influence on mood. The bionome is dependant on the food you eat. You need to investigate this.
Lastly find a religious tradition that you can gel with. This will enable people networking via shared activity. Religious activity often involves movement and changing of mind state.
Hope this helps.
Huge hugs to you I hear you sister I can isolate when u am feeling down but it's not healthy long term a little bit of interaction with people is needed try and get out for a swim or a walk ....however it's winter and I do like to isolate myself until Jan so I get you totally ....your not alone remember that big community here to support you
Hey we have all been there with the chocolate. My sweet choice at the moment is condensed milk! It's wrong when I am eating it but sooo good! Depression sucks. I have suffered for 20 years. Tried just about everything in this time from the"pull yourself together" to oodles of antidepressants. It's weird the 1st day you really start to feel crap. The right thing to do would be to go out, try and cheer myself up, see family, friends ect. But no no what do I do. Lie on the sofa, watch sad films, eat junk food, smoke far to much!! It just doesn't make sense. But then again depression doesn't! I have come to terms with the fact I will be on anti depressants for the rest of my life. They keep me somewhat balanced! But still have bad days, actually bad weeks. I just have to get through them. I know the signs now but have to get through it. I saw a fab doctor at hospital who put me on a combination of tablets. Mirtazepine and venlefexine. If you don't want to see folk then maybe talking on line would be OK. If you do then I am here message me anytime. I can just listen or try and help. Dawn x
hey hope you are feeling a bit better by the time you read this post,
I understand how you're feeling, and it seems like I'm the same as you I'm always worrying about the future and always worry how I would cope if something bad happens. When of course we should be worrying about the present its easy to say but it is so hard. Sometimes its almost as if i enjoy the feeling shitty, i'd be having a ''alright'' day then i'd randomly think of something bad to make myself feel depressed and would want to go home.. or I could be out having a good time with friends then i feel randomly depressed. I suffer from really bad anxiety because I'm scared of death and I'm hypochondric. Sorry hope you don't think I'm selfish and think I'm going on about myself..I'd thought i'd mention because i read that you feel better when someone is also at a bad place which is understandable because I'm also the same.. i don't feel so alone because sometimes it feels as though its only me that has these kind of emotions. I'm always here if you want to talk about things I'm a good listener
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